Sometimes, well, many times, being single is the way to go. And we seem to learn that lesson the hard way.
You know within minutes if a date has gone off the rails.
I'm not talking about a "let's ease into this because of nerves" situation.
Crazy is crazy! Once you get that feeling of... "I'd rather be home listening to Adele," just go home and listen to Adele.
Redditor Zuzpo wanted everyone to share about the times they quickly realized being single was the better option. They asked:
"What was the moment you realized that you shouldn’t have showed up to a date?"
Are we so hopeful for love we'll ignore what is slapping us in the face? Why?
Wolf
Pbs Nature Wolf GIF by Nature on PBSGiphy"When he bit my forearm really hard after smelling the perfume on my wrist." ~ vanhamm3rsly
I hate charcuterie!!
"An alleged friend told me her coworker and I would be great together and wanted to do a double date at a festival with her and her husband. Date suggested he and I meet up the night before to get to know each other and I suggested a gaming bar I'd wanted to try."
"Date time arrives and he's not there. He finally shows up and tells me he had to stop home to let the dogs out so they don't sh*t all over the floor. He then proceeds to show me a picture of a floor covered in dog poop and says guess it didn't work. He is still wearing his work clothes."
"It has been three hours since work ended and he went home to deal with the dogs but didn't change. He proceeds to eat the rest of the charcuterie plate I ordered by himself and then orders wings for himself. We decide to check out a game since I have now paid for more game time. He wants a mall madness game that is not designed for two people. We settle on a playable game."
"It's not great. As we are wrapping up he tells me the last date he took here had sex with him in the parking lot he stares at me expertly. I tell him that's not going to happen. I tell my friend I'm skipping the festival. He's shocked and thought we had a spark." ~ Polyf**kery
Who's that Girl?
"My mom met a nice girl during the day, unknown to me. My mom and I were supposed to go out for dinner that night. She invites the girl, unknown to me, then ditches the dinner once she knows she has set me up on a date. My mom was very worried I was gay at the time."
"The girl and I get to chatting over drinks, she's fun, flirty, cute - and a meth-addicted sex worker who thought it was some weird kink game that she was being hired to get into the middle of. So...YEA. She was understanding when we realized the mix-up, but I gave my mom sh*t for that one for years." ~ Yvaelle
Blind Dates...
"I went on a date a few months after me and my college gf had broken up. I had matched with this girl off of tinder and we messaged a bit, but she was relentless about wanting to know more about my ex and how I felt after the break up. I looked past this and met her for dinner a couple nights later."
"I walked in the restaurant and my ex is sitting at the table under that girl's name. I turned around to walk out and got a tinder notification from the girl I had agreed to meet 'you’ll never be able to get away from me.' Should have stayed home that night, and steer clear of blind dates." ~ Automatic_Doctor4934
When in England...
Waving London GIF by PLAYMOBILGiphy"When she told me my English accent was dumb, and then repeatedly shouted out that everyone else in the bar had a dumb English accent. FYI, it was a bar in England." ~ notJeffbutGeoff
Yeah, people making fun of you or biting you is an exit strategy to utilize. RUN!!
I'm Done...
Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy"When at the party I met her at and her boyfriend said 'Go ahead, take her. I’m sick of her crap.'” ~ cleric3648
I'm Out!
"I was supposed to pick him up at his air bnb so we could go out for dinner and drinks. Turns out the air bnb was actually his parents house. I thought it was weird that he lied about where he was staying but figured he was just embarrassed so I didn’t make a big deal about it. When I suggested a place I wanted to go for dinner he told me his parents made dinner so he wanted to stay there to eat and go out for drinks after."
"I felt super awkward about having dinner with his family on our first date, but it got worse. He made me a plate of food, and had me sit at a table in the garage, and told me he’d be right back. Then he went inside and had dinner with his whole family while I sat alone in the garage. I wish I could say I noped out of there, but unfortunately I stuck it out for the worst date night of my life." ~ squisheekittee
400 times NO!
"When he said he was actually from an entirely different state, looked completely different from his photos and then asked if he could borrow $400 for Methadone before we even ordered. I left immediately. Been stalking me for over ten years. Fun times." ~ AlienFemTech
Just Run
"She was a kleptomaniac. Thought she was exaggerating or maybe just went through a tough time. Then she showed me the pile of legal paperwork. She was on 1st name terms with the judge she had been to court so many times. Then she asked me to touch her back."
