April Wilde Despain—a self-described Mormon "homeschool mom" who is "not a member of or believer in the LGBTQ religion"—caused quite a stir recently when she and her husband posted a photo of their "family flag" outside their home as a response to Pride flags.
More than any year in recent memory, the bigots are really out in force this Pride Month—and it's only the first week.
But LGBTQ+ people and allies are absolutely not letting them get away with it without a fight as the bigoted Utah couple found out.
Their flag is printed with "A Proclamation To The World" so lengthy and tiny you kind of have to wonder who exactly April thinks she's reaching with her flag's message.
Anyway, April and her husband shared their "Proclamation" flag photo on Twitter.
\u201cWe heard June was the month to hang up flags celebrating our personal beliefs about gender, sexuality, and identity. \n\nSo we hung up ours!\n\n\ud83d\ude4c\ud83c\udffc\u201d— April Wilde Despain (@April Wilde Despain) 1685674437
Despain's flag was meant to be an answer to the Pride flag, but the similarities stop at the word "flag."
Because whereas the Pride flag is composed of a handful of colors, Despain's is composed of interminable prose roughly the length of Anna Karenina.
The flag is so wordy in fact that the print is too small to read unless standing a foot from it.
Vexillologists were appalled.
Clementine-Fiend/Reddit
But according to people on Twitter with a magnifying glass, their "Proclamation" is the usual far-right Christofascist boilerplate with a little extra Mormon zing.
You know, marriage is between a man and a woman and the destruction of family values will bring about God's wrath. In her Twitter bio Despain crows about being "extremely smart and amazing," but graphic design doesn't seem to be a strong suit.
Pretty much the minute Despain posted her homophobic manifesto nobody asked for, Twitter started Photoshopping it into the kind of absurdity only Twitter can muster.
Such as...
\u201cWow that's crazy\u201d— Grimpy (@Grimpy) 1685754403
\u201cWe heard June was the month to hang up flags celebrating our personal beliefs about gender, sexuality, and identity. \n\nSo we hung up ours!\n\n\ud83d\ude4c\ud83c\udffc\u201d— Microplastics Enjoyer (@Microplastics Enjoyer) 1685766481
\u201cit\u2019s beautiful!\u201d— Joey Monda (@Joey Monda) 1685751167
\u201cFixed it for you\n\ud83d\udc9e\ud83c\udff3\ufe0f\u200d\ud83c\udf08\ud83d\udc9e\u201d— Linyela (@Linyela) 1685748408
\u201cYou know I had to do it to em\u201d— Apocalypse Cowboy (COMMS OPEN) (@Apocalypse Cowboy (COMMS OPEN)) 1685783662
\u201c@SLCLunk\u201d— PSYOP Jordan (@PSYOP Jordan) 1685719606
The replies were equally amusing.
\u201c@AprilDespain The gays hate your cargo shorts way more than whatever you have written on that flag\u201d— April Wilde Despain (@April Wilde Despain) 1685674437
\u201c@AprilDespain usually flags are simple to provide a clear message that can be understood quickly\u201d— April Wilde Despain (@April Wilde Despain) 1685674437
\u201cPutting up a flag with 78 paragraphs written in 3 pt. on my front yard and then calling the police when people walk onto my lawn to attempt to read it\u201d— Kristin Chirico (@Kristin Chirico) 1685759540
\u201c@AprilDespain\u201d— April Wilde Despain (@April Wilde Despain) 1685674437
Eagle eyes noted the t-shirt worn in the Despain post featured Flight Of The Conchords—a New Zealand musical comedy duo consisting of multi-instrumentalists Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement.
Clement—also a frequent collaborator of Taika Waititi—noticed it too and reacted on Twitter.
He tweeted:
"It's sad to see members of a group that was once persecuted punching down at another that is still persecuted."
"But even the Church of Latter Day Saints has been known to update their beliefs about sexuality (noticing just the one wife in the photo)."
\u201cIt's sad to see members of a group that was once persecuted punching down at another that is still persecuted. But even the Church of Latter Day Saints has been known to update their beliefs about sexuality (noticing just the one wife in the photo).\u201d— Jemaine Clement (@Jemaine Clement) 1685782023
Naturally, after her stunt went viral Despain whined about everyone "mocking my family bc we dare to believe differently than them" when she started the whole thing in the first place for the sole purpose of being able to play victim.
Anyway, Happy Pride, April!