We're living in an age where single people more time scrolling through dating apps and chatting with strangers than engaging with them in person.
And while they think they know enough about a prospective date based on their chat history, finally meeting up with them on a first date can still come with a variety of surprises.
One of two things can happen.
Either love seekers strike immediate chemistry or they find that the person with whom they shared a love connection online turns out to be a major misconnection.
Curious to explore what doesn't work on a first date for strangers online, Redditor hometattoo asked:
"What is your first date dealbreaker?"
Some people don't understand the art of conversation.
So One-Sided
"Bad conversation when you feel like getting more than a 2 word answer out of them is like pulling teeth."
– Thealmightyfug
Conversation Hog
"When they try to dominate the conversation and make everything about themselves while cutting you off."
– Alteredego619
Worst Top 5
"I went out with a girl who asked me if I had done something like, for example, surfed in Hawaii. I said 'no,' then she went on to tell me about what she did for about 20 minutes. Then another question, followed by another 20-minute story. Went on like this for a while till I lied and said 'yeah.' I started to make up a story when she cut me off and started another story. Top 5 of my worst first dates."
– babe_ruthless3
When phones are more interesting than you, it's time to move on.
Games
"Playing on their phone."
– bumliveronions
*clash royale intro plays*
– tykkebellis
Taking The Call
"Many years ago before the advent of smartphones I had a date with this lady who 5 minutes into dinner got a phone call and then proceeded to spend the next 1.5 hours talking on her phone and ignoring me. So I ate my food tossed 20 on the table and left."
– SomeRandomUser00
Because Priorities
"Playing with phone, cutting me off mid-sentence, saying one word responses like 'ok', 'cool', 'nice.'"
– globroc
These Redditors prefer dating someone who doesn't have kids.
Unexpected Company
"she brings her 3 kids that she failed to tell me about."
– TrailerParkPrepper
"Or bringing 23 relatives to test their generosity."
– color178924
No Single Moms Please
"Yep, it happened more than once. I am a childfree man, and they knew before the date. For the first date, I always prefer a short coffee meet."
"If it is one on one, I cover the bill. When they brought the kids, I always told the waitor to split the bill."
"They always got pissy, were offended, and of course, when I told them that I am not interested, since they knew that I did not date single mothers, they showed their true colours. Vile, toxic, and very vengeful, too."
"It explained why they were single mothers and why those kids were f'ked."
"I tried dating single mothers. 5 times to be exact. It never ended well, and it was never because of the kids."
"3 times they returned to the ex, and twice I was a placeholder holder for the guy they wanted to date, and they waited until he was available."
"I am done getting attached to the kids just to get f'ked over."
"Massive deal breaker now are the kids."
"They also always wanted to get back together with me. After, surprise, surprise, did not work out with the guys they chose. The typical, without fail, manipulation tactic was using their kids, how they miss me, ask about me, and the walk down the memory lane, about nice times we had."
"I always told them they should have thought about it when they decided to break up with me and to never contact me again. I was called a heartless -shole who would die alone because I didn't allow them to manipulate me, and their bullsh*t left me cold."
– The_Story_Builder
Not Part Of The Deal
"Kids are my deal breaker too. I am not about to be a stepmother and I am not interested in dating someone who has kids ... I just don't want it. People should disclose before a first date that they have children.. I just think it's common sense imo. Not everyone wants to be a step-parent."
– kathyanne38
My first date dealbreaker was embarrassingly shallow, but here goes.
Years ago before the advent of Grindr, I met up with a guy I've been chatting with on match.com.
He was a tennis player. Really good-looking, tall dude. We met up for coffee and had a great conversation. Because we were hitting it off, we decided to continue our first date by taking a walk through Washington Square Park since it was a beautiful day and we were right there.
On the way there, I noticed he kept leaning into me as we were walking. I asked him sarcastically if he was trying to nudge me in the direction of his apartment.
That wasn't it. He nervously laughed and told me his left leg was slightly shorter than the other leg, which caused him to walk diagonally sometimes as his weight wasn't equally distributed in his gait.
There was no second date. I know. I loathe myself for having been that vapid at the time.
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