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People Explain Which Unusual 'I Need This In A Partner' Traits They Refuse To Negotiate On
There are personal rules that must be adhered to.
The older people get, the longer the list.
And the more steadfast people cling to it.
At a certain point, we have to stand in our truths for what is best for us.
I do give some leeway.
And past breathing, my list isn't long.
That's just me, though.
Redditor Competitive-Unit6427 wanted to hear about the hard lines people draw in their search for a mate, so they asked:
"What is your unconventional 'I need this in a partner' that you will not negotiate on?"
After the Loss
"As a widow, I feel like I'd need a widower. It seems like we'd both be a bit more understanding of each other."
- Paper-Successful
"This makes a lot of sense. It’s difficult for people to empathize with that sort of loss if they themselves have not experienced it."
- LyannasLament
Life Cycle Omg GIF by La Guarimba Film Festival Giphy
Footwear
"I can’t be with a man who wears pointy-toed shoes. Or boots. It’s just a gut feeling. I just can’t trust a man with witchy feet."
- KitnwtaWIP
"I feel this about men in ankle socks. I can’t explain it either, just an instant, no."
- LittleBlag
"I'm very critical of shoes. On the first date with my husband, he had a pair of black boots on that were just perfect. I knew on that day that he was the one for me. Literally love at first sight."
- Kind-Blackberry-6221
Days on End...
"I need someone who either understands and supports my need to occasionally disappear into the mountains for days on end, or will do it with me."
- QueerDendrophiliac
"My husband does this! He does solo trips for a few days at a time every few months. People think it’s weird and ask how I feel about it. My feelings are that I get the whole house to myself for a few days! And I’m the home project person in our relationship, so I can do a crazy house project while he’s gone if I’m bored. I do miss him while he’s gone. But I also enjoy living alone for a few days, since that’s a rarity once you’re married."
- CaughtInDireWood
Homemade
"Ability to make decent potato salad."
- Prestigious_Beat6310
"My potato salad is passed on from my mom and is legendary. Bacon is negotiable. The bacon grease is not. It makes the texture perfect. Also, we're Polish if that explains it to any of you."
- bearbiy
"OMG. Every year, the community I live in has a barbecue. I bring my home-made potato salad, and I dare say that my potato salad brings all the old ladies to the yard."
"I’ll let you set the wedding date."
- bight_sidle
Warriors
"They gotta be like, unquestionably an asset, not a liability in a zombie apocalypse."
- HenriettaCactus
"I have always taken pride in how I would do in a zombie apocalypse… until now. Had a plan and everything until I had a daughter with CHD and a lifelong need for medications and possibly a couple more 'minor' heart surgeries. She doesn’t stand a chance, and I would do anything to give her a chance, which will probably wind up with me getting killed."
- Allidoisgwin
"I am so prepared for this. I keep my machete sharp, and have a bicycle with lots of panniers - essential for doing reconnaissance and gathering supplies without access to fuel. It always bugs me that zombie movies rarely show people using bikes. 😅."
- quantumrastafarian
Get it Right
"I have to share my annoyance at historical inaccuracies."
- LinaIsNotANoob
"You would hate my dad. He gets so annoyed at any mention that a historical movie is HORRIBLY inaccurate. He has old guy epic movie tastes and doesn't you dare ever mention that Braveheart is a pile of horse s**t."
- One-Earth9294 
braveheart GIF Giphy
I'm OUT!!!
"As a lesbian, her parents had better know. I ain't hiding myself."
- scubaordie
"As a lesbian, I second this. I dated a closeted girl in college, and while she herself was a very sweet person, it ended up destroying us both when her parents found out. She really believed in them, and sadly, I think their reaction shook her trust in a way that will never truly recover."
"My girlfriend now is incredible and came out to her parents last year, a little before we met. They are cool and even teased her about having successfully gotten a pretty younger girl after her divorce from her older wife, which amuses me to no end!"
- Bada**Halfie
Circus Tricks
"Ok. Its kinda weird, but I find juggling hot. There's something both absolutely mesmerizing about it, and the whole being able to concentrate and focus so well is just a crazy turn on. My partner doesn't do it often, but Lord, when I catch him doing it. Mmm."
