Everyone approaches grief and loss differently, and sometimes when we come across an approach that is very different from our own, it can be incredibly jarring. But in other cases, it can be resoundingly heartwarming and even inspiring.
Alex Ostebo recently shared on TikTok the journey she and her family had gone through since her sister Denali passed away. Her family also importantly included her sister's fiancé, who she referred to as her "adopted brother."
Her brother-in-law had recently started to build a house on his family's property, and when the foundation was nearly done, he decided to place his late fiancée's ashes in the foundation, so they could continue to grow and be together.
The family gathered for the spreading of the ashes, and just days later, a distinctly-shaped heart appeared in the concrete foundation, on the front of the house facing the street.
The mark was not caused by water and was still on the foundation, clear as day, months later.
Ostebo couldn't help but wonder:
"Could it be my sister saying she'll watch over him in his new home?"
You can watch the video here:
Some were deeply touched by the gestures...on both sides.
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
A few made jokes about the possibility of this becoming a horror movie come true.
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
Others had more practical concerns, like if her brother-in-law married one day or moved away.
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
@alex.ostebo/TikTok
The most resounding concern about placing Ostebo's late sister's ashes to rest in the foundation of the home was the possibility of her fiancé one day leaving the property, but Ostebo assured the crowd that that would not happen.
Rather, the home was being built on a large piece of his family's land, which she approximated to be about 40 acres in size. She explained that he'd gained permission to use a portion of the property to build his "dream home," so there was little-to-no concern that he would move—and even if he somehow did, the property would stay in the family.
You can watch the second video here:
Ostebo's family and her "adopted brother" seem to have an incredibly healthy relationship with grieving and loss.
In addition to placing his beloved's remains in the foundation of the home so he'd always be with her, the family also threw a beautiful wake instead of a funeral in Ostebo's sister's honor, and Ostebo also took her portion of her sister's remains in a tiny urn on a tour of Alaska, which was the last trip they had planned before she died.
While the series of videos got everyone in the comment section teared up, it certainly wasn't for the lack of celebration of love and life.
Jane Rosenberg
Jane Rosenberg
@arianagrande/Instagram
@arianagrande/Instagram