32-year old Nico Tortorella has a hot take on bottom-shaming within and outside of the queer community. A bottom is usually the receptive partner during penetrative sex.
Tortorella, who is gender-fluid, gave a candid interview with Attitude where they discussed the stigma surrounding anal sex.
"There's nothing more masculine than bottoming."
"I think that's [the stigma around being the receptive partner in anal sex] just a problem with the a**hole in general."
"And deeming certain body parts as dirty or filthy."
"I think that is a deep-rooted issue with the body in general, whether you're male-bodied or female-bodied."
They went on to say that "specifically for men to be put in this 'sub-position' is not masculine," which is when they clarified:
"Anyone who's bottomed ever knows you need to man the f'k up to get the job done."
A great poet once said 'There's Nothing More Masculine Than Bottoming' https://t.co/eKOO7sVzeC— The Gay Darren Criss (@The Gay Darren Criss)1602442066.0
@AttitudeMag Imagine how tired we are— Daniel Preda (@Daniel Preda)1602455550.0
@AttitudeMag @NicoTortorella bottoming is an act, not a person. it’s not “masculine” or “feminine”.— first gay caveman (@first gay caveman)1602338422.0
@AttitudeMag @NicoTortorella They’re not wrong!— 🐑 (@🐑)1602449647.0
@notthebandfool @AttitudeMag @NicoTortorella where have you been? social media is full of bottom shaming.— 𝕮𝖆𝖒𝖊𝖗𝖔𝖓 𝕸.𝕳𝖆𝖙𝖙𝖊𝖗 🌈 (@𝕮𝖆𝖒𝖊𝖗𝖔𝖓 𝕸.𝕳𝖆𝖙𝖙𝖊𝖗 🌈)1602327563.0
Tortorella and their partner, Bethany C Myers, have a polyamorous relationship.
Both partners have been advocates for gender and sexual fluidity.
look, we all go through it in our own ways but i’m losing my mind at the fact that nico tortorella is non binary an… https://t.co/rEx0vG1Ofx— vampironique emma houxbois (@vampironique emma houxbois)1602461329.0
When they ask “are you mask? https://t.co/DPhtu9c0IK— MachoBGrantXxX (@MachoBGrantXxX)1602354006.0
LOVE https://t.co/U3aQleoIyM— Wayne 🏳️🌈 (@Wayne 🏳️🌈)1602312221.0
and voting. bottoming and voting. https://t.co/EDXMC31zhp— Nico Tortorella (@Nico Tortorella)1602250620.0
Tortorella said of their relationship with Myers:
"I think both of those words, queer and polyamorous, are heavily weighted and they mean different things to different people. And what they mean to us works for us. And sometimes it doesn't."
"I am kind of a serial monogamist in my polyamory … I love dating one person at a time."
"I'm married, yes, but I love dating one person at a time."
"I have a partner in LA that I've had for a long time, but I'm not his only partner; he's not my only partner."
"We don't have all the answers, but we're going to figure it out. I'm sure other people will try to give us unsolicited advice on a regular basis."
Tortorella and Myers plan to continue to be outspoken on both their love and sexuality, and Tortorella, ostensibly, on gendered roles in queer sex.