- Megnuggets
"I've been attracted to juggling specifically before, but I realised quickly it's just useless talents in general I'm attracted to. Rubik's cube solving, pen spinning, magic tricks, backflips, drawing a perfect circle freehand - sign me the f**k up."
- shes_pH7
"I'm into trick juggling and other flow arts myself, and it makes all the practice so worth it when your partner likes it and gasses you up about it. It really re-sparks the joy I find in it."
- Stormageddon346
Let's Cuddle
"Sleeping in separate rooms. I am an extremely sensitive sleeper and for the life of me cannot fall asleep if someone else is in the room. Has nothing to do with how much I love you. I still like bedtime cuddles, but once it's time to actually sleep, I need you elsewhere."
- Gemeinhardtzbrent
"I just don't understand why people are so adamant about sleeping together. Every single woman in my life talks regularly about how shitty their sleep is because their husband/bf snores or rolls around constantly, or kicks or hog the covers. I guess I just don't experience whatever warm fuzzies they get out of it. I just feel f**king tired all day after."
- isocline
Foundation of Knowledge
"I only date mathematicians."
- SweetPickleRelish
"Ha - my sister dated a lot of guys in med school and ended up going to med school. I had a habit of dating programmers and ended up programming."
"Pretty sure you would make a good mathematician!"
- WhaddaWhadda
"Kind of the same with me. They need a Bachelors of Science. Really, I’m looking for someone with an above-average understanding of Biology, Chemistry, Physics, Stats, and Calc, so I know they have a solid foundation of knowledge and the way the world works."
- Palmzi
CHIRP OFF
"Guys, this was supposed to be unconventional."
"For me, it's a fear of birds."
"What a freaking turn off it is to feel your man flinch while making out because a bird in a cage chirped."
- Accomplished-Hotel88
Incomplete
"Left my last girlfriend because she didn't completely open up anything... I hate having that tin foil cover under the lid of the sour cream. It's now a requirement, and the first thing I ask about anybody I date."
- W0ndn4
"Similar but a touch different: boyfriend says I never fully close anything because, for some reason, he shakes EVERYTHING before he uses it. I’m careful to close it all now, but I’m constantly holding back the urge to ask him why he’s shaking the dish soap."
- ClearHelp9370Nah, Girl...
"Here’s something that took me well over 50 years to realize: I have to be with someone who isn’t negative. Like, if your whole persona is tearing down others, or looking for the worst. Yeah, I start to lose my mind. I’ve been told by past partners, 'Oh, you’re so easy going... You don’t care about anything.' Nah, girl... I care about a lot. But I can’t spend all effing day consumed with s**t I can’t control."
- RandyRhoadsLives
Safety First
"How they drive is really important to me. If they tailgate, have road rage, or speed up when people try to pass them, I’m out. I’ve had my life endangered too many times with men getting emotional about driving."
- Pinotnoirmidsizedcar
"Hey… mine was the same… I said it differently, but it’s the same answer."
"How someone drives is indicative of how they handle stress, the world not cooperating with their plans, and how they consider the health, safety, and mental well-being of their passengers."
"So I always say: MUST be a safe, patient, and courteous driver. Deal breaker."
- AlexLavelle
Let's Scream
"Gotta like horror movies. I spend a lot of time watching or reading horror. If we ever lived together, horror movie nights would be a regular thing. I'd be in a sexless relationship before a horror-free one."
- Dusty-Foot-Phil
Clown Frightfest GIF by Signature Entertainment Giphy
A safe driver is a must.
I am over the days of praying and breathing heavy while careening down the interstate.
I don't love birds, but I can forgive a person who fears them.
They can be a little whacky.
We really are a picky bunch when it comes to finding love.
No wonder most of us will perish alone.
I'm kidding...
Most Read
Drill Instructors Reveal Where They Get The Outrageous Insults They Yell At Recruits
Not all branches of the military still rely on the stereotypical insult yelling drill instructors seen in films.
