There's always a reason behind why a person chooses to do something, but at the end of the day, it's still their choice whether they will follow through and do that thing, good or bad.
TikToker and trauma coach @iamjaysaxe, who also admitted to being a former cheater himself, shared that he's worked with "hundreds" of men through their worst relationship habits, cheating, and dealing with the shame of the things they've done wrong in their relationships.
According to him, there are "real reasons" why some men cheat.
Based on the people he's worked with, many do not cheat because they've fallen out of love with their partner or because they want to hurt them.
Rather, it might be a deep trust issue of not wanting to trust the relationship too much, based on how they were raised, so they seek connection elsewhere or intentionally sabotage the relationship.
Others get bored, which seems to be getting increasingly common thanks to screens and social media, so they seek out the thrill, not necessarily of cheating and having another partner, but proving they can get away with the act of cheating.
Finally, some struggle with feelings of inadequacy, and what drew them to their partner in the first place, like a drive to succeed or high intellect, might over time make them feel inadequate, so they'll seek out someone to cheat with who does not challenge them in the same ways that their real partner does, so they can trick themselves into feeling like they've achieved something.
You can watch the video here:
While some viewers appreciated the video, most were not buying these "real reasons" as anything more than excuses.
After all, a person might make mistakes in a relationship and need therapy, but cheating is a multi-step process that could be stopped in its tracks multiple times before a person ever actually reaches a bedroom or removes any clothes.
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
@iamjaysaxe/TikTok
While TikTok could appreciate that people are more complex than being cheaters or not-cheaters, they weren't interested in hearing new theories for why some people choose to break trust in a way that's entirely avoidable.
As always, if a person chooses to cheat, they're probably better off not being in a committed relationship.
@joehas/X