Probably one of the most nuanced positions a person can take is the position of being a parent, which is chock-full of decisions about how to raise a child.
One stance every parent will take is how open they are to other people's children being involved in their events, whether they planned on them attending or not. Some parents need all of the official RSVPs and will not accept additional people, while other parents will argue that all children should be welcome, no matter what.
This was a dilemma TikToker @katstickler recently faced when she and her young daughter went to play at the park, only to discover a children's birthday party was in the works.
Because there was no one else at the park, Kat's daughter, MK, naturally gravitated toward the children attending the party, and she reported in a TikTok video that they played together for approximately thirty minutes.
All seemed to be well, but then the party took a hard turn for Kat and her daughter.
Kat explained her traditional stance on mom-shaming before sharing what happened:
"I've gotta mom-shame."
"The only people I've ever mom-shamed are myself and my own mother."
"But one other mom is gonna be added to the list, because what the f**k?"
But then she shared what went wrong at the party:
"This is a question: Am I entitled, or was this messed up?"
"MK and I were at the park in my neighborhood. It was us and this birthday party group, literally just us and a birthday party."
"So MK was playing with them for, like, a half hour. They were making friends. It was nice. It was actually very cute."
"So then it's time to sing 'Happy Birthday.' MK runs over, she's one of the group now, they're welcoming her with open arms, or so I thought."
"I was wrong."
This is where Kat began to judge the other mom:
"It was time to eat cake, and I see MK. I see her intention to grab a piece of cake."
"So I walk over to make sure it's okay, as a formality. Honestly, I was like, obviously it's okay. It's a cake, it's a massive cake, and there are lots of leftover pieces!"
"But then the mother took the plate of cake away from MK and got down on her level."
"She said, 'You cannot eat this cake. This is not your birthday party. These are not your friends."
You can watch the video here:
The video rapidly went viral with more than 1.4 million likes and almost 54 thousand comments and the internet was thoroughly divided over the situation.
Some said they wouldn't give a stranger's child cake because of allergies and other concerns.
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
Others argued that they would always make sure to include children at an event.
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
Most were taken aback by the other mother's hurtful "not your friends" comment.
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
@katstickler/TikTok
While it's okay to parent in different ways and even to decide that you'll host a birthday party differently than another parent, the internet could agree that being rude to a child, especially about their ability to make friends, was deeply crossing a line.
@jaketapoer/Bluesky
@BillAckman/Twitter