Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

In 45 Seconds, Jimmy Kimmel Perfectly Dramatized Republicans' Threat to Shut Down the Government, and It's Kind of Sad

In 45 Seconds, Jimmy Kimmel Perfectly Dramatized Republicans' Threat to Shut Down the Government, and It's Kind of Sad
ABC

Sad but true.

Jimmy Kimmel once again brought the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP) to the public's attention––this time during a segment of "Barista Theatre" while hosting his late night show. CHIP, a program which covers about 9 million children whose parents usually earn too much to qualify for Medicaid, but not enough to afford private health insurance, has been jeopardized ever since Congress failed to secure funding in October.

"Funding for CHIP should have never been allowed to run out in the first place,” Kimmel said during a monologue last night. “This is a program that is supported overwhelmingly by both parties, Republicans and Democrats, and all [House Speaker] Paul Ryan and [Senate Majority Leader] Mitch McConnell had to do was put it up for a vote, it would’ve been a done deal. But they decided to use it as a bargaining tool instead.”


To explain the current status of CHIP, Kimmel acted out a sketch with an actor who played a Starbucks barista. The scenario––it couldn't be any clearer––became the equivalent of ordering a cappuccino and getting “one giant bag of horse shit" with it.

THE BARISTA: It’s kind of a two-for-one thing. If you want the cappuccino, you also have to pay for a giant bag of horse shit.

KIMMEL: But what if I just want the cappuccino?

THE BARISTA: Whoa, buddy! If you start making demands like that, I will shut down this entire coffee establishment.

“The bottom line is, if they [the Republicans in power] want to fund CHIP, which they say they do because they care about children, they could do that immediately,” Kimmel said afterward. If they took a vote on CHIP alone, there’d be no votes against it. But they want to use children’s health as leverage.”

Kimmel pointed out that President Donald Trump's tweet yesterday about CHIP's status is one of the president's “weird occasional flashes of common sense.”

The problem? Trump “happens to be correct but it also happens to be the exact opposite of what the White House said yesterday.”

Kimmel had harsh words for Republicans who opted to lump CHIP in with their spending bill. “It’s been 100 days since it expired, it’s very scary for parents,” he said. “Funding for CHIP should never have been allowed to run out in the first place. This is a program that’s supported overwhelmingly by both parties, Republicans and Democrats.”

He noted: "All Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell had to do is put it up for a vote, it would have been a done deal. But they decided to use it as a bargaining tool instead.”

House Republicans have contended with considerable ire since their announcement that a six-year CHIP extension would be attached to the spending bill. As The Daily Beast reported:

Their bill didn’t include protections for so-called DREAMers—the undocumented minors brought to the country illegally—making it difficult for Democrats to support it. But by adding CHIP, Republican lawmakers were essentially daring those on the other side of the aisle to vote against the measure and, in turn, be blamed for not wanting to save a bipartisan health care program for poor children.

A Republican congressional aide who spoke to Daily Beast reporters on condition of anonymity says the move is part of a long game to force Democrats to "eat their words."

After Democrats slammed Republicans for not caring about sick children for months, the GOP is turning the tables on Democrats with the government funding package with CHIP provisions,” the aide said. “Democrats are faced with a choice to eat their words or support a Republican vote.”

More from News

Sydney Sweeney
Phillip Faraone/Getty Images for W Magazine

Sydney Sweeney Could Face Charges After Hanging Bras On Hollywood Sign Without Permission

Legendary and controversial showman P.T. Barnum has been credited with saying, "Any publicity is good publicity." Of course, Barnum was operating in the 1800s when he could shape the narrative and kill damaging news.

In the digital age, publicity can quickly reach a global audience. Any missteps or poor choices are out there before damage control can be done.

Keep ReadingShow less
Glenn Close; Donald Trump
Stephane Cardinale - Corbis/Corbis via Getty Images; Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images

Glenn Close Offers Dire Warning To Trump Over His Regime's 'Inhumanity' In Powerful Video

Film legend Glenn Close shared her feelings on President Donald Trump and his regime's "inhumanity" in a viral video on Instagram, saying she felt "compelled" to speak out in the wake of the murder of 37-year-old ICU nurse Alex Pretti by ICE agents on Saturday in Minneapolis.

Close—best known for starring in such classics as Fatal Attraction and who recently received raves for her work on Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery—condemned the "cold-blooded murder of American citizens" and warned Trump that "there will be hell to pay" as more and more people rise up against his leadership.

Keep ReadingShow less
Gavin Newsom; JD Vance; Tom Cotton
Justin Sullivan/Getty Images; Jim Watson/AFP via Getty Images; Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images

Gavin Newsom Epically Rips JD Vance And MAGA Senator Over Their Hot Takes On Minneapolis Shootings

California Governor Gavin Newsom criticized Vice President JD Vance and Arkansas Republican Senator Tom Cotton after they both posted heartless remarks about the recent killings of Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti by ICE agents in Minneapolis.

Earlier this month, ICE agent Jonathan Ross killed Good in her car. Department of Homeland Security (DHS) spokesperson Tricia McLaughlin claimed Good “weaponized her vehicle, attempting to run over our law enforcement officers in an attempt to kill them.”

Keep ReadingShow less
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez; Kristi Noem
Andres Kudacki/Getty Images; Al Drago/Getty Images

AOC Goes Nuclear On Kristi Noem For Suggesting That Protesters Who Show Up With Firearms Deserve To Die

New York Democratic Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez called out Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem's hypocrisy after Noem responded to the murder of 37-year-old ICU nurse Alex Pretti by ICE agents in Minneapolis by claiming that protesters who show up with firearms aren't "peaceful."

Calls for an investigation have intensified from across the political spectrum after analysis of multiple videos showed ICE officers removing a handgun from Pretti—whom authorities said was permitted to carry but was not handling—before fatally shooting him.

Keep ReadingShow less

People Describe The Strangest Health Conditions They've Ever Experienced

The human body is complicated, fascinating, and sometimes difficult to explain.

While we know that, it's incredibly unnerving when we have a symptom that even our doctors struggle to explain or identify.

Keep ReadingShow less