People Reveal Which Things They Regret Ever Finding Out

Ignorance is bliss, they say.

For better or worse, we don't always have the power to control when we come into information, and once we know the truth about people or circumstances, we can't go back to the way things were.

Curious to hear how things were never the same for strangers online, Redditor Jimbobsausage asked:

"What did you regret finding out?"

Not being valued for who you are hurts the most.

Abandoned

"My mother moved back to her home country when I was 9. I was always told she could never come back to my country due to visa/immigration issues."

"She confirmed last year that this was not the case and she could come back any time. I realised she chose not to. Ouch."

– anothercrazydoglady

Proverbial Twisting Of The Knife

"Way back in the day, I searched my name in my long term girlfriend’s gchat log. I quickly found a chat of her and one of her friends discussing how stupid I was for not realizing she cheated over the summer, and how sick of me she was. Ouchy."

– WNY4LYFE

Friendship Circle

"Over heard my best friend being asked why they let me hang around them. Their answer was it was out of pity."

– varthalon

"Stop hanging out with those people. They are not your friends. There are much better people to hang out with. And you don't deserve that treatment. No one does."

– GodsOfsand

The Ex's POV

"Meeting with ex - We were together at the time - at her place spontaneously. I know when she gets home so I figured I'd surprise her, take her out to do something, etc."

"She didn't get back. Unexpected and unusual, so I waited around across the street. In this situation I know better than to text and create push-back on any clue of her whereabouts. This type of unusual is that kind - the gut feelings and the sudden shock."

"If I did anything to imply I'm around, she may not have shown up. And thanks to this, she showed up."

"In a dudes car, 2 hours later. Dropped off, and lied about who it was. Her friend Jane isn't 6ft with a beard and glasses and definitely isn't a dude."

"I regret having to see it. I'd rather a break up or a clean, no cheating, in person conversation."

– Monsta-Hunta

How To End Grief Fast

"My best friend growing up got cancer and died at age 27. My husband was deployed to Iraq when she died, so I basically had to deal with it all on my own."

"I had taken all my vacation time from work to travel back home and lay with her in bed during her final days. She didn't leave me anything in her will, but left everything to our other best friend - which is fine by me, but weird under the circumstances. I went through YEARS of struggling with intense grief."

"About 3 years after her death, my husband broke down and told me they had slept together the year prior to her death, which was 4 years after our wedding - where she was the maid of honor."

"I called a couple friends to confirm, and it turns out she had nonchalantly told EVERYONE."

"I don't know which I regret more - finding out that my husband slept with my dying best friend OR finding out that our 'best friendship' was a complete sham."

"I got over my grief real quick after that, but I feel absolutely robbed of years of what I held close as good memories."

– Intelligent_Offer330

Once you know, you can't unlearn these unpleasant situations.

Olfactory Assault

"That the stench we’ve been smelling on my block in the middle of 100-degree weather was not in fact a possum, but rather, my neighbor- dead in his backyard for over a week."

– No_Brush_7706

Rest In Porn

"I inherited my wife’s late uncle’s computer. Let’s just say I had to delete a lot of unsavory porn that I’ll never tell my wife about."

– trainwreck42

Cost Of Indulging In Baked Goods

"How many calories are in a chocolate Costco muffin."

– IWantToWatchItBurn

It's debatable whether or not these life reality checks should be left undiscovered.

One By One

"When I found out a friend I grew up with had died. Then sat down and counted on my fingers how many people I grew up or went to school with are already dead. Jeez, I'm only in my 30's. Stop dying already people."

– Efficient_Insect_145

"I was eating their cheese pizza from the food court all the time until I learned each slice was 700 calories. Probably the best dollar to calorie ratio in existence but I cut down on that pretty fast."

"EDIT: went to Costco and had two slices for dinner. This comment got me hungry."

– Tv_land_man

Grandma's Gift

"When my grandmother died my mom had me send her ( my grandmother's) engagement ring back to her second husband's family. She had it for 25 years, so it was a bit of a project but I did it."

"When my mom passed away 2 years ago I found my grandmother's will. That ring was the only thing my grandmother had left for me. I always wondered why she left me out of her will because we were so close."

– Loreo1964

"My grandmother gave my mom a ring that was passed down for generations. My mom didn't wear it because it didn't have a diamond. My grandmother went to my parents' house one day and found the ring on top of the microwave with some trash."