Multiple studies found the method of "breaking down and rebuilding" was one of the least effective ways to provide training, retain recruits, and build camaraderie and esprit de corps. It also can attract and retain the wrong people for the success of the service.
It is still employed to some extent as a means to train military members to maintain calm and listen for orders in chaotic or combat situations, but has been cut back extensively.
As for the branches, their basic training is lead by:
- DI - Drill Instructor in the Marine Corps
- RDC - Recruit Division Commander in the Navy
- TI - Training Instructor in the Air Force
- DS - Drill Sergeant in the Army
So don't ask a Navy veteran about his "drill sergeant." Sergeant isn't even a rank in the United States Navy.
And soldiers are only in the Army.
The other branches have airmen, sailors, and Marines, and dislike being referred to as "soldiers." The inclusive term for all branches is either servicemembers or military personnel—not soldiers.
Reddit user Aware-Froyo3124 asked:
"Drill Instructors, where do y'all get the hilarious and most outrageous insults when screaming out recruits? Is it passed down and/or overheard then used later?"
As with most Reddit specific asks, the majority of the answers came from former trainees, however, not the trainers and didn’t really answer the question.
It mostly turned into a greatest hits list.
Multiple Sources
"Some of it comes naturally, some of it is recycled, sometimes, you get surprised by your own words."
~ myconsequences
Favorites
"My favorite, and one that actually broke me (it wasn’t directed at me but somebody in formation next to me):"
"DI: 'Did you iron your shirt?'”
"Recruit: 'Sir, yes sir!'”
"DI: 'Was it plugged in‽‽'”
"I laughed out loud. The push ups were worth it. That sh*t was funny."
~ expressadmin
"My favorite from my boot days was getting a line inspection and my TI rifles through this kid's clothes and screams, 'IT LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE WITH NO ARMS FOLDED THESE CLOTHES!'"
"It made us all laugh, but then we all got in trouble for laughing."
~ BlackChapel
Training
"My former office mate was an ex-drill instructor in the Army."
"He said drill instructor training was 50 percent physical conditioning and 50 percent learning how to f*ck with people."
~ jgroda
Tree Service
"I spoke to a former drill instructor once who said they’d yell at a tree to practice rattling off a string of demands and insults without regard to their victim’s reaction."
~ MrDickford
"And when the tree drops and gives them twenty, they graduate from DI/RDC/TI/DS school."
~ GolfballDM
Close Shave
"I had one of those electric shavers you could take in the shower way back when those were a new thing. TI did a locker inspection and said 'what the piss is this alien mothership doing in your locker, trainee‽‽'"
"I knew bringing it was a huge risk, but I also knew other trainees were regularly getting smoked for wet or dirty razors, so I figured I’d risk it. I gave my reporting statement and said it was my razor."
"In front of 139 other dudes standing silently at attention, he and I then spent the most nerve-racking two minutes of my life while I talked him through the various features."
"When he asked if I had to put shaving cream on, I told him to push the blue button. A shaving gel came out directly onto the razor, and he about lost his sh*t."
"Took an entire lap around my bed and said it was 'goddarnunbelievable to see the wonders of modern technology right here in the flesh.'"
"I thought the entire time that he was setting me up for something horrible, but he put it back and told me, 'Good inspection, trainee,' and I think my guts are still stuck somewhere up in my chest all these years later."
~ interista4jz
The Visuals
"My brother told me his drill instructor used the line, 'You’re about as squared away as a marble!'"
~ V-Right_In_2-V
"Reminds me of our RDC in Navy bootcamp repeatedly calling this one guy a soup sandwich. 'And here's [Recruit Name], whose uniform looks as good as a f*cking soup sandwich!'"
~ JessicantTouchThis
Lost
"DI: 'Where'd you park it?'"
"Recruit: 'Sir?'"
"DI: 'Where'd you park it!?'"
"Recruit: 'Sir! The recruit doesn't undetstand the Drill Instructor's question.'"
"DI: 'Your f*cking spaceship! You aren't from this planet, so where'd you park it‽‽'"
"Whole platoon lost it."
