Perhaps the biggest lie I was personally told about adulthood was that it would be miserable. Don't get me wrong, it's been hard at times. But miserable? Far from it. I'd say I prefer being an adult to being a minor. In fact, I believe my life pretty much improved from the age of eighteen onward. This isn't to say that there haven't been ups and downs. The freedom I've enjoyed during my adulthood cannot be matched, however, and I wouldn't trade that for anything.
After Redditor Chapter1 asked the online community, "What the biggest lie that parents tell kids about being an adult?" people weighed in with their own experiences.
To which this person replied...
This is the one. Not just because of the opportunity gap but mostly because of the way it imbeds in the subconscious that if you didn't become that thing it's because you didn't want it enough. The system's blameless.
"This may be specific..."
This may be specific to Indian parents but we're told that "all you have to do is study hard till 12th grade, the rest of your life will be smooth sailing."
fluffymarshmallw
To which this person replied...
I'm Indian and will kind of stand by this. Studied hard in high school, got into a good college with a large scholarship. Was able to do well in college fairly easily because I had a good foundation so then I got into a good medical school. At that point there's quite a bit more work to do to get a job you want in a good location but you're basically financially set unless you majorly mess up.
"It's important..."
You have to be everyone's friend and be kind to everyone
It's important to be respectful but if someone's got it out for you, whatever. You don't owe anyone anything.
To which this person replied..."
I'm convinced that they teach some of these things not because they're positive moral lessons, but because they make a room full of kids easier to manage.
For example: what was up with sharing?
As an adult, I'm under no obligation to let my neighbor borrow my lawn mower. It's always nice to do him a favor, but if he has a history of breaking my stuff, it only makes sense to refuse. So why do we teach kids differently? Why did my mom make me share my action figures with my little sister, when all she'd do was contort them into gymnastics poses that would snap their limbs off?
"Not specifically about..."
Not specifically about being an adult, but when I was wedding dress shopping, my mom went momzilla at one point and, completely unprompted, said something about how my wedding day would be the last day I'd ever feel like a princess and it just sounded like she was being super cynical about marriage. I have no idea where that came from because my husband spoils me in little ways all the time, and my dad is such a huge sweetheart so I can guarantee that he still treats her like a princess after 30+ years of marriage.
To which this person replied...
I don't mean to be judgmental, but I think the issue is that you appreciate being treated like a princess, when it happens, but you don't feel that you need or specifically deserve special treatment.
Your mother, on the other hand, appears to have internalized that need to be treated like royalty, and thus exists in a state of constant, low-key resentment.
"That you'll..."
That you'll understand [something] when your older.... You don't understand anything. Life just gets more confusing.
To which this person replied...
When my parents used that line, I thought that when I was older, I'd understand life's great mysteries. But in hindsight, it was probably for mundane stuff that they weren't comfortable explaining to a six-year-old.
To which this person replied...
Ahahahaha. I'll take my boring job and paying bills over the ruthless bullying and abusive school system (even the adults don't treat autistic people very nicely in many places.. yaaaaaaaay) any damn day of the week. Don't miss high school.
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