"Said she felt super sweaty from the MCAT she'd taken and then showed me how she disposed of her used needles because she was a heroin addict. Should have noped out sooner but she was sweet but yeah, she needed a therapist not a boyfriend." ~ DeadlyChaffinch
Chicken Issues
mr bean eating GIFGiphy"When he didn't let me look at a menu, ordered for me (a water and a kids chicken tender meal- I'm 24), ate half my meal, and was talking so much about himself he spit pieces of chicken at/on me." ~ EstetheAinur
I'm Here!
"He was picking me up and texted me 'here' a little early so he had plenty of time to do this before I got down to his car, but he waited 'til I opened the door and there was about a dozen magazines (like rifle mags) on the passenger's seat and he said 'hope you're not some crazy liberal! don't mind these mags' and then brushed them onto the floor. It was super awkward/cringy. Also it was my first date since I rough breakup and the rest of it was just as bad if not worse, I ended up crying in the bathroom half way through." ~ lebrunjemz
And where did we go?
"Before our first ever date (which he told me he wanted to plan), I’d told him I had been vegetarian for a few years now and as long as where we went had vegetarian options, I didn’t mind where it was. He brought me to a steakhouse. Said he’d forgotten I’d said that."
"I ended up just having fries the whole night. Points to him, he did seem like he had actually forgotten and the conversation was good so I agreed to a second date. Now, I had also told him I was caffeine intolerant — couldn’t have any coffee, Coke, most teas etc. And where did we go? To the University coffee stand."
"I left to go to my archaeology class and my desk buddy tells me we are getting a new tutor because our first one got sick and couldn’t see the rest of the semester through. Guess who our new tutor was? Mr. Steakhouse and Coffee Stand Guy. I maintain to this day that it was worth it all just for the look on his face when he walked into class. I wish I was making this sh** up." ~ jungkooksboots
'wow you even walk like a guy!'
"When he said 'wow you even walk like a guy!' As soon as he got out of my car. Whatever that means. He then proceeded to be racist, sexist, and homophobic during this 'date,' which was more of a monologue from his part, and even implied I'm fat and that he had no interest in me before trying to kiss me. Please don't take people you don't know on dates using your car.... You'll be stranded with them." ~ redvaporeon-sk
HER!!
caught ugly betty GIF by HULUGiphy"When his phone homescreen and screen saver was of his 'ex girlfriend.'" ~ MamaBearCA
“perfect for him"
"I went to his house to play Magic after meeting him at my LGS a couple times, excused myself to pee and as I was peeing, he stood outside of the bathroom door and did an awful impression of the joker laugh while saying he’s been waiting for someone like me and other extremely creepy phrases about how I am 'perfect for him.'"
"The post peeing bathroom exit was so absolutely awkward. Riddled with me saying several different versions of 'Oh wow, that was a great joker impression haha' and him continuing to speak like the joker. It was the longest, most tense, fearful walk down the stairs. I left shortly after that. It still tortures me." ~ fleshsingularity
"technically"
"Had a great time at dinner, and went for a walk through a park afterwards. We're walking along and talking and she mentions to me that she is still 'technically"'engaged to a guy, but she was only marrying him because he had gotten her pregnant. But she had had a miscarriage a few days ago (had not told him yet), and now that there was no baby and she had met me she was going to tell him and break up with him. There was no second date." ~ techblackops
Cherry on top...
"Drove 50 minutes to her small town to watch a movie, turns out she meant at her place, and it was a sequel to a trilogy I had never started. She was pretty awkward which was fine but then she started REALLY over sharing saying she was a crack baby, and telling me all her trauma."
"That was the point I knew it was a mistake considering she had fibbed her way into the date. By the end of the night she was telling me she loved me. I left shortly after that and I let her down over text once I was home. Cherry on top- she got pregnant three months later from her boyfriend of 5 months." ~ asymptoticharacter
Thief
Oh No You Didnt GIF by happydogGiphy"When she told me she wanted to dine and dash, pretty much as soon as we ordered drinks." ~ That_Interview_4005
off the wagon...
"When she told me she recently celebrated 100 days of being sober and then suggested we buy some coke. She told me not to worry about it because she had done it a few times since celebrating those 100 days." ~ gintoclopus
Rants!
"When he went on a long and obnoxious rant about how my job at the time (assistant welder) was 'stupid and a waste of time' and that I should become a dental hygienist, a job I have no interest in, because 'at least it has a future.' The whole date itself was AWFUL. But it was at that point I realized, we were not a 'match' to say the least 🙄." ~ SpaceOctopus94
