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People Divulge The Funniest Thing A Doctor Ever Said To Them

Reddit user Straight_Toe_1816 asked: 'What is the funniest thing a doctor ever said to you?'

doctor holding red stethoscope
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The saying "laughter is the best medicine" has been around for millennia. The works of Aristotle and the Talmud both make references to the concept.

The King James Bible book of Proverbs, Chapter 17, verse 22 reads “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones."

But is there any truth to the laughter cure?

According to the National Institutes of Health:

"Current research indicates that laughter has quantifiable positive physiologic benefits."

In psychiatry, Sigmund Freud postulated "humor may be the highest of the defense processes of the psyche, which we can invoke to guard against anxiety."

So a doctor who employs humor—deliberately or inadvertently—has some solid evidence to support the practice.

Reddit user Straight_Toe_1816 asked:

"What is the funniest thing a doctor ever said to you?"

JFGI

"All right, this is the part where I’m just going to Google it and we both pretend I’m not.”

~ justhangingaroud

"I love that my doctor Googles stuff in front of us, to answer questions or to show us photos of what he's talking about."

"We don't need to pretend that he is omniscient or that he just covered the topic in med school yesterday."

"It makes me more confident that he's going to give the right answer instead of guessing."

~ predditr

Congrats?

"Post exploratory biopsy following a weird MRI:"

"'Well, you're a mutant, but your super power is dumb'."

"I grew an accessory spleen."

~ BonelessMegaBat

"I have one too!"

"He’s my little buddy found incidentally during an ultrasound for gallstones, it was a lot more exciting to hear about him than the stones."

~ SillyMangoX

Ewwwww! 🤢

"Had a nasty throat and tonsil infection and went to the doctor, who looked in my throat and went 'ewww that looks gross!'."

"I said 'is that your professional opinion?' and he says 'yep! That's the grossest thing I've seen in weeks! Eww!'."

"He was a super nice doctor, and I knew he was just joking. He then gave me some nice meds and sent me on my way."

"And it really did look very gross."

~ wanderingstorm

What About Bungee Jumping?

"I had neurosurgery, and I was asking the neurosurgeon what was okay to do after surgery."

"He told me that I just couldn’t swim in a lake or take baths. Then he suggested I could go skydiving if I wanted."

"It turns out I had no activity restrictions."

"The whole surgical experience was bizarre. It was not a common procedure, so I couldn’t even look up patient information on what to expect."

"I had printed a list of questions that I wanted to ask the surgeon the day before surgery, and his answers were all I had to go on."

"I didn’t even have any idea of how long recovery would take. I actually didn’t ask that question either."

"But I think not knowing was beneficial because I got bored of recovering really quickly and got back to normal life quite fast. I’m not sure if I would have done that if someone told me it would take ten weeks to recover or whatever."

~ shakeyshake1

Finish That Thought

"I smashed my left pinky toe into a door frame, hurt like a mother. Went and got it X-rayed and yep, fractured."

"A month later, I’m at a routine podiatrist visit, and my toe is swollen, and the toenail is black. I’m explaining to the doc that I fractured it.

"He looks closely at my mangled little piggy and says seriously, 'Yeah, you’re going to lose that toe'."

"What??!!! In about 3 seconds, I went through the shock of losing a toe, acceptance of losing a toe, and determination to continue living without a toe when the doctor says…"

"'Sorry, I mean toeNAIL. You’re going to lose that toenail'.”

"Gah!"

~ DadsRGR8

The Nose Knows

"I had a conversation with a new shrink when I was 12."

"'Do kids ever bully you?' he asked."

"'Sometimes', I responded.

"'About your nose?', he said."

"'...No...', I replied."

"That was when I found out I have a big nose."

"And the world has not let me forget about it since."

~ GrizzlamicBearrorism

Bombs Away!

"My GP [general practitioner] and I got to talking about kids in general once, and he told me about his friend's son, about six years old, who didn't call his older brother by name."

"He only referred to him as, 'This f*ckin' guy'."

"I about hit the floor."

"I'd never had a doctor drop an F-bomb around me before."

~ therealmominator

And Away! 💣

"I loved some of the doctors I worked with."

"Hearing one dictating a physical exam of a geriatric neglect patient to his NP [nurse practitioner] documenting in the chart:

"'This poor guy is a f**king mess, and you can put that in the chart if you want to. That’s my professional opinion'.”

~ mokutou

S-O-S

"I was out of a coma for a few days, and the doctor asked my name, where am I, etc... then told me:"

"'you were sh*t on toast when you first got here'."

Thanks doc, that makes me feel better."

~ FunUse244

Funny Bone Functional

"I basically woke myself up from a coma and pulled out my breathing tube."

"The doctor later wanted to check if I damaged my vocal chords—can happen if you just yank the tube out."

"He checked if I was still awake and asked 'can you say something?'."

"I replied with:"

"'Something'."

"He groaned and replied 'well, at least the humor is still functioning'."

~ SkaveRat

OMG!

"My husband had an enormous inguinal hernia—a hernia that goes into the testicle."

"When his doctor saw it, he actually dropped his professionalism and blurted out:"

"'Oh my God, what is that‽‽'."

"Which is funny now, but at the time was a little bit disconcerting."

"He was genuinely shocked."

"The hernia had been percolating for a looooong time because my husband has an insanely high pain tolerance and grew up poor with no insurance."

"My husband had one testicle basically the size of a grapefruit."

"He's fine now, don't worry."

~ SoldMySoulForHairDye

Visual Humor

"Doctor didn't say anything, but I had finger surgery to have a piece of metal wire placed in my finger."

"I wake up from surgery to the surgeon being gone, but he had taped a Polaroid x-ray of my finger post-op to my hand."

"It was an amusing way to wake up."

~ Reddit

"I woke up from foot surgery with my foot wrapped and in a walking boot…with a smiley face drawn on my big toe."

~ MerrySunshine

The Chips Or The Fabric Detail?

"I asked my doctor what could cause the ridges on my fingernails."

"'Eating ruffles'.”

~ Shelikestheboobs

One Is Enough

"My wife and I had our child late in life, and knew we were going to be one and done, so a vasectomy was gonna happen."

"Where I live, you need a Dr's referral to get one."

"Coincidentally, my appointment to get said referral was the same week that I started my paternal leave."

"At my appointment, Doc walks into the room and says:"

"'You've been on paternity leave for 2 days, and you already want a vasectomy‽‽'."

~ phil_in_t_blank

Doctor's Little Helper

"My surgeon had given me a prescription for one Valium to take on the day of the vasectomy procedure if I was feeling nervous."

"So I was there in the room, no pants, the doctor comes in and asks:"

"'Did you end up taking that Valium?'."

"I hadn't, so I said 'No'."

"He shoots back with:"

"'That's okay. I took enough for both of us'."

~ Pitbullpandemonium

"During my labor and delivery, my Ob/Gyn said:"

"'I've already administered the epidural. Would you like one as well?'."

~ 214ObstructedReverie

A sense of humor can help us tackle a lot of challenges.

What's the funniest thing a doctor ever said to you?