In school, there is always the "quiet kid" whom people tend to make assumptions about.
Campuses are full of different student demographics trying to co-exist, and when there are those who feel like they do not belong to a community, the lack of a connection can lead to a tendency of avoiding social interaction.
Curious to hear from those who actually acknowledged introverts, Redditor BuhnanaSlug asked:
"People who've befriended 'the quiet kid' in school, what things did you wish your other classmates knew about them?"
Adverse situations can influence people to be introverted.
Problems At Home
"He was sitting on a rock at school by himself, I said if I see him there again I'm ganna tell him he can't, he's gotta come hang out with us cause I didn't want to see him by himself anymore. He didn't have to talk to us if he didn't want to. I wasn't going to let him be a target to anyone."
"He intergrated into our group nicely and quick. We all joked that because he's quiet he'll murder someone mostly being me for making him be social and he ran with the joke, his social skills weren't on par with the rest of us."
"One day we both got to school early and we sat down where our group hung out together and he turned around and told me his dad went to jail the night before. His father had been belting his mother for a few years and I think it stunted a lot of his social skills. We've been best mates for the past 15 years now. He's often the life of the party when we all catch up! I'm very proud of him!"
Unpopular Friendship
"He was brilliant, ahead of his time, and the best friend I have ever experienced. He was tormented for being so smart. Our friendship was frowned upon because we were a boy and girl. He treated me like that didn't matter (1956). When his family moved, I looked into their empty home and cried."
Home Life
"He was nice enough but even more strange at home. His parents were clearly the issue but he was very different and telling anyone what his home life was like would have been a curse."
People with undeveloped social behavior are withdrawn because they are not given fair chances.
A Speech Impediment
"She was just shy because of her stutter. She didnt smell like they said and was insanely smart. She got married last Saturday and I was her MOH"
A Different Social Pace
"He took his time talking. It was unnerving at first but then kind of cool. Like he actually thought about every response he made and how those responses could be perceived."
"People can be cruel and pushy though because he seemed slow. It could be pretty bad..."
The Regular Customer
"I wish my classmates knew that this quiet kid now visits me weekly at the restaurant I work for and orders his usual. He was the kid with a special instructor in each class, made fun of for it, among other things. Now he is independent and works/lives on his own. We bond over anime and kingdom hearts, which I tend to play the music of over the loudspeakers at work when he comes by."
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The Transfer Student
"In eighth grade there was a new student who was extremely shy and sat next to me in History class. Little by little, I became one of the only people who he'd open up to. I learned that he had Aspergers and had recently transferred from a school where he was consistently bullied."
"I wish people knew how intelligent he was; he was one of the smartest people I had ever met. He told me he dreamt of working for NASA one day and how passionate he was about physics and math. We parted ways after middle school because we ended up going to different high schools. I am now in college and was curious on what he was doing one day so I did a small google search."
"He's studies physics at MIT and lectures prospective students on differential equations."
"He's still one of the smartest people I have ever met."
Wealth does not always result in avarice or greed. Sometime, rich people are just quiet.
The Super Fan
"The quiet kid at my school was 1 stupidly rich 2 was wicked into superheros 3 he was just a allround good kid."
A Different Class
"One of the quiet kids at my school was also super rich, it was weird. Said he just didn't like most people and didn't enjoy talking to them. Wasn't social awkward either."
"All the richer jock types bragging about their 5 year old cars their parents gave them then there was this single brand new AMG always parked in the front that he never bragged about. He constantly had on a different ultra expensive watch. To this day the only time I have seen someone wearing a Patek Philippe was on him freshman year of high school."
The Cautious Friend
"I befriended a shy, hard-working, and really smart student named Elizabeth (Beth for short). After a year of hanging out and her coming over to my house, she finally invited me to hers."
"I was stunned by what I saw."
"She was absurdly rich and wealthy. Her house wasn't a house at all, it was a mansion and she lived in the wealthiest part of town."
"I was shocked and asked her why she was so quiet in school. She said, 'I don't want to be friends with people who only see me as a free bank card."
"We're still friends to this day."
Bullied Rich Girl
"Had a friend like that in 5th grade. She was quiet and was getting bullied, but I became friends with her after trying to help her out of it (ended up getting bullied myself though) but I did not expect her to have so much money.. it was nice to know she didn't use it to her advantage and just wanted some friends. I heard she changed though.. but I can't say for certain and it's not nice to assume. Hope she's doing well."
Being quiet also does not mean there is cause for concern.
"Weirdo Rocker Phase"
"I feel like I was the quiet kid, but kind of on accident. I wasn't shy or anything, I just didn't have a lot of friends and in eighth grade I went through kind of a weirdo rocker phase so I think I intimidated a lot of my classmates."
"I think I became the pet project of one of the nice cool girls, because she became super friendly in our last hour. She noticed that I spent a lot of time writing and started asking about it. She thought it was fun and I was eventually comfortable enough to share some of it with her, but she never badgered me about it or made fun of it."
"I don't know if she ever went back to her friends and made fun of me. If she did, I never heard about it (it was a small school. I would have.)"
Leave Them Alone
"They're not 'up to something' just because they're quiet. and yes, they're fine so stop asking them if they're ok or mad at you."
Egregious Assumptions
"Being a quiet redhead growing up made me not ever want to speak to strangers for any reason lmao women wanted my hair color/volume and men thought I was kinky. Couldn't go anywhere without comments about it from someone."
"And people wondered why I dyed the sh!t out of my hair as a teen."
You never know what people are going through.
So instead of making assumptions about the reticent, being kind by acknowledging their existence with a smile or a wave is better than asking, "Are you okay?" or "What's wrong with you?"
Because it's those who make assumptions about other people who are socially challenged.
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