Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Share Their Absolute Favorite Euphemisms For A Dumb Person

We're all not geniuses.

Everybody has varying degrees of knowledge and brain power.

And that is ok.

Though some of us are really lacking in any sense and every once and awhile people like to sugarcoat that fact when they call us out.

"Bless your heart."

That's a big one in the South. Means... "I like you, but Lord are you missing marbles."


Redditor MrMadJoker wanted to know the most creative ways to describe people who lack a few IQ points.

They asked:

"What's your favorite euphemism for a dumb person?"

"You're missing a few pieces of the puzzle."

Said to me from my Geometry teacher. Now I know what he meant.

And... he was right.

Cents

"I could give them a penny for their thoughts and I'd get change back."

hopefulsite126

tyler labine penny GIF by HULUGiphy

The Cells

"He's got 2 brain cells left, and they're fighting for 3rd place."

Striking_Yoghurt_690

"One more neuron and he'd have a synapse."

TxPunsterer

Bad Wheel

"The wheel is spinning but the hamster's dead."

ofsquire

"My old english teacher used to say 'I can smell the hamster burning.'"

cardew-vascular

"Bruh how u gonna do hamsters like that. Im dead 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣"

Mulberry0

YOU

"You're the reason we have warning labels."

ofsquire

"My bosses comment about my non-too bright coworker 'you can’t get mad at her- she’s the reason shampoo has directions and she probably still f**ked it up…'”

Smoopiebear

"You see? Because of me, they have a warning label."

WantToBeBetterAtSex

Hello?

“The lights are on but no one’s home.”

Lovemesomecarrots

season 1 s1 GIF by Dream Corp LLCGiphy

Ok... some of this is some good comedy.

Or Puppet...

"I'm an American, but I love when British folks call people Muppets. For a long time Europe has led the way in insult innovation, and I think it's time we caught up."

JonSnow31391

The Muppet Show Muppets GIFGiphy

Vanilla?

"Less useful than a chocolate teapot."

Pokeybumfun

"My Physics teacher used to say 'more pointless than a chocolate fireguard' whenever we had pencils that were too blunt for graph drawing hahaha."

ElegantEagle13

"German version of that is 'dumber than a piece of bread.'"

00192737292

I Like Turkey

"Shouldn't be left in charge of a ham sandwich."

accomplished_loaf

"I had a college professor who had met Gaddafi (God have mercy on him), the late dictator of Libya, and his impression was 'it would've been a shame to put that lunatic in charge of 10 chickens.'"

thefuzzybunny1

"Lol... for some reason this reminds me of Gordon Ramsay saying on Kitchen Nightmares that he wouldn’t trust a guy to run his bath, let alone his restaurant 😅."

thxitsthedepression

No Top Floor

"Your elevator doesn't go to the top floor. You're as sharp as a marble. You'd be stuck for an answer at hello (that's from Classy Freddie Blassie you pencil necked geeks)."

ferox965

"People tell me my elevator doesn't go the whole way to the top floor but I don't even HAVE an elevator."

"People tell me that too! We should go buy one~"

one_angry_custodian

Space

"My grandpa says: 'A lot of space between them ears.' Which is my absolute favorite, because a lot of people don't get it at first and just enforces the meaning."

Blobfish_Blues

Excited Aww GIF by TikTokGiphy

Not all of us are going to break IQ records. That's ok. But these descriptions are funny.

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Jelly Roll
Kevin Winter/Getty Images for The Recording Academy

Grammy Winner Jelly Roll Called Out After Giving Bizarre Excuse To Avoid Reporter's Question About ICE

Country star Jelly Roll is facing criticism after he attempted to avoid a question from a reporter about ICE after Sunday's Grammy Awards by claiming he's just a "dumb redneck."

The singer—whose real name is Jason Bradley DeFord—earned three awards on Sunday, winning Best Country Duo/Group Performance with Shaboozey, Best Contemporary Christian Music Performance/Song with Brandon Lake, and Best Contemporary Country Album for his tenth studio album, Beautifully Broken.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Kayleigh McEnany discussing "Melania" film
Fox News

Kayleigh McEnany Raises Eyebrows With Dubious Story About Her Mom Watching 'Melania' At Packed Theater

Fox News host Kayleigh McEnany—who served as White House Press Secretary during the final stretch of the first Trump administration—had people raising their eyebrows after she claimed her mother saw the new documentary Melania at a lively Florida movie theater that was "standing room only."

Melania follows current First Lady Melania Trump in the 20 days leading up to President Donald Trump’s second inauguration following the 2024 presidential election. The film was directed by Brett Ratner, who was accused of sexual harassment and misconduct by at least six women.

Keep ReadingShow less
Minneapolis anti-ICE protest
Roberto Schmidt/AFP via Getty Images

The City Of Minneapolis Just Got Nominated For A Nobel Peace Prize—And Everyone's Thinking The Same Thing

President Donald Trump isn't going to be happy to know that the editors of The Nation have nominated the city of Minneapolis and its residents for the 2026 Nobel Peace Prize, citing the city's response to Trump's immigration crackdown that has captured the nation's attention since the murders of Renée Nicole Good and Alex Pretti at the hands of ICE agents.

In a statement addressed to the Norwegian Nobel Committee, the editors noted that "while individuals and organizations have been granted this prize since its inception in 1901, no municipality has ever been recognized."

Keep ReadingShow less
Woman with her arms crossed
Photo by ᕈ O W L Y on Unsplash

People Explain Which 'Small' Social Rules They Refuse To Ever Follow

Home, work, the library, other people's homes, the grocery store; no matter where we go, there are rules and expectations.

Perhaps most of these are reasonable enough to assume everyone will follow along and do them to make the setting comfortable for everyone.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kat Dennings attends iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2025 presented by Capital One.
Jesse Grant/Getty Images for iHeartRadio

MCU Fans Concerned After Kat Dennings Reveals That Marvel Has 'Scanned' Her Likeness

When you hear that you’re getting a “body scan,” you probably assume it’s tied to a medical procedure—not that your entire physical likeness is being quietly archived for potential future use in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

But that’s allegedly what happened to MCU star Kat Dennings, who casually dropped the revelation while addressing her status in Avengers: Doomsday.

Keep ReadingShow less