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People Explain Which 'Small' Social Rules They Refuse To Ever Follow

Woman with her arms crossed
Photo by ᕈ O W L Y on Unsplash

Reddit user GlitchOperative asked: "What’s a 'small' social rule you refuse to follow, even if everyone expects it?"

Home, work, the library, other people's homes, the grocery store; no matter where we go, there are rules and expectations.

Perhaps most of these are reasonable enough to assume everyone will follow along and do them to make the setting comfortable for everyone.


But every once in a while, there's a rule or expectation that was made to be disregarded.

Curious, Redditor GlitchOperative asked:

"What's a 'small' social rule you refuse to follow, even if everyone expects it?"


Constant Availability

"Being available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. I don’t answer my phone if I am already talking with someone else."

- merishore25

"I also turned off read receipts and typing notifications for texts. Nobody needs that information."

- fuzzy11287

Donating At Checkout

"I say no whenever I'm asked if I would like to donate to a cause when at the register buying something."

- retired_degenerate

"I hate when large corps ask customers to donate. They're more than rich enough to donate food to those in need. It's weird to ask random people who are financially struggling to donate."

- Fit_Priority_3672

Gratefully Accept

"I don't play the, 'Oh no, I couldn't possibly' game. If someone offers me something, like money, food, a gift, whatever, I ask if they're sure ONE time, and if they still want me to take it, it's mine. If their offer wasn't genuine, it's on them."

- Creepy_Grass897

"I also do this because if someone is offering, it feels a little rude to say no over and over again."

- CaffeinatedLystro

"I recently learned this, and have implemented it ever since."

"I have an elderly, recently widowed aunt, and I do things around the house for her, visit with her, and my husband fixes stuff to help her. She always wants to Venmo us to thank us, and I'd always tell her no, you're family, we don't mind helping, you've done things for me my whole childhood, etc."

"Finally, one day she said, 'Don't refuse money when people give it to you, and don't question it. Just take it.' I don't know why, but it just clicked."

- crinkle_cut_cheddar

A Complete Sentence

"Having an excuse as to why you’re saying no. Once I realized 'no' is a full sentence, things have been easier."

- BB8088BB

"I always say, 'I can't, but thanks!' No one has ever questioned me."

- FruitcakeBeast

Someone Has To Leave First

"Staying for an entire social event. I leave the moment I no longer want to be there."

- Heelsbythebridge

"At least you show up, that's commendable. These days I show up, have a drink, make conversation with a few people, and leave and go home. No one remembers you leaving early, but they will remember if you don't show and eventually stop inviting."

- EnthusiasmUnusual

Surprising The Manager

"Giving money at work to buy a manager (or higher level boss) a gift for Xmas, birthday, or whatever."

- wolterjwb

"As a boss, I hate it. I try my best to give back to the team, and yes, I will get gifts here and there, but it’s always awkward. I’d rather they not."

- Chubuwee

Going It Alone

"Bringing someone with me to eat or go to the movies. What's the big deal? I don't have to talk or share my overpriced popcorn."

- kavalejava

"Same. If I want to go to the movies and none of my friends are free, I’m just gonna go. I don’t give a d**n if anyone thinks it’s weird."

- i-fart-butterflies

Honest No Matter What

"Don't speak ill of the dead. F**k that noise. Dead a**holes are still a**holes."

- tesseract4

"Right? If there is an afterlife, and you can hear me talk s**t about you, good. You deserve to know I think you're an a**hole."

- IllyriaGodKing

Polite But Real

"I don't know if it's necessarily a small rule, but I don't keep it 100% professional at work. I still talk like a human being, I'm always polite towards people, but I don't talk like a robot who's afraid of saying anything out of line."

- relativlysmart

"I recently moved into management, and after having worked under so many bad supervisors, I decided to just continue being my genuine self and not forget where I came from."

"I don't try to be the 'cool boss' Michael Scott style, but I treat my direct reports like peers and mentees (and most importantly like fellow humans) and don't try to lead through fear and intimidation, because I've been in that situation and nobody should have to put up with that."

- jrbuckley0

Family Ties

"Pretending to like people just because we are related."

- Ok_Indepdence4154

"I’ll try my best to get along with someone I can’t stand in order to avoid drama or just avoid them if possible, but I’m not going to be fake and pretend to like them."

- Loganp812

Enjoy The Silence

"Forcing small talk when silence would be perfectly fine."

- dehsterfekt

"I feel like the best friends you have are the ones you can stay both silent without feeling a need to talk."

- prestonpiggy

Respect Goes Both Ways

"‘Respect your elders’ goes out the window when they’re rude to me."

- Lizzie-P

"I was at work once, and an elderly woman grabbed my arm and pulled up my sleeve to try to look at my tattoo."

"I pulled away and said, 'You could have just asked.'"

"She replied, 'I NEVER ask.'"

"It creeped me out so f**king much that I reported her to my manager. She was forced to apologize if she still wanted to patron the business."

"She was mortified. She really thought she could just touch people cause she’s old."

- nuitbelle

Elbows For Everyone

"It's comfortable to rest my elbows on the table. I'm gonna keep doing it."

- 99thLuftballoon

"Literally, medieval tables were easy to tip over from leaning on them. Also, many people usually sat at one table in a medieval hall, meaning there was no way to have your elbows on the table without taking up someone else’s space."

"So yeah, there’s no real modern reason anymore."

- Am_i_banned_yet_

Glorifying Being Busy

"I refuse to do the 'I’m so busy' brag. Everyone expects you to act like you're drowning in work to prove your value."

"When people ask how I am, I’m honest if I’m having a relaxing week. We need to stop glamorizing burnout as a personality trait."

- Pirah7

No One's Home

"If you knock on my door, I don't have to come answer or even acknowledge you were there."

- stokeszdude

"Growing up, we were told not to answer the door if we didn't know the person. I'm an adult and still do that. If I peek out the window and don't recognize you, I'm not answering."

- Dia_Beeyt


Each of these expectations are small enough that many people reasonable do them, but if they truly do not align with someone, it really won't hurt the other people around them.

It's easy to forget that we can say no and put our needs first, especially when doing so will not hurt or inconvenience anyone in any real way.

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