People Break Down The Dumbest Conspiracy Theories They've Ever Heard

The things I read on the daily scare me. Then I turn on the tv and see that members of our government believe the Easter Bunny is real and science is lies. And then I get frantic. Deep breaths....

Creative Writing

"The one that states that Middle Age never happened and that 800yrs of history were just invented by the Vatican. It is actually funny how much work was done to prove this theory."

- ThatOtherFrenchGuy

Beatlemania...

"Paul McCartney dying in a bicycle accident in 1966 and being replaced by a lookalike, and that the Beatles left clues on their albums.

• So they found a guy who looks just like Paul, sounds like him, plays and writes as well as him (and better).
• John, Ringo, George, George Martin, Jane Asher, and Jim McCartney all kept quiet about this?
• The Beatles left clues in their songs and albums, for sh**s and giggles?" - square3481

Agents of the Pope

"In the new Irish exiles, however, many Protestants saw a papal plot at work. According to "Conspiracy Theories in American History: An Encyclopedia," some Protestants feared the pope and his army would land in the United States, overthrow the government and establish a new Vatican in Cincinnati."

"They believed the Irish would impose the Catholic canon as the law of the land. HistoryThe idea that Irish immigrants were agents of the Pope working to establish a Third Rome in Cincinnati is just hilarious to me."

- BohemondIV

Tartaria...

"Similarly, that there was a lost, technologically advanced global empire called Tartaria that collapsed in the mid-1800s, and for some reason it's been entirely wiped from history except for its architecture. Examples of "Tartarian" architecture include the Arc de Triomphe, old Chicago, and most late middle ages castles."

"At its core, it's similar to the Graham Hancock-style "history is lying to us" but unlike the Younger Dryas theories, which are still dumb but mostly hinge on "yeah, but we don't have evidence it's NOT true," the conspiracy requires significantly more heavy lifting to explain how none of this society survives except for a very specific and visible aspect. Check out r/Tartaria for the wildest rabbit hole you will go down today."

- blisteringchristmas

Silence

"Any of those which require an exceptionally large number of people to remain completely silent over the course of decades."

- ByzantineBasileus

Silence is part of the problem. And religion is really feeling like a hostage taker, I grew up Catholic. But there is a lot to explain.

Endings

"Every "End of the World" conspiracy. It has been said so many times, yet the world hasn't ended."

- SumthnUnreal

It's a Circle!

" Flat Earth."

- CorbuloDIY

"The one thing about flat-earth theories that has never been successfully articulated to me is: Why? What is the point of it all? Why are NASA and all the world's governments, astronauts, physicists, astronomers, cartographers, pilots, and sailors trying to trick people into believing the world is round? What do they gain from maintaining this charade, or what would they lose from its exposure? Just, why?"

- Dahhhkness

Watered Down

"As the womb is filled by water. Everyone is technically born at sea therefore only maritime law applies to them. I don't get it either."

- DucoNdona

"So they would claim a gallon of water is a sea? If I stand in a puddle I'm at sea? When I take a bath I'm at sea? I think if it can't float a vessel the size of a cargo ship, then it ain't a sea."

- PotatoProfessor

Oh the Q...

"The holocaust didn't happen. Like how are you gonna deny something with loads of witnesses, pictures, survivors etc?"

- PokerP*rn

"My sister is a hardcore QAnon type. She is adamant that the Holocaust never happened, all the pictures are fabricated, videos are all fake, etc."

- feed_me_churros

Nirvana

"Kurt Cobain faked his death and assumed the identity of Rivers Cuomo."

- morgance_lavellan

"they"

"Chemtrails. Doesn't matter what pilots, meteorologists, scientists, etc, tell them - they just think every contrail is a chemical spray 'they' use to... do something or other to us. Nutjobs."

ActiniumNugget

"They don't understand how much 'Chemical' would be necessary to get the dispersal patterns of contrails. There wouldn't be any room for passengers or fuel. I honestly thing the plane would be too heavy to take off."

Celica_Lover

"lizard people"

"Celebrities are reptiles wearing a disguise. A few years ago a lot of conspiracy theorists believed that celebrities and world leaders were a part of an organisation of 'lizard people' disguised as humans with plans to take over the world. There were so many videos of people analysing eye and tongue movements of famous people as proof that there were lizards."

RandomVampireUnicorn

'false flag operation'

"That Sandy Hook (or any other mass shooting or tragedy for that matter) was a 'false flag operation' designed so the 'government can come take your guns.' You had f**king lunatics writing books called 'Nobody Died at Sandy Hook,' which was a total slap in the face to all of the family members who lost loved ones (especially the ones who lost their little children)."

DJHJR86

Bad Egg

"Humpty Dumpty didn't fall - he was pushed.."

Back2Bach

"And they did everything not to help him! I mean, they gave the first shot at putting him back together again to the frickin' horses!"

GuardPerson

???

"Vaccine has a tracking device in it lmao. posts rant about how vaccine has a tracking device on Facebook using tracking device."

aaronsacunt

"It baffles me. Microchips that are small enough to fit through the needle of a vaccine and transmit your locations simply don’t exist yet, they do have them for dogs but the needles are much bigger. Why spend billions inventing new technology when people willingly spend hundreds buying handheld devices that do just that?"

XxsquirrelxX

Andy Tales

"Andy Kaufman faked his death in the 80s and assumed the identity of then-eccentric billionaire Donald Trump. Donald Trump was at the peak of his career and wanting to retire, and they conspired for him to vanish from public view so Kaufman could take on what he would consider his magnum opus. Kaufman (as Trump) began saying more and more outlandish things, his business ventures went sideways, he started a television show where he fired people with 'his' kids, and the real estate mogul even began selling steaks. Andy Kaufman is truly a master of acting."

IZ3820

Not Again...

"Well apparently Trump is going to take back the presidency in August. I thought it was supposed to happen this month, and the month before that, and the month before that, and the month before that, and the month before that... it's probably nothing to worry about I'm sure it'll happen this time."

Interesting_Winter52

It's real

"My dad is convinced that coronavirus doesn’t exist. Like all the people that died from it would’ve died anyways and there isn’t a virus involved."

ImSoTiredLmfao

"hints"

"That somewhere in Trump's government there was an operative releasing 'hints' to the public about ongoing investigations in to his political opponents, in an effort to prepare certain people for 'the storm' and... I can't keep this crap up. Q. Q is the dumbest crap ever, because anyone with an IQ above room temperature can figure out it's fake with a few seconds of effort."

EvidentlyEmpirical

2024

"My cousin was one of those people who thought Trump was going to become president again in March. It seems like that didn’t happen but according to her Trump actually is currently president and Biden is just there to keep the people happy. I’m curious to what she is going to say when a law she doesn’t like get passed. Or if Trump runs again in 2024."

OrangeTree81

I understand wanting to find truth and deciphering difficult questions, but some facts are just fact. How in 2021are we still debating this rotting ball's shape? The Earth is round. Period.