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Unfortunately women have to deal with creepy men more often than men have to deal with creepy women.
Society doesn't know how to tell men to take no for an answer. Boys are often coddled. Women, on the other hand, become targets.
As such, they have learned to spot the red flags from a mile away.
u/dronebuddy29 asked:
Girls of Reddit what makes a guy creepy?
Here were some of the answers.
Just Learn "No."
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Actually had a guy say "I don't take no for an answer" to me after I told him I didn't want to go on a date with him. I walked away from him and back to my office (this was in a college campus building), had a horrible feeling the rest of the day.
Fast forward to quitting time and I have to walk ~ half a mile to the parking garage. I see a coworker about to head that way and asked if he didn't mind walking with me. Turns out the student followed us there and tried to get into my car when I unlocked it. Thank god I had my coworker with me who scared him away.
Edit: Yes, the campus police were involved and the student was identified, he was banned from the building I worked in. Turns out two other girls had filed complaints about him as well (he followed one poor girl to her dorm apparently.) I honestly do not know what happened to him, I never saw him again.
WALL Of Men
I once experienced a wall of men. One guy at the bar started chatting with me and when I looked around I realized that all his buddies had blocked us in (facing away into the crowd).
After 20 minutes of small talk the guy asked if I wanted to get out and I said yes, he tapped one of his buddies on the shoulder and he let me get past him. I'm 5'2" and they were all 6Ft. When I finally found my friends they said they had all done a lap around the bar looking for me. But of course I was behind the wall of men.
Don't do that!
Read The Signals
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No self-awareness or notion of personal boundaries like when guys follow you around public places or follow you home intentionally and don't seem to understand what's really unsettling about that. I don't know if it's because I live in a big city, but this is surprisingly common.
Less "Creepy," More "Criminal"
Telling me personal things about myself. I had a guy at my old job mention that I took a different route to work one morning. Then he said a mix of letters and numbers. When I asked what that meant, he said "that's your license plate, right?". Another time he was standing behind me at the time clock and said my clock in code before I entered it.
Also he cornered me in a room and tried to kiss me. It was so awkward because his wife was my supervisor, and I was his superior (I was the nurse and he was the CNA), on top of that I was a new nurse and not at all comfortable in my role yet.
I ended up telling my co workers to keep us apart and make sure he didn't follow me in to rooms after that last part. Very creepy.
Take The CLEAR Signals, Once Again
Guy: go out with me
Me: nah no thanks, I'm married
Guy: so?
By far one of my least favorite interactions. Also staring. Uninterrupted staring. It's worse if they dont even come talk to you, makes me scared they're just going to follow me.
EDIT: Yes, I know some people zone out and stare unintentionally. For me, it's pretty easy to tell the difference, and I move around some to see if their eyes are following. If they are, they're staring, if not, they're zoning.
Please Respect My Me Space
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When a guy won't give you your space even when you implicitly or explicitly make it clear that you want your space. Without giving too many details, when I was younger, this sweet guy became creepy to me because he wouldn't leave me alone even when I said I wanted time to myself.
If they can't respect your boundaries, get out and fast.
I Am Not Land To Be Conquered
When you can tell they don't look at you like a person but like a conquest. I have this guy at work who's a little wierd but every time he talks to me, it's like his preconceptions of who I am and what I think are all he sees. It's annoying.
Like A Wolf
When much much older men think that all the young women want to have sex with them. I've worked with a few men like this and it really creeps me out especially when they look at a young woman and lick their lips.
Psychopathy
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The fundamental root of all creepiness is not treating you like a fellow person. Creeps are the people who read pick-up-artist books and memorize "game plans", where they see women like a puzzle that can be solved with the correct algorithm to unlock the sex prize inside. When they talk to you you can see the gears turning inside their head as they apply what you're saying to their strategy and pick some planned response that usually steers the conversation towards sex. They will never have a conversation that involves actually empathizing with or understanding you or expressing their own genuine feelings and hoping you'll understand them. They just want to steer you towards saying what they want you to say.
Close Talkers
When they just stand like REALLY CLOSE to me when I'm just trying to talk, or asking a lot of questions about my personal life when I hardly know them. Also watching me walk by then whispering to their buddies all around them, that really freaks me out.