Self-care has become a relatively hot topic of discussion within the last several years. Being open, and honest, about what you're going through mentally and the types of help you're receiving is important, as it can help others feel more comfortable with searching for any kind of help they might need.
With so many therapists, and so many disccusision points, it's great we can share the biggest takeaways we've learned from our sessions online.
One of the few good things the internet is for.
Reddit user, slowlythrough, wanted to learn from your breakthroughs when they asked:
"What was the best thing you ever learned from a therapist?"
Depending on your job and day-to-day life, you might be interacting with dozens upon hundreds of people every single day. How you interact with them, and more importantly, how you handle yourself, can make all the difference.
Don't Take Responsibility For How Others Acts
"How people act is a reflection of them, not me."
Commercial_Zombie196
"I had this revelation with a friend of mine. We realised that, when someone didn't understand what either of us were talking about, I would blame myself and he would blame the other person. It made me realise how different everyone is in how they communicate and respond to others."
AlterEdward
You Are Not Responsible For Others
"That all emotions have their time and place. Also that I can’t control how other people feel. It’s not my job to keep them happy or satisfied. I am allowed to let people be angry or upset."
stewiesaidblast
"This is important, I started becoming progressively more assertive and confident ever since I came to this realisation"
frankjohnsen
You Don't Have To Be About That "Hustle Life"
"My worth is not determined by my productivity."
"Being raised by a workaholic Marine and then having a series of nightmare bosses led me to have a severe guilt spiral if I spent a most of day not "doing" something."
kayarreff
"I agree, and I'm not a tool. I don't have to "do something", "be more productive", and not everything has to be about work."
"There's also nothing wrong with being "lazy". We're not robots. I wasn't put here on this planet to be a slave until I die."
PandaMayFire
If you need help with how you think about yourself, consider these lessons on self-reflection and metacognitive practices.
Speak Your Mind
"People don’t know what you’re thinking or wanting if you don’t say it. If you don’t communicate your emotions and thoughts, you can’t expect people to mind-read, and then get upset at them for not doing what you expected."
lhy13
Metacognitive Practices Are So Important
"You can step back and think about your thoughts."
"I know that sounds obvious, but it was not obvious to me as an angry, sad, 17 year old."
"Diagnosed with ADHD at 30. That advice probably saved me from making a ton of impulsive mistakes over the years."
iph0ne
Don't Accept Everything
"If you take good thoughts with a grain of salt why not also take the bad with a grain of salt? Hear it, recognize it, and let it leave."
findthefish14
"I like this one. It resonates with something else I learned about intrusive negative thoughts regarding myself, my future, my past, my whole life basically."
"When it all goes spiraling it’s important to interject those thoughts with a quick, 'ok, but what if it all works out? What if all my hard work actually does pay off?'"
"Both outcomes are entirely possible but we spend so much time sucking out energy by acknowledging the more dreadful negative thoughts, without even recognizing the hopeful positive ones."
barebackguy7
What about the big ones? The lessons you should start practicing right now?
Your Actions Are Not Your Thoughts
"A counselor at my university taught me that just because your anxiety tells you something will happen, that doesn't make it true. One way to illustrate this is to place a pen on a table, tell yourself you won't be able to pick it up, and then do it anyway. It feels so weird but also so comforting to know that your thoughts don't have as much influence on your life as they want you to believe. The therapist who told me this was just an intern at the time. I really hope she has been able to help people the same way she did me where ever she is now."
BlossomtheMare
Place Your Chips Wisely
"You have a limited amount of energy and time in any given day, and you get to choose where you place that energy. Like chips at a roulette table."
"Every angry twitter response, Reddit argument, etc is me putting those chips on those squares. My stack dwindles each time."
"Angry thoughts about a news article, an opinion I disagree with, that a--hole driver on the freeway, all of that takes energy, my chips. An extremely limited resource."
"So I’m trying to live though that lens and make the best possible decisions with my stack. That a--hole driver gets none of my chips anymore. YA CANT HAVE EM F-CKFACE."
"Today I was about to have a negative interaction online so I got up and pet the ever loving sh-t out of my cat instead. Like world class scratches - he was stoked."
"Chips. Place them wisely."
"I stop myself many times a day from doing it. I’m much happier now. Still f-cked up, but happier in my stew if that makes any sense."
campoanywhere
Nothing Else Need Be Said
"'No.' Is a complete sentence"
no-guac
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