~ SarniltheRed
A Different Tune
"Navy OCS, I was in the final phase so I got to help the RDCs do inspections of newer classes. One candidate had put his belt on backwards, which is how women wore those belts. RDCs catch it, begin to question his gender identity, and one tells him to sing, 'I’m just a girl' by No Doubt."
"The candidate sang the entire song, in tune, totally nailed it. All three RDCs stood in stunned silence for a moment and the candidate passed the inspection."
~ Tundra_Pig
Childhood Development
"My favorite was, 'Trainee, why is the back of your head so flat? Did your mother not give you enough tummy time!'"
~ Sweaty-Bumblebee4055
Hulk, Smash!
"When I was in boot for the Navy, during a 'beating' (PT in the barracks while being yelled at) I grunted really loud while our RDC (drill instructor) was counting out pushups.
"He yelled 'you are not gonna turn big and green!'"
"I collapsed with laughter."
~ HONKDADDY
Fetch
"Standing at attention on the drill pad, and a f*cking jet flies over (USAF, so it's predictable), which the trainer is waiting for so he could catch someone looking at it."
"When the poor bastard did, he said to him 'go get it.'"
"'Sir?'"
"'Bring me that plane, now; go get it!'"
"Let the dude run for like 200 yards before he sent someone after him."
~ egoVirus
The Measure of a Man
"I went to Navy basic training at NTC San Diego. Our chief was inspecting racks (beds). The top of the sheet was supposed to be exactly eight inches from the end of the mattress."
"He's walking around checking everyone’s rack with a ruler and he asked one guy, 'Son, does that look like eight inches to you?' Then he says, 'If that’s eight inches, my d*ck’s a foot long.'"
"It’s been almost 40 years, and I still laugh about it."
~ Panda_monium109
That's a Fortunate Coincidence
"Recall at the end of basic training an informal gathering between the recruits and the Drill Sergeant."
"The DS said 'we're at the end now, so you don't have to call me Drill Sergeant anymore. You can call me by my first name.'"
"Naturally we asked him what his first name was."
"Deadpan look, 'it's Drill.'"
~ z1-900
Apology Accepted?
"After one of my soldiers said something REALLY dumb I made him walk over to some plants and apologize for wasting the oxygen they worked so hard to produce."
~ armedandfriendly
Across the Pond
"I had the pleasure of experiencing an old school British Sergeant-Major (in 1989, he'd been in at least 30 years at that point) while prepping for the BOTC grad parade."
"I think my favourite of the many gems was 'Somewhere a village is missing its idiot because he's prancing around on my parade square.'"
"He also corrected another grad about how to do an about-face and specifically it should not include 'screwing yourself into the parade square.'"
~ conicalanamorphosis
Veterans and military members, what's your best line from basic training?
Products People Refuse To Buy Simply Because They Hate The Commercial
Badly timed commercials and annoying, crappy commercials are not where the money is at.
Your product is what the money avoids.
Yet, so many companies keep making these inane advertisements.
And then whine and cry and wonder how they went out of business.
Redditor unfortunatelyalive7 wanted to hear about what things we all refuse to buy because of the advertising, so they asked:
"What is something you’ll never purchase simply because of how much you hate the commercial for it?"
15 Seconds
"Any ad on my phone or in a mobile game that causes me to have to either: press X to close it more than once, automatically opens up the app store, or is longer than 15 seconds."
- midnight_to_midnight
Phone Where Is It GIF by Specks of Dust Giphy
The Mess Up
"I keep getting ads like 'We messed up. We're so sorry. We made this amazing, incredible product, and we put it on sale,' or 'You don't wanna buy this product, it's too awesome," and I will never give those companies a chance."
- Chihuahuapocalypse
'Kinda similar, but I got an ad before the tariffs took effect that was pretty much 'last chance to get at this price before tariffs force us to raise it" for a supposedly American-manufactured product. Planning on raising the price before they even know if they have to or not really irked me."
- hogcranker42
Bad Looping
"Ironically, any ad that repeats itself on any of the streaming platforms. Sure, there’s brand recognition. But now you’ve annoyed the viewer so much that we’re averse to your brand and product."
