Search
AI Powered
Latest News
More from
Patrick Stewart Delivered His Own Eulogy 11 Years Ago—And It's Hilariously Raunchy
But earlier in his life, he had a delightfully irreverent sense of humor about his own death.
A video has resurfaced of Stewart's appearance at the 2015 Just For Laughs festival in Montreal, in which he delivered his own eulogy—and an absurdly raunchy one at that!
In his stand-up-style performance, Stewart mused that at his then age of 75, he'd already surpassed his life expectancy, and it got him wondering about how he'd want his legacy described.
He joked:
“How would I want to be remembered? What would I want people to say?"
"So in the event that this is it for me, I’d like to take a few moments to remember a great man whom I know has meant a lot to all of us here: Me.”
What proceeded was an eloquent speech turned hilariously raunchy. He began:
“Sir Patrick Stewart was more than just an actor. He was the greatest actor ever. He was also a husband and a father and a friend.”
"But most of all he was an objectophile who achieved sexual congress with literally thousands of inanimate objects.”
He continued:
“As a boy, Sir Patrick entertained his classmates at Mirfield Secondary Modern School where he dutifully honed his craft as an actor, developing his now signature baritone voice, and made sweet, secret lunch hour love to the janitor’s floor polishing machine.”
It went on from there, describing Stewart's supposed sexual conquests of the Royal Shakespeare Company's props department, including a number of "books, wigs, bicycles, and cafeteria trays.”
- YouTubeyoutu.be
And for the punchline, he let the audience know they'd shared a bit of his objectophilia with him after he'd made love to every seat in the theater where he was currently appearing. The laughter was of course uproarious.
The clip quickly went viral all over again in the wake of Stewart's death, giving fans a way to laugh through their tears.
Allyoop/Tiktok
V/Tiktok
solkaii/TikTok
Kazrick Fitz/TikTok
Nick/TikTok
Sammy Stardust/TikTok
nirvana/TikTok
Dani Napier/TikTok
whatchawantisbutter/TikTok
Reflekt/TikTok
Stewart has often talked about his affinity for thinking about the dark side and his own demise.
In a 2017 interview with the UK's Mirror, he said:
“There is a not a day goes by where I don’t think of my mortality.”
"I am 76 years old. I am married to a much younger woman and I cannot see her without reflecting on the differences in our ages and expectations and so forth.”
Hopefully, his sense of humor about it will be a comfort to those he left behind, including wife Sunny, son Daniel, and daughter Sophie. And, of course, legions of fans.
Most Read
oh myyy
Don't Miss Out
Stay ahead of the curve with the latest news and viral moments from Comic Sands & get exclusive subscriber benefits
Something went wrong. Please try again.
Get some Sand in your inbox.
Trending news and the best social social media commentary around it; we curate the internet right to your inbox while you get on with your day.
Something went wrong. Please try again.
