A Black mother’s response after being questioned by a stranger has gone viral, with people weighing in with different responses.
Keia Jones-Baldwin has a TikTok account under the username @raisingcultures where she talks about her family and especially her adopted and foster children. She recently shared an interaction where a stranger questioned how she knew her son, who is White.
The video sparked a lot of discussion around the issue.
@raisingcultures These are the types of interactions we desire to avoid 😭🤦🏾♀️ #adoption #transracialadoption #brownmomtok
The video shows just the ground as Jones-Baldwin speaks to someone else.
The stranger asks the mother:
“How do you know him?”
Jones-Baldwin immediately understands the stranger is asking how she knows her son. The mother clarifies she’s not his teacher or his babysitter.
She’s his mother.
According to the TikTokker, the stranger made a face like she didn’t believe it.
The text overlay on the video talks about how traumatizing it is when her son is constantly stopped and asked these kinds of question. Questions that are only asked because of the difference in the color of their skin.
Commenters voiced their support for Jones-Baldwin.
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
While others said they would have reacted poorly in her place.
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
Jones-Baldwin responded to a number of comments surrounding the issue.
But there was one in particular she had to make a follow-up video for. One comment effectively said the stranger was right, because sometimes kids are kidnapped.
But the basis of the interaction was racism.
@raisingcultures Reply to @gxgxufiblbkxyostisitsit Why would I kidn*p a child and take him to Walmart🤔 #transracialadoption #familiesdonthavetomatch
“These conversations should not happen if it’s solely based on the color of one’s skin.”
As Jones-Baldwin points out, these ‘conversations’ wouldn’t have happened if she were White, or her son was Black. The stranger didn’t see fear or discomfort on the boy’s face, she just saw it was a different color from his mother.
Which is why these conversations aren’t fully necessary.
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
Finally, one has to wonder why Jones-Baldwin responded at all.
She had no obligation to the stranger to explain herself.
However, for people of colir, the rules are often different.
If she didn’t respond, it would have been worse.
@raisingcultures Reply to @symorasummer It's exhausting and yes at times I do become angry because move around lady 😒 #transracialadoption #familiesdonthavetomatch
She says:
“When I don’t respond it seems as if it escalates. So I try to de-escalate the situation as much as possible.”
The situation can escalate by having security called, or even strangers trying to snatch her son, thinking they’re rescuing him from being kidnapped.
Jones-Baldwin has to respond, or she risks the situation becoming worse on her and her son.
That’s why she responds.
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
@raisingcultures / TikTok
The videos started a discussion on why someone sees the family so differently than they would another family.
And made some good points about knowing when to say something and when to leave a family alone.
Hopefully, more people start to ask why they think something before they open their mouths or act on their racial bias.