Sometimes it is just that easy to make people happy. This is a lesson learned over and over in our lives, but that's because it's an important one.
Actor Miriam Margolyes shared how she learned to change her behavior to make others happier. Margolyes appeared on The Graham Norton Show recently and brought up a fairly polarizing subject in the United Kingdom: trans people.
The 84-year-old actor, known for her extensive career in stage and film, is perhaps more importantly recognized by most younger generations as Professor Sprout in the Harry Potter movies. Her thoughts diverge wildly from the widely-known transphobe author of Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling.
In the interview, Margolyes reflected on her own growth relating to and talking with trans people, saying that while she supports trans' people's right to self determination, she had struggled with using "they/them" pronouns in the past, citing a love of grammar precision as the reason why.
She explained:
"I was very keen on grammar, and so when people started talking about pronouns and that they wanted 'them' and not 'he/she,' I thought, 'What the f*ck are you talking about?' It's clear, it's grammar."
However, a pivotal conversation changed her mind. She credits actor Zoe Terakes, who uses they/them pronouns, with helping her shift her worldview and the subsequently her actions, on the subject.
Margolyes did misgender Terakes when quoting them, using "she" pronouns, but the spirit was there.
"'What does it matter to you,' [they] said, 'if you can make someone happy by calling them 'they' instead of 'he' or 'she,' why not do it?'"
From then on, Margolyes said, she changed her attitude on the matter.
People pointed out that, even if Margolyes thinks that using a singular they isn't grammatically correct, it actually is, going all the way back to examples from the Bard himself, William Shakespeare.
In fact, someone said, we use it all the time without even thinking about it.
A few people were rankled by Margolyes citing Zoe Tarekas discussing trans grammar with her, while at the tame time misgendering Tarakes the entire time.
Folks recognized that Margolyes is currently in a deeply transphobic country, and offered her a way out to join her other roots, as Margolyes is British-Australian.
People gave credit where credit was due and commented on Margolyes' advanced age and how she isn't ossified in her own growth as a human.
All in all, commenters really felt her message hit home.
Margolyes most recently appeared in one of her travel specials, Miriam Margolyes Discovers New Zealand.
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