Unwritten Workplace Rules That Newcomers Learn The Hard Way

There are basic rules when at work.

Rules so basic they don't even need mentioning... until they do.

For some reason, not everybody comprehends simply good and bad behaviors.

This is why I love working from home.

The only co-worker I argue with is my dog.

And she is dramatic enough, believe me.

Certain people have to be hand-held or thrown into the fire.

Learning by fire is the majority of life.

There really is no time for hand-holding.

Learn as you go is seems to be the way.

Redditor DLawlight wanted to discuss what work lessons were forged by fire, so they asked:

"What’s an unwritten rule at your workplace that newcomers learn the hard way?"

Lips Together

"I work at a sewer plant. Breathe through your nose."

"Sure, it stinks sometimes, but sometimes it splashes, too. So keep your lips tight."

- ginger_whiskers

"Like plunging the toilet, except cranked up to 11."

- anteaterKnives

smell GIF Giphy

Good Morning!

"Do not ask Mark about how his weekend was."

"You'll get a step-by-step description of everything that he did, and all of the ways that his kid and step-kids annoyed him during that step. You can easily get stuck with him for over an hour."

"Frankly, even saying 'good morning!' is a bit of a risk."

- LycanIndarys

Stay Quiet

"Don’t tell anyone anything ever that you don't want the entire dept to find out about immediately."

- babamoomoo

"This made me laugh. One of my colleagues had a minor fall with no injuries. My supervisor decided to do a risk assessment of the site. All 2500 staff discussed it via emails and meetings for 6 weeks. As soon as it was wrapped up with the conclusion that he just needed to watch where he was going, he fell again. So now we are going through the process again. No one gets to just move on from an embarrassing moment. The same goes for gossip, I know so much about people that aren’t even in my department."

- Automatic-Mess-2203

Too Much 411

"You don't need to give me sh*t excuses when you call in sick, I really don't care, just tell me you're not coming in, I don't need to know more."

- TapeDeckSlick

"My dog fell down the stairs and slid into a can of paint, and the paint spilled down the floor drain, which drains into the river, and the EPA came and arrested my dog, and I need to take out a bank loan to bail him out, but the bank is closed until noon cause they got robbed."

- mtbmike

"Many years ago, I was a supervisor for a team of about 15 people. This was my #1 rule. I told them to just call and tell me that they needed a night off and how they wanted me to record it – sick day, PTO, etc."

"Everyone needs a day off from time to time. Don’t feel like you have to win an Oscar every time you need a mental health day. Or if a last-minute ticket becomes available for a concert you’d love to see (that actually happened)."

- ilikemrrogers

Toe the Line

"James, the supervisor is way more strict about things like swearing or being on your phone, especially if you're new. Every new person thinks James dislikes them and is targeting them. Once you prove you're competent, James is actually cool as hell and is way more willing to go to bat for employees against upper management/corporate than the other supervisors."

"So the rule is, toe the line with James when you're new; it's not like this forever."

- pollyp0cket*ussy

DAMAGES

"STOP PROMISING THE CLIENT DEADLINES WITHOUT CONSULTING ME!!!"

"IT'S NOT GONNA GET DONE AND YOU'RE DAMAGING OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THE CLIENT!!!"

- Baranix

Hell Yeah Damages GIF Giphy

Slow Down

"The more you hurry to do your job quickly, the more expectation there will be on everyone else to do their job at the same pace."

"I have 40 years remaining on the job market; this is a marathon, not a sprint. Your body will quit you early unless you slow down."

- IHateTheLetterF

"Had a new guy get all hot and bothered about filling wheelbarrows fast 'to make a good impression.' I asked him if he was going to be "making a good impression" for the next 8 hours or if he would be burnt out and leave me to load alone. He slowed down after that."

- MoistyBoiPrime

9-5

"Working after hours and calling others. I do InfoTech, and I expect it, depending on the client's needs, but people often forget boundaries. If you say 'let's discuss this Monday morning, or can we talk about this 9-4 m-f,' it helps train them to respect normal hours."

"New Managers, dispatchers, office staff, and field staff all need to learn to work within business hours. Working late/all hours doesn't help productivity, or it seems like you have time management issues."

"It's a behavior that needs to be fixed asap. I just text, is this critical or can we wait till tomorrow, I'm with family. Most of the time, they figure it out or wait because it's not important."

- carcaliguy

Be Serious

"Teachers - the Students are not your friends or buddies. You are the adult, and you are their teacher. When it comes time for a consequence, they will not take you seriously."

"Also, for those that bring in candy and snacks and think it is a one-and-done to bribe them to do work because everything else has failed, it is not. They expect the candy every time and leave trash everywhere. The mentality is 'if you do this, I will give you that,' never works."

- CuteAsparagus9883

Toi, Toi, Toi...

"Don’t wish anyone good luck, ever. If they are dancers or French, it’s merde. If they are German or vaudeville, it’s toi toi toi. If they are circus performers or Italians, it’s en boca di lupo. If they are actors or English-speakers, it’s break a leg, but don’t you dare wish that on the dancers or the circus performers, because they might. And if you’re performing with ice skaters all busily yelling “good luck!” at each other, just pretend you don’t hear it."

- UnkindEditor

Oh, Tim

"Wait at least 10 minutes after Tim’s done in the toilet."

- InsertLongUsername

"This is Tim. I'm never 'done.'"

- sheetskees

Not one bit...

"If you work hard and show competence, you get more work."

"There are favorites, and management picks and chooses who they prioritize for punishment over things like attendance, the technicalities of the job, etc."

"The company does not care about you, one bit. They will have you die, and not even stop the building."

- ballskindrapes

Survival

"The training you will go through is some of the worst training I have ever seen. It would be more effective if there were no training period and people had to just do the job and figure it out. No matter how hard you complain, they will make you the problem. Just survive training, and we will show you what you need to do."

- BinaryChickens

Eddie

"We had a member like that, we called Eddie the Eagle. He would latch onto you like a tick and not let go. As soon as he walked in, we let everyone know 'The eagle has landed' so they could avoid him."

"There was also a woman who did the same at another place I worked, which was even worse. She lived in an assisted living home a few blocks away. She'd spend hours just wandering around, telling everyone how horrible her life was. Every family member she had, including two husbands and several kids, died in terrible ways."

"We thought it would be nice to have her win a cake from the bakery in a weekly drawing we had, so we rigged it so she won. It was a huge mistake. She bawled her eyes out for over an hour. It was the best thing that had ever happened to her in the past 15 years. She couldn't eat it, though, since she was diabetic."

- Marine__0311

Play Nice

"Don't talk s**t about your colleagues. It's taken us years to have a positive, collaborative team, and you're not going to last if you try to f**k it up."

- galacticprincess

Happy Season 5 GIF by The Office Giphy

This is all good advice.

Basically, go to work, do your job, and be nice.

Why do people make it so difficult?

People have to be so extra.

And extra isn't always a good time at work.

We're all just trying to get through the day.

Also, good hygiene, please!

THAT is rule #1!

These lessons can be learned the easy way.