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Woman Unwittingly Brags About Poaching Deer On Dating App To The One Person She Absolutely Should Not Have ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

Facebook: Oklahoma Game Wardens

Dating is a dangerous game, right? One minute, you're bragging about illegal stuff to your would-be paramour and the next it turns out they're the exact person who can get you in trouble for the illegal stuff you're bragging about!


But LOL what are the chances of that right? Turns out unfortunately high, at least if you're a certain woman from Oklahoma who bragged about poaching a deer... TO A GAME WARDEN.

Star-crossed lovers amirite?

The story, posted to the Oklahoma Game Wardens Facebook page, has quickly gone viral for it's uncanniness... and also stupidity.

Oklahoma game warden Cannon Harrison's Bumble chat started out simple enough--the standard hello, how are ya.

"Oh I'm great," the woman replied. "Just shot a bigo buck." (Which I think means "big ol' buck"?)

Harrison then asked if she killed the deer with a bow and arrow--and the woman basically admitted to using a rifle outside rifle season, giving Harrison his smoking gun (see what I did there). Violation one!

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Harrison then asked if she used a spotlight, an illegal technique where hunters shine a spotlight at deer to stun them into freezing, making them easier to kill. To which the woman replied, "Yeahhhh" because... she's literally the world's most inept criminal.

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I mean come on! Who admits to criminality to a stranger on an app?!

Even Harrison was shocked. In an interview, he told the Washington Post,

"Honestly, the first thing I thought was that it was someone who was messing with me because they knew who I was. It seemed too good to be true."

Head of the Oklahoma Department of Wildlife Bill Hale, agreed: he placed the odds of a poacher and a game warden matching on a dating app at "probably less than winning the lottery."

But even given the incredible odds, this could have gone so smoothly! I mean she even sent him photos of more illegal activity! WHO DOES THIS?!

Here's how this could've gone:

WARDEN: "Hell yeah, get him with a bow?"

LADY: "Yeah!"

WARDEN: "Cool congrats, wanna get together for venison chili and make out and fall in love and get married and live happily ever after in bliss forever?"

LADY: "Sure okay!"

That's it! That's all she had to do!

Instead she did what she did, AND told Harrison where she lives, so wardens showed up at her house, charged her and accomplices with "an illegal deer case," and collected $2400 in fines.

On social media, people were quite frankly delighted, and the jokes rolled in--all at the hunter's expense!


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Though for some, the real story here was the woman's... "creative" definition of "bigo":


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Harrison told the Tulsa World the whole thing was "kind of a bummer" especially since, "she said it was her first deer ever, too."

Just goes to show: be careful what you reveal on a dating app or the only date you'll get is a court date! (Thank you, thank you very much.)

Times change, and if you don't change with them you're likely to get left behind. That simple piece of wisdom applies to pretty much everything - up to and including the job market. It seems like a lot of older didn't get that memo, though.

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Reddit user u/GeekyKirby wanted to get something for their boyfriend for his birthday, but he said not to get him anything because it is so close to Christmas, so they decided it was time to get creative.

When asked what they bought him, u/GeekyKirby replied:

I pre-ordered him a game [Kingdom Hearts III], and bought him a shirt and a book he wanted :) ...I also filled up his living room floor with balloons...

It seems minor mischief is a common theme in their relationship:

Thank you. :) At this point, I can't really surprise my boyfriend anymore. And I try lol. Like the time I secretly put googly eyes on everything in his fridge...

Oh, and they made him this Pikachu cake. You know, nbd.

Users were impressed by u/GeekyKirby's piping skills. Also, the hate for fondant icing is real!

Nicely done and without fondant! r/FondantHate - Patiod
Today was a bad day on reddit if you genuinely want fondant to not be a thing. Just kidding. But fuck fondant, for real. - mimomusic
We over at r/fondanthate love your buttercream meme! - cherrylpk
This is one of the best things I've ever seen on Reddit! - backfromthedead
You're a very thoughtful and creative girlfriend! <3 - mediaclone
I'd have a hard time eating this, very cute. - FrontierFrance210
A meme!?!?!? On a cake!?!??!?!?!?!Now i've seen everything! - Indetermination

A few were also a bit envious.

This cake looks AWESOME, great job!
Side note: Here's hoping that 2019 will bless me with some manflesh to do nice things like this for too ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿฝ- black_heart85
Hehe this gave me a good chuckle this morning. Now wish I had a boyfriend so I could do this to them. - MidnightMadness21

Making something for someone is a great way to show them you love them.

The best birthday present I ever got was from a girl who baked me a cake secretly. So thanks for doing that for him, I know I'd feel great about it. - Levitr0n

Others have found inventive ways to use the meme as well:

Stickers:


Sculpture:

Latte Art:

Refrigerator...art...trolling?


Even An Essay:

The fact that Surprised Pikachu is still around in 2019 really speaks to its universal appeal and ease of use. People will surely keep coming up with inventive ways to use the meme.

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