"She secretly took it and gave it to my aunt to hold as executor of the will. When my grandma passed, my aunt gave me the ring. I bawled like a baby when I got it and have worn it ever since she passed away."

"My dad told me not to tell my mom because she would be upset. My mom is a raging narcissist with borderline personality disorder, so she would actually try to force me to give it back to her. She just assumes she lost it."

– ilovelasko

Silent Exit

"Finding out someone died when I thought they were just living a great life."

– jordan-lakers9394

"During a funeral I attended the person giving a speech about the deceased said the worst part about attending a funeral is having to deal with the knowledge that the person isn’t still out in the world somewhere being the person you loved."

"I always thought that was a beautiful way to describe it."

– Goddamnpassword

Brotherly Love

"At the funeral my aunt told me that my brother was really not my brother. My parents took in the son of a family friend when I was 2 and raised him as their own. When I was 12 and he was 23, he was hit and killed by a drunk driver."

"I was crying and my aunt told me to stop being a whiny baby and that I have nothing to cry about because he isn't even your brother. I looked up to him and I loved him so much. I miss you Russell. No matter what, you are my brother."

"Edited to let everyone know this happened 40 years ago and I am okay. The b*tch is dead. She got cancer and she did suffer and I did not go to her funeral."

– Mynameisinuse

So, I'm A Parent

"That I had a 21 year old son that I never knew about and that his mother told another guy that he was his father. I regret finding out because all it did was cause drama and hurt in between multiple families."

"*Edit - I've seen a lot of the same questions and just decided to add the answers here:"

"First I have not met him yet, so far he refuses to even meet me or his half brother. He was severely angry with his mother for hiding this for so long and said to her, 'I don't care who he is, my dad is the man who raised me, he's my father and I don't want to ever meet that other guy.' "

"I've seen pictures of him and he does look like me and like his half brother, but I have no idea his personality or if we have similar interests. I hope someday we can meet him."

"Second, I only found out when she got scared when she learned that I did the Ancestry.com DNA test to map out my family tree and she knew her son was about to do it as well and that the truth would come out, so she told me and him in advance of finding out by matching."

"Third, she told why she didn't tell me, but first the backstory. This was a fling I had when I was 21 with my next door neighbor who was 33 at the time. I knew her my whole life and always thought she was hot, but she became attracted to me when I got into college, as I got in really good shape physically."

"I saw her checking me out on multiple occasions and got a chance to shoot my shot one night when my parents were out of town for a week (I was still living at home) and she was always outside working in her garden, so I flirted, invited her over and with some convincing she did."

"We pretty much slept together every night that week and she told me she was on birth control and stupidly I believed her. What she didn't tell me was that she already had an 'arrangement' (here's where it gets weird), with a guy from her work that they would have a child together. She was very independent, didn't ever want to get married, but wanted a child, so she apparently found a guy at her work who was in his 50s and well off, who agreed to give her a child and co-parent, as well as provide everything financially to raise the child."

"I only heard about this 'arrangement' from my mother about a month later when she apparently told them in conversation about this 'arrangement' and that they were actively trying to get pregnant and that she might already be (she was). I honestly was suspicious if he was mine, but brushed aside those thoughts since she told me she was on birth control and would have been pregnant by then (which she was, but was lying)."

"She told me the reason she never told me is because I was young, hadn't started my career and didn't think I was ready to raise a child either financially or emotionally. She also was embarrassed since she knew my parents for years, knew me since I was young and didn't want her father or my parents to find out."

"Also, since she already had started talking to this guy about that arrangement, when she found out she was pregnant, she immediately said 'yes' to him and started sleeping with him right away so she could say she was pregnant as soon as possible so the timeline wouldn't be too suspicious. Apparently she kept him from the doctors appointments, so he just had to believe whatever she told him."

"So....she lied to me, she lied to the real father and had another man raise and pay for our child his whole life. So understandably the son, the father and I are all very angry with her, as well as other family members."

– agent_x_75228

Every time I hear news of a friend who is terminally ill, it breaks my heart. Then the guilt sets in of me neglecting to keep in touch, which isn't helpful considering people tend to continue remaining distant were it not for the unfortunate news.

Nevertheless, it's always devastating hearing someone you used to know well is no longer with us and that any opportunity to tell the passed individual your thoughts is no longer an option.

Based on the Redditors' shared experiences, which ones would you prefer, or not prefer, to discover the truth if you were in their shoes?