Every marriage has its limits.
Depending on what the couple has been through together, and their beliefs, each marriage will vary in what makes it stronger and what will break it.
But what is a woman to do when she's supposed to choose between her marriage and a tattoo?
A mom, "Peyton2020," wrote into Mumsnet, looking for advice after a perplexing conversation with her husband.
Apparently she already had three tattoos when they got married, distributed between her wrist and ankle.
"Hey everyone this is my first time posting here and I'm just looking for a bit of advice."
"Me and my husband have been married for 10 years we have a 3 year old together. before we met I already had 3 tattoos on my wrists and ankle"
But when she brought up getting a fourth tattoo to represent their daughter, her husband announced ten years into their marriage that he thought tattoos were disgusting.
"Last night I told him I wanted another tattoo, which he went crazy at saying he would leave if I got another one. He said that they disgust him and that he wouldn't be able to look at me if I got one."
"The tattoo would be on my forearm and it will be roses, a stop clock and my daughters name and birth date."
Now she feels like she has a choice to make: save her marriage or get the tattoo.
"I really really want the tattoo, but if I get it I risk my marriage. I don't know what to do"
Other moms on the page were divided in their feedback.
On the one hand, the woman should have every right to do what she wants to do with her body.
"I'd get the tattoo and ditch the husband. Your body, your choice."
"Why did he marry you if they disgust him?" - Waxonwaxoff0
"He married a woman who had tattoos and now says they disgust him? Get the tattoo and lose the husband. He should love you regardless and if that hinges on something as unimportant as a tattoo, then he's a d**k." - Aderyn19
"It's your body.Would you be seen as unreasonable if you kicked off at your husband if he got fat and said he looked disgusting, you couldn't look at him, and unless he lost the weight quickly you'd leave?"
"Yes. This is the same. I have several large tattoos and have never even thought to consult my husband on getting them."
"Honestly what sort of immature man threatens to end a marriage and split up his family over a tattoo." - Amatteroftime
But on the other hand, she has been married for 10 years.
She should take her husband's opinion into consideration when making as permanent of a decision as getting a tattoo.
"I'm personally not a fan of tattoos due to how they look and the expense. Your husband has a right to an opinion but I suppose your body, your choice." - DICarter1
"It's your body and your choice."
"It's also his choice to dislike it enough to not want to be with you any longer." - TigerQueenie
"Your body your choice indeed but his choice if he wants to stay married to you if you do." - Seesawswing
"Well, does he normally tell you what to dress? If not then I feel some sympathy, I think tattoos are a bit 'dirty' (that might to do with my puritanical childhood). Also, I just don't get them. Why reclaim your skin, it's already yours."
"So, if he's normally an easy going guy who doesn't tell you what to do, I have sympathy with him. He cannot understand why you're intentionally making yourself less attractive to him."
"If he is controlling and monitors your dress and style all the time, then you have bigger problems than this argument. Don't be told what to do, but, don't get a tattoo if the man you're in a happy relationship finds them unattractive." - ShleeAnKree
Though the wife and mom still has a big decision to make, everyone was ultimately right in this situation.
It is her body, and she can do what she wants with it. But if her husband of ten years means a great deal to her, she should probably discuss this tattoo with him more and see if they can come to some sort of an agreement.
The book 1000 Tattoos: The Most Creative New Designs from the World's Leading and Up-And-Coming Tattoo Artists is available here.
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