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People Share Their Funniest 'I'm Dating A F**king Idiot' Experiences

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grayscale photo of woman covering her face with her hand

Sometimes, in order to find the love of our lives, we have to explore what's out there.

Often encountering people who we know fairly early on are just not a good fit.

In some cases, they're perfectly nice people but don't ignite the spark in us and lack any kind of chemistry.

Then there are those who truly astound us, and not in a good way.

The sort of people where describing them as "not the sharpest knife in the shed" would be an understatement.

Sometimes, this is clear from the minute we meet them. Other times, the realization comes a bit later.


Redditor Known-Pop-8355 was curious to hear stories of people how people discovered they were dating someone who might not score particularly high on an IQ test, leading them to ask:
"People of Reddit, what was your “I’m dating a f*cking idiot” moment?"

Oh, Dear...

"Watched a doc that explained how sharks have electricity receptors which they use to hunt. he said 'that's not possible'."

"Sharks are supposedly millions of years old but we only invented electricity a hundred years ago'."- Key-Lie250

If You Have To Prove It...

"He thought the outlet plug covers (for childproofing) meant the outlet was out-of-order."

"He literally had nothing plugged into the walls of his entire living room."

"He also mentioned how smart he was any chance he got.... usually a prime indicator."- Airport_Fart

It's Certainly A Hustle. HOWEVER...

"He kept applying for jobs and getting denied instantly."

"At the time, I didn’t understand and was upset for him."

"Come to find out, this 26-year-old was applying for jobs driving armored trucks for banks."

"With a record for stealing money from cash registers."

"I didn’t know at the time that he had ever been arrested, but this man literally had robbery and theft on his record, and couldn’t understand why an armored truck company wouldn’t hire him."- cathherine

When It Rains, It Pours...

"My ex didn't think it rained over the ocean because there was enough water there already."

"She was shocked it rained when we were on a cruise."- 1_disasta

Let's Hope She Didn't Test This Theory...

"How alcohol content percentage works."

"We argued for months that 10% as alcohol content remains the same even if you halved the bottle."

"She said nope, if you halved the bottle then the alcohol content would be 5%."

"Engineer graduate that too."

"She works for a software firm."

"For 12 years."

"Sigh."- baboyadobo

Some People Just Don't Grasp The Concept Of Math...

"My ex thought he could play hockey and found what he thought were the holy grail of skates."

"He bought them for $200 (I don't know the price as it was a long time ago)."

"His friend, who lived in a city an hour and 20 minutes away, told him he got the same skates for $195."

"So my ex, in his old Camaro that cost $50 in gas round trip, returned the skates he got for $200 and drove 1 hour and 20 minutes to get the skates that were $5 cheaper."

"That should have been the biggest red flag."

"But sadly, it turned out I was the f*cking idiot who stayed with him for a few more years."- Flipgirlnarie

"I had to explain to a grown woman that 20% is not always $20 when converted to currency."- DahvRom

Double Whammy...

"Was just lounging about one Sunday and skiing came on the TV."

"At one point the commentator said that contestants reached 100 km/h at that point in the race."

"The ex literally shouted bullsh*t at the telly."

"I looked at her and asked why..she replied that there was no way that they could tell how far they'd go in an hour since the race was only two minutes long."

"Another time, 'I have an aunt who lives in London, is that near England'."- Allydarvel

One Step Behind

"I introduced him to my stepsister."

"He said, 'weird, you guys look nothing alike'."- Saminotsammy

Get Out Of My Kitchen!!!

"He was trying to make cookies and kept opening the oven for extended periods of time, letting out all the heat."

"When I told him he was letting all the heat out by opening the door wide open and staring at the cookies, he told me I didn't know how ovens work because the temp setter said 400 so it was 400."

"Took an hour to bake 1 sheet of cookies and said 'I don't know why it's taking so long'."

"Also insisted on doing this on Thanksgiving, tying up my oven and was pissed off when he found out the turkey would take 3hrs to cook."

"As I'm sure you can imagine... Did not work out."- pocket4129

Liking Them Doesn't Make You One Of Them...

"It was when vampire-related shows and movies were in the height of their popularity."

"He became obsessed with vampires."

"When we would go outside, he started to act like the sun was hurting him, and he would shield his face with his hands while groaning in pain."

"Think of Jim from The Office with his vampire prank... only he was more dramatic... and serious."- not-a-real_username

Some Like It Hot...

"When he left the window open in the middle of summer because the air conditioning made the house too cold."

"He didn’t turn off the air conditioner and argued that it wouldn’t have made a difference."- Lovable_Minion

Dogs Do Love Car Rides...

"I went on a couple dates with a woman who owned two large energetic dogs."

"When she bought them she was informed that she'd need to walk them every day to get them exercise and burn off energy."

"To save time, instead of walking them she'd take them for a drive and thought that accomplished the same thing."- diiejso

So Much For Going Green...

"We drove past a windmill on a windy day."

"She commented how it was too windy out and they should turn the windmill down."

"She was dead serious..."- ink4n3

Washington And Jefferson Do Look Sort Of Alike... Don't They?...

"She found a coin in the couch and exclaimed 'WOW this is a REALLY big nickel'

"To which I responded 'That's because its a quarter'."- 404-soul-not-found

As Forest Gump once said, "stupid is as stupid does," so intelligence doesn't always go hand in hand with kindness and generosity.

Nor can we be too sure that these instances are what ultimately led to these relationships coming to an end.

Though, one can't blame someone for dumping anyone who thought they'd turned into a vampire...

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