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People Break Down How They Realized Their True Sexual Orientation

Group hug with people holding rainbow flags
Janosch Lino/Unsplash

Reddit user TheGreek1 asked: 'What made you realize your true sexual orientation?'

Everyone has a different journey on their road to self-discovery.

Especially when it comes to their sexual identity, many young adults struggle with not fitting in and wondering where they belong in social situations.


It's common for many of these individuals to be ashamed and suppress their identity for fear of being judged or ridiculed, while others have a support system at home or among close friends.

Curious to hear how people arrived at their moments of self-discovery, Redditor TheGreek1 asked:

"What made you realize your true sexual orientation?"

Exposure to media helped these Redditors with their epiphany.

The Guy On TV

"So one day I saw a tv show, and there was a gay guy in some part of it, so I thought to myself, am I gay? And I came to the conclusion that I am in fact, straight."

– ShapeShiftingBruh

"Same! Or you may see a good looking guy but it doesn’t feel the same way as seeing a good looking woman. I hope that makes sense."

– gomeazy

Erotic Magazine

"I stumbled upon a stack of old playboys when I was 7 actually. I was very very intrigued. Before that I thought boys and girls both had penises lmaoo."

– 335i_lyfe

'Cuz Ya Gotta Have Faith

"I’m dating myself here but George Michael’s video for 'Faith.' At the beginning there is a hot girl in high heels leaning against a jukebox on one side and he’s on the other side. My eyes went to him. I thought, maybe I just want some jeans like that. Naw. I wanted what was IN the jeans."

– shakycam3

Some experimented to determine their sexuality.

Trying Oral

"Honestly? I had some doubts at first. So I let a guy go down on me during a 3some with his girlfriend. He was a freshman psychology student and had just learned about Kinsey and was making a big long speech about how sexuality is a spectrum, and nobody is truly 100% straight, and you know what? It was kind of compelling. So there I am, getting what was probably the third blowjob of my life, and I just can't stay hard. This dude was motivated, and no matter what he did... I think I was every bit as surprised as he was."

– porn0please

Best Buddy Hook-Up

"Same here. I thought, 'let’s try men, see how it goes!' Found myself hooking up with a close male friend who is, by all means, a f'kin smoke show."

"It was a safe space. I felt comfortable. And I learned - at most I’m a Kinsey 1 maybe. Maybe a Kinsey 0.5."

"If I die without ever being with another man, all good."

– astoneworthskipping

Those who were acquainted with or related to these Redditors tried to convince them of their sexuality.

Recognizing Beauty, Not Acting On It

"My sister in law was trying to convince me I was 'bisexual with a preference for men.' She wouldn’t let it go, all because I can appreciate when a woman is beautiful. I told her that I can see when a woman is beautiful, but it doesn’t mean I’m attracted to them."

Saint_Galahad

Little Closeted

"My best friend in high school was a lesbian, and was always trying to convince me that I was bi. I was like, 'lol no, I'm straight af.' Well, one night with my guy of many years, we were opening up about our kinks and- I don't know, I guess I just finally felt safe enough- but I realized I'd always kept a door closed inside of me where I knew I was also attracted to women."

"I've had way too many bad experiences in the past with female friends (who I think were actually crushes) to actually ever think about dating a woman, but I'm definitely also sexually attracted to them."

– Dizzy_Duck5436

Impressions made from a certain age can't be forgotten.

Kindergarten Crush

"When I went to kindergarten round-up when i was 5, I remember seeing two very pretty girls and thinking I would like to kiss them. To be honest, 35 years later those two women are still very pretty and I would still like very much like to kiss them."

– 2aboveaverage

The Handsy Child

"I remember falling in love with my first grade teacher. Ms. Florence. It has always been ladies for me. I read these modern discussions where people are debating sexuality, and it just doesn’t compute. My Grandpa told stories about me putting my hands down women’s shirts at age two/three."

– momentum_1999

My elementary teacher's assistant was a high school student named Randy.

He was the first guy I couldn't take my eyes off of.

He was a redhead, had freckles, and stunning green eyes that looked deep back into mine whenever I pretended I had a question for him but fumbled with my attempt at small talk.

I recognized him as a beautiful man but I didn't understand why I gravitated toward him as I was years from having any kind of sexual comprehension or awakening as a ten-year-old.

But I know for certain that was when I realized I was "different" when I pined for him and wanted to be near him every time I went to school.

I wonder what Randy is up to now?

Do you sometimes think about the people from your past you've had crushes on?

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