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Dyson Just Came Out With Air-Purifying Headphones That Go Over Your Face–And The Jokes Are On Point

Dyson Just Came Out With Air-Purifying Headphones That Go Over Your Face–And The Jokes Are On Point
Dyson; @matt_insley/Twitter
Erica Diaz
By Erica DiazApr 01, 2022
Erica Diaz
Have you ever read something where you just KNOW the writer talks with their hands, does the sound effects, and would bust out a little dance if it suited the story? That's Erica. She's a colorful storyteller whose sense of humor and fearless honesty make a big impact. Her rants might go for the emotional jugular, hit your funny bone, or shock you and your mama out of your fajas. Usually it's all three. Often chronicling her life in Florida, her stories are full of characters like "Bikini Rifle Lady", "Mariachi Neighbor," and "Barbara The NextDoor Evangelist." There's almost always a message in the madness, and that's what people connect with most. Also her deep and undying love for Tevin Campbell. You can find more of her work at www.EricaFazio.com
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Dyson is a company known for it's cutting-edge products - both in function and design. For a while their ad campaigns even leaned on the elegance of their "sleek, functional, and futuristic" products.

That future, unfortunately for us, seems to be a dystopian hellscape; or at least that's what people think after seeing their newest design.

After several years of development, Dyson has finally released a "wearable high-end audio device" (headphones) that features a magnetic face visor. That face visor functions as an air purifier, based on Dyson's "30 years of air filtration expertise."

They're calling it the "Dyson Zone."

Chief engineer, Jake Dyson, on Dyson Zone technology:

“Air pollution is a global problem – it affects us everywhere we go. In our homes, at school, at work and as we travel, whether on foot, on a bike or by public or private transport. The Dyson Zone™ purifies the air you breathe on the move. And unlike face masks, it delivers a plume of fresh air without touching your face, using high-performance filters and two miniaturized air pumps."


For those who missed it in the clip above, the Dyson Zone looks like this when worn:

The problem people have with the product is a two-fold one. Firstly, the tech.

The Dyson Zone air purifier works, in part, by spraying the air you exhale away from you. At other people.

The design for the Dyson Zone started pre-pandemic, so no real thought was put into the fact that the technology was perfect for literally rocketing disease at other people.

People are concerned:





The second major problem people have with it is ... well ... we'll let the people speak for themselves.










Several people asked and assumed that this was an April Fool's joke from Dyson, but the announcement was made March 30. The company has also assured multiple people via social media that there is no joke, the product is slated to go on sale later in the year.





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