We can all be honest with ourselves here. 93% of the Internet's existence is due to the existence of pets and the funny things they do. No longer are we forced to go to the office and do our best to explain what funny thing Sasha did when she heard her food can open, but the fact this imaginary story could be applied to cats, dogs, or gerbils is what makes pets so awesome.
Reddit user, u/Khajurii, wanted to peek into the humor of our pets when they asked:
Pet owners of reddit, what is the biggest flex your pet attempted?
Pet Steps
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One of my dogs used the other dog as a stepping stool to climb up on the couch.
Straight up walked up the one laying next to the couch to get up there. Just blatant disrespect.
If There's An Obstacle In Your Way, Get Rid Of It
I have a potbellied pig named Luau. I was outside on my patio working on a craft project while I let him run around the yard. He kept coming up and bumping against the table to see if I had a treat or would pet him and messing me up, so I put a spray bottle of water next to me. He knows it and doesn't like getting sprayed, so will stay away and exercise instead of bothering me.
I went inside for a minute, came back out and the spray bottle was way on the other side of the yard and Luau had climbed into my seat and was standing there happily wagging his little pig tail.
A Dog Can Scream??
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I bought my 10lb dogs this gigantic plush bed to put on my side of the bed because I'm tired of sleeping with them, figured I'd have to babygate them there for the first few nights but nbd.
The first night it went okay, a little whining, quickly settled down and went to sleep. The second night, my girl dog, who I've had since she was a puppy, decided she was not going to stand for this inhumane mistreatment, and literally stood on her back feet and SCREAMED.
I've never heard a dog make the f-cking noise this banshee was making. I thought she was dying. I moved the babygate to get to her and she stopped screaming and hopped up on my bed and curled up like she usually does like nothing was ever wrong.
Go Ahead. Bark At Me. See What Happens...
My dog hardly ever barks and is very well-behaved. When we go for walks, every dog we walk past in my neighborhood barks ferociously at him.
He pees in their yards.
Only in their yards.
They Call This "Revenge Turd"
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I have a bell hanging on my front door that my dogs ring when I need to take them out. My husky started ringing it and when I got dressed and put my shoes on, she would go lay in my spot on the bed and not go out.
Once I called her bluff and didn't get up from the bed. So she pooped on the floor. Absolute power move.
Sending An Important Message
I have a Blue Heeler. I was moving to Germany, and selling things on Let Go. She did not like the idea of people taking our stuff. So she started getting aggressive.
So when I saw it starting to happen, when the next customer arrived, she got put in a bedroom.
The next time a customer arrived, she grabbed a stuffed animal and put it in her mouth as if to say "I will not act like I will bite someone" AND carried the animal around in her mouth the entire time the people were there. Kids petted her, everyone thought she was so cute, etc.
For the next 2 weeks as I sold stuff, when people came over, she had a stuffed animal in her mouth ...
One time my bird was really mad about bedtime. She flew to the curtain, peeped loudly until I watched, then pooped on the curtain while looking straight at me.
She was poop trained and definitely knew what she was *doing...
How Dare You Go On Vacation?
My rabbit when I went out of town for a weekend. I lined up someone to stay with her. I was just heading back to my house when I got the call to get home NOW because the rabbit was acting weird. Listless, turning down treats.... all things that point to the beginnings of GI Stasis which is bad.
I get home and sit with her for about 20 min. Yep, she's showing signs. Get her to the emergency vet.
$300 for the vet to tell me her diagnosis: drama queen. The rabbit was just upset that I wasn't home.
An Everyday Greeting
This is definitely my fault because I've encouraged it but it's still funny. Everyday I come home from work and give my two kids a hug or a pat on the head or some show of affection.
The dog will whine and follow me around the house until I drop to both knees on the floor and give him a hug.
Important Clarification
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I showed my new hamster to my best friend and he started pulling his own poop out of his butt with his teeth and threw it at us.
The hamster.
Not the friend.
note on @mychal3ts/Threads post