You got to have friends.
There are shows about the beauty of friendships.
There are shows about the downfall of those connections.
I think we should focus more on the downfall.
We often turn a blind eye to the people we can and have called friends.
That can be a big mistake.
Don't let loneliness lead you.
Sometimes people just have to go.
Redditor dragonXgal wanted to know what signs we should look out for when it comes to certain "besties."
So they asked:
"What are red flags in a friendship most people brush away?"
Friends who never ask about you... or ask but then only listen long enough to turn the convo back to them.
I hate that.
Walk slow...
Owl Creeping GIFGiphy"Continually feeling like you want to say something but should hold your tongue."
WilletteKinoshita
"This, have to walk on eggshells around them. Can't really communicate with them because they will take everything personally and blow it out of proportion."
kryptonite753
Tick Tick Boom...
"When you hang out with them it feels like you're defusing a bomb when theres nothing going on right then."
thedialupgamer
"I had to let go of my 'best friend' because of this. With my real friends I could always just respond to a text message with the first thing I thought of. With this girl I felt like I had to carefully consider what I was saying and then reword it several times before I could hit send because I didn’t want to be dismissed or berated in any way. That’s not friendship."
By Nature
"Really jealous and possesive friends. I'm a jealous person by nature, and even though my jealousy flares up when I see my friends hanging out with other people, I would never let them know. Why? Because I don't want them to feel bad about doing the things they love (eg. having a social life outside my little world)."
"If a person tries to box you up because they want you all to themselves, it's not a proof of love or companionship. True love (in any kind of relationship like friends, family, lovers) is shown by respect and allowing the other person to have free will."
lovecraftianslu*t
Liked Most
"Friends who are good to you when one on one but constantly put you down In group settings. This is a big sign of insecurity/jealousy. Other signs: inappropriate attention seeking behaviors, trying to twist the situation on you when confronted about things, not respecting your boundaries, is super friendly with new people but in a disingenuous 'I wanna be liked the most' way."
"Then constant gaslighting, getting mad at you for not going by the exact same moral playbook as them, when in group settings they get really uncomfortable and try to change the subject or put you down extra if attention is on you, acting they like can take constructive feedback but actually taking it out on you in small ways throughout the rest of the day."
-MattTheRat-
And Now?
Oh No Anger GIF by KingfisherWorldGiphy"You see you got a private message from them and your gut reaction is to start getting nervous or anxious."
"'What is it this time...'"
FernandeWorm
There is a very informative list.
Guess what?
Nick Offerman Popcorn GIF by NBCGiphy"Friends who gossip excessively. If they're talking about other people, chances are they're talking about you."
Jalaphi23
"And people that send you screenshots of private messages with other people. Guess what? Your private messages are being sent around too."
Rikosae
Caring
"Being dismissive of all your interests and achievements. Meanwhile everything they do, no matter how mundane, is amazing."
TijuanaMccrory
"And then you bring this issue up and they give bs reasons like 'it’s hard for me to care about something I don’t know about” or even further “you’re being sensitive/erratic/emotional' and you just sit there thinking 'I’m sure glad I still attentively listened to all those times you bored me with your financial spreadsheets you made to decide what car you would buy...'"
TGDivide
Not Real
"They only talk to you when all of their other friends are gone."
"My 'best friend' in high school did this with boys. If she was dating someone I was invisible. I can only think of one guy she dated where this didn’t happen."
pizzapeople31
"Same. I 'broke up' with her after 10 years of being best friends cause I couldn’t handle the emotional turmoil of the intense loneliness of hanging out with someone almost every day to nothing at all for a few months till she was single again. Every time I would get right again she would become single and I would fall back into it so I just put a hard stop to it. It’s best that we aren’t friends than settling for being her placeholder."
bendydendi
2 Way Street
"Always asking for favors but never there when you need them to return one. It's the fact that they act like you are the best of friends when they're around you because they want something, then Immediately blow you off once you've helped. Had a few so called friends like this. They weren't around for long."
"Yeah a friendship is a two-way street and ones that only go one way are not healthy."
-eDgAR-
100%
Fuck You Season 4 GIF by FriendsGiphy"Friends that don’t let you have any other friends and require 100% of your time when they can’t give you the same."
sexyandnotyours
All of these signs are IMPERATIVE! Trust!
What things would you add to this list? Let us know in the comments below.
Mount Sinai Medical
@Acyn/X