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The Biggest 'They're Definitely Cheating On Me!' Signs People Ignored

A woman sitting up in bed as a man sleeps next to her.
Florida State University Researchers Find Predictors for Infidelity in New Study
(Wodicka/ullstein bild via Getty Images)

Reddit user ExerciseShort5622 asked: "What’s the biggest “they’re definitely cheating” sign you ignored?"

When our partner commits suspicious behavior, it's easy for us to jump to conclusions.

Most of the time, the conclusions we jump to are 100% wrong and are just our imaginations playing tricks with us.


In less fortunate situations, however, our fears proved to be well-founded.

Then there are the unusual, but far too common, cases where the behavior of our spouses seems so blatant and obvious that we almost refuse to believe the truth.

Even when it's right in front of us.

Redditor eugeneugene was curious to hear about cases of infidelity when people ignored the obvious giveaways, leading them to ask:

"What’s the biggest 'they’re definitely cheating' sign you ignored?"

When THEY'RE The Insecure One..

"Constantly asking where I was and accusing me of cheating lol."

"I worked 12+ hour shifts at a remote oil plant."

"When the f*ck was I getting time to get some on the side?"

"I had to strategically plan grocery shops."- eugeneugene

Like A Second Father...

"He was cheating with the neighbor, and she had little kids, both under five."

"We never really did anything with their kids, so we didn’t know them."

"One day out of seemingly nowhere, these two kids, both under five ran across their yard, across the street and up our driveway to hug him, all while calling his name."

"Kids don’t do this to strangers."

"Clearly, he’d been spending a ton of time over there with her and befriending the kids."- Lazy-Elephant-7477

Takes One To Know One...

"Bizarrely accusing me of cheating with no reason, evidence, or provocation."- Ima-Derpi

Channel 9 Reaction GIF by Married At First Sight Giphy

Oh, Sweetie...

"He said goodbye to his 'mother' and called her sweetie."

"When I asked if he called his mother sweetie he said yes."

"I later found out it was his ex."

"I didn’t know about her, and she didn’t know about me."

"She kicked him to the curb."- KathAlMyPal

Traveling Light...

"Started going to the gym all the time but never took a gym bag and always did her makeup and took a shower before and after."

"She was very manipulative and controlling, didn't think I could question or challenge her."

"Still I learnt a lot from it that's helped me have healthier relationships since."- mersa223

Light On Cash...

"He kept taking money out of the bank and never had money for even simple things like his commute."

"I suggested we start tracking our spending together and turn it into a game, and he balked."

"No wonder!"

"I was so naive."- AquaWoman_115

No Money Bollywood GIF by Tubelight Giphy

Be Safe, Not Stupid...

"When chlamydia showed up on my STD test."- queenbees20

Universal Signs

"Every time it has happened to me, there's been a sudden, noticeable distance almost like a switch flipped."

"Communication would drop off completely for long stretches, and I could just feel I wasn’t being respected or prioritized anymore."

"It’s not just the silence...it’s how you start to feel minimized, like your presence doesn't matter. It hits your dignity hard."- Zenjutsu

50/50 Chance...

"I was in a relationship that had kind of run its course, and we were clearly heading in different directions."

"At one point I told several of our mutual friends 'she'd either never cheat on me or she's already doing it and I'm oblivious'."

"They got REAL quiet."- InevitableAd9683

Awkward Ed Helms GIF by The Office Giphy

The Truth Hurts

"He was mean, to me only."

"I thought he was working too hard, and bent over backwards to make his life easier."

"I just suffered it for a bit, then finally called him out on it, with a 'the way you are acting toward me is not in character for you, and I want to know what's going on'."

"He broke and spilled all the damned tea, grateful to finally not be living a lie, and transferred all that pain right into me."

"MF. He'd been cheating for at least 8 mos with randos off the internet, then found one he 'loved' and was making plans for a future without me."- GentleComposure

Among The Many Reasons You Never Leave It Up...

"Came home, and the toilet seat was up."

"There is a 0.00% chance that she put it up."- Sanity-Checker

Reverse Psychology?

"Accusing me of cheating when it never even occurred to me to cheat."- OldButHappy

Fox Accuse GIF by New Girl Giphy

Better Than None At All?

"Different panties before and after work."- Cute-Pressure3818

Can You Even Call That Loyalty?

"Buying Rogain in bulk, whitening teeth, dressing nicer for work."

"Started to exercise more."

"Our sex pattern started to change."

"He wanted sex daily, instead of our one day on, one day off routine we’ve had for 10 years ."

"I remember telling him, wow, it’s like we’re newlyweds again."

"But little did I know it was because he was just so turned on all the time. (I suspect he was thinking of her) Making anything and everything into a big deal to argue and give silent treatment for days on end."

"At the end, placing a pillow between us in bed."

"He was being loyal to her while married to me."- Big_Orchid3924

Desperate Cover-Up...

"There were many red flags."

"The biggest one was when in all the years we were married, she never initiated sex, except one time."

"And one month later, she’s pregnant."- pheonixarise

Im Pregnant Mama Said GIF by Originals Giphy

It's easy to love someone so much that you might choose to ignore their flaws and weaknesses.

Ignoring something, however, doesn't make it disappear.



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