Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

The All-Time Creepiest Things Kids Have Ever Said To Their Parents

The All-Time Creepiest Things Kids Have Ever Said To Their Parents

A creepy porcelain faced doll with many cracks

Kids don't say the darndest things.

They say the craziest things.

I feel like some kids are dark psychics here to throw us off our game.

But I dislike children so I could be exaggerating.

Some of the phrases and prophecies I've heard children espousing have left my head spinning.

Where do they learn this stuff?


Redditor Eli_JMI wanted to hear about the things children have said aloud that left people SHOOKETH, so they asked:

" Parents of reddit, what is the creepiest thing your child has said to you?"

I once had a kid, stop me in the mall and just point at my head and go... "BOOM! HEAD!"

Creep.

Over Him

Big Brother Reaction GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy

"My then 2 year old accidentally locked himself in a room and was crying hysterically while I tried in vain to coach him through unlocking the door. My then 5-year-old pulled me aside and said, in perfect seriousness, 'Forget about him, Mom. He's dead to us.' I'm a little worried about that kid."

Plus_Cardiologist497

In the Fire

"Not my child but my grandchild. She was about 3 years old when her parents were expecting another baby. She kept talking about how she was so happy she'll have her sister back once the baby was born. The sister that 'died in a fire before.' At the time she only had an older brother and had never had a sister, let alone one that passed away in a fire."

MaggieMews

Before

"My youngest daughter has always had a fear of the water that’s gotten better as she’s gotten older. But when she was a toddler, it would have been easier to baptize a rabid cat than try to get give her a bath. One night at around age 3, I was doing my routine of trying to get her in the tub to wash off when she said to me 'I scared of the water. It’s how I died before.' Yeah, the bath definitely didn’t happen that night."

bluegrassmommy

Wild

"My grandma used to tell this story all of the time! Apparently when I was a young kid, I saw a big blue lifted truck and began talking about how I used to drive one like that, and I had gotten into a car crash and died at a young age and talked about missing my life. Kids either have wild imaginations, or they remember some stuff from an alternate timeline."

NewToReddit4331

Bye Daddy

Excuse Me No GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy

"As I was leaving for work, my daughter said 'bye daddy, have a good day. I hope you don't get shot' and then went back to playing with her toys."

BarkingBagel

Kids know jobs are dangerous.

Think

Okaay What GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy

" Woke one morning before my alarm went off to my three year old son standing next to my bed. He then says, 'Go back to sleep and think about your life.'"

KJDub6

Dreams

"My son used to say when he was younger that he used to fly around at night. Jumping from lamppost to lamppost in the neighborhood. That it was hard to get there because of the connection to his body through the belly button."

"I would have considered imagination if it weren’t that my dad told me he had the same type of dream when he was little as did I."

felixkatz

The Watcher

"Not my kids but I used to work with toddlers."

"We had one girl who got so upset at changing time. She would cry and say 'No, the man is watching!' When she was on the changing table. She would point to the ceiling tiles (sometimes the wind from the garden door knocked one out of place) and say he was watching."

"Freaked all of us staff out, we all looked but there was definitely no one there. We had to change her on a mat on the floor inside of a stall because she was so upset. We did that for the rest of the year."

"The next years class starts... A little boy (these kids did not know each other at all!) starts crying on the changing table. 'No! The man is watching!' Pointing at the ceiling tiles again. Same situation for the rest of the year. Had to change him in a stall on the floor."

"There was never anyone in the ceiling but it freaked us all out constantly!"

moonchild_86

Oh Timmy

"We were living overseas and the area we lived in had been an old Chinese fishing village. Locals were superstitious about the area because the village had been removed to replace with modern housing and it was supposed to have made the spirits angry. My 5 year old son had an imaginary friend named Timmy but he didn't actually like Timmy. He complained about him so much it got creepy."

"For instance, Timmy didn't like certain people... Timmy told him to misbehave... anything that was misplaced was lost because Timmy took it, etc. I joked that at least we knew Timmy wasn't a ghost because a Chinese kid would not be named Timmy. One day my son drew a picture of Timmy to show me. He labeled it 'Tai Mei.'"

NinaNina1234

Stick with Chicken

Wait What Sudden Realization GIF by Nick JonasGiphy

"Went to check on my five year old daughter who was asleep. She rolled on her back, still asleep, and said, 'I must not eat humans, humans aren't food.' Before rolling back over."

tiredandstupid82

Kids are crazy. Thank the Lord I don't have any of my own to terrorize me like this.

Do you have any crazy kid-related stories? Let us know in the comments below.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Screenshot of Nancy Mace; Charlie Kirk
The Daily Caller; Nordin Catic/Getty Images for The Cambridge Union

Nancy Mace Ripped After Using Transgender Slur To Refer To Charlie Kirk Killer

South Carolina Republican Representative Nancy Mace was fiercely criticized following the assassination of far-right activist Charlie Kirk when she used a slur to reference the rumored gender identity of the killer, who has yet to be identified by authorities.

Since Kirk's killing on Wednesday, Mace has erroneously claimed that rhetoric from Democrats is responsible for Kirk's death—and now she's taken the opportunity to once again attack transgender people, saying with no evidence whatsoever that "the shooter was a tr*nny, or pro-tr*nny."

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Stephen Colbert
CBS

Stephen Colbert Makes Somber Plea To Americans In Wake Of Charlie Kirk's Death

Late-night host Stephen Colbert had a somber message for Americans as he addressed the assassination of far-right activist Charlie Kirk, stressing that "political violence only leads to more political violence."

Kirk died after an unidentified gunman shot him in the neck as he—ironically enough—mocked victims of gun violence at an event in Utah Valley State University. Kirk's murder has galvanized the far-right, with President Donald Trump and his surrogates claiming without evidence that rhetoric from Democrats is responsible for Kirk's death.

Keep ReadingShow less
a woman sunbathing on rocks.
a person sitting on a towel on a beach
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

People Share The Weirdest Flexes They Heard Someone Say With A Straight Face

It is never attractive to gloat.

Even so, some people can't help but brag, or "flex" as it is sometimes known, about certain accomplishments or attributes.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots from @thedowntheredoc's TikTok video
@thedowntheredoc/TikTok

TikToker Hilariously Calls Out Target After Champion Pants Feature Awkwardly-Placed Front Pleat

Sometimes you can just tell when something was designed *for* women, but was not actually designed *by* women.

Take, for instance, the new pleated pants available at Target from the Champion clothing line. While there's nothing wrong with pleated pants and they certainly have a suitable spot in the workplace, the latest rendition of Champion pleated pants are, shall we say, NSFW.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots from @kaicutch's Instagram video
@kaicutch/Instagram

Woman Flips Her Car After Belting Out Ironic Britney Spears Lyric In Wild Viral Video

Whether we want to admit it or not, we've all had our fair share of carpool karaoke and maybe even imagined our car as our own personal recording studio.

But TikToker and Instagrammer Kaitlynn McCutcheon may have gotten too into her performance of Britney Spears' classic, "Hit Me Baby, One More Time," when the road and her car both said, "Bet."

Keep ReadingShow less