- HAD7
"I hate ads. But I hate the same ad over and over and over. My wife and I would launch into the start of this car ad that played countless times over a few weeks whenever we watched Hulu. As soon as the show cut to black, we knew what was about to come up!"
- the_vault-technician
AHHHHHH!!!
"Anything that dials up the disgusting eating, crunching noises, or has the actor moaning about how good it is and mumbling with their mouths full. Any soda and that emphasises the performative 'AHHHHHH' after the sip."
- alicat2308
"I love Taco Bell so much, but all of their advertising in recent years is basically just close-up shots of people’s mouths as they’re eating. I f**king hate whoever is making these choices."
- Barfignugen
FOOL
"Not really a purchase, but the ChatGPT ad that has a couple with a dude trying to impress a girl with his cooking... and the song they play is 'Fool' by Perfume Genius. A song that is literally about being cheated on by a partner you trusted and thought you were building a life with. Like, you're allowed to read the lyrics before you pick the music."
- malachiconstant76
Super Common
"Anything from Brand Power. 'Try this super common dish soap!' and it's always a blonde woman with an unnerving voice sounding like she's chewing the TR sound in 'try.'"
- angryaxolotls
Clean Water GIF by Rotary International Giphy
Bad Scents
"Lume because I cannot stand that loud, obnoxious 'as an OBGYN' woman yelling about how she sweats buckets. Or anything she says."
"Whatever that woman with long blonde stringy hair is stapling onto her hair and yells SHUT-UP!'
- Cinnamon2017
"It disgusts me because it’s clearly preying on people who are disproportionately insecure/concerned about their scent, while simultaneously going on, 'society tries to make women feel bad about their smell! :(' as if their commercials don’t exist to create insecurities."
- anonymoussunflower7
Less is more?
"Toilet paper with the bears."
- xx_HotShott_xx
"Especially the one where it shows the teenage bear’s butt with little bits of toilet paper stuck all over it."
"That is just so unnecessarily disgusting."
"But if you remember where they always talked about ‘less is more?' My brother, the plumber, told me they have to do that because if you use too much Charmin, it might clog up your septic tank. I never buy it for that reason, but I also find the commercials ridiculous."
- Radiant-Pomelo-3229
HARDER
"Cadillac had a super douchy commercial where a fat balding middle-aged dude talked about never taking time off and working 'harder' than everyone else so you can buy a plastic shitbox masquerading as a luxury car."
"It's not that I was triggered or offended, I just about had to file an insurance claim because my eyes rolled so hard into the back of my head. It was like what the kids would call 'cringe boomerisms' merged and formed a boomer singularity, and I was being pulled beyond the event horizon. All of this in my living room, without my consent."
"You want me to buy your car? Show me real values."
- GreyhoundOne
Too Sad...
"Probably going to get hate for this, but the St. Jude’s, SPCA, or Humane Society of America. Any of those ones that play the sad music and try to pull at your heartstrings. I swear those commercials are 3 plus minutes, and they always play when I’m listening to music or something on YouTube. They always seem to play right when I’m in the middle of something or walk away, and I can’t skip the ad, so I’m stuck listening to a depressing commercial, and it pisses me off."
- MeatScience1
Unclear
"Liberty Mutual. What a lousy theme! I would also say any medication commercial that does not tell you what it is for. 'Ask your doctor about ZeZeZum.' The woman, seeing this, asks her doctor, who says 'That's for prostate symptoms. Women don't have prostates.'"
- kittendollie13
"Liberty Liberty Liiiberty."
- oNOCo
Repair/Replace
"Safelite. Hate those commercials."
- dosamaam
" Funny coincidence, but Safelite's jingle is short, and I don't find it all that annoying, and it has actually become my earworm dewormer. When I struggle with phrases, jingles, and songs stuck in my head, I sing this one once, and it fixes everything. No clue why, but I'm thankful for it."
"That said, I can't remember the last time I actually watched one of their commercials, and I have no plan on using their service... To me, it's just the tool that clears invasive soundbytes."
- V01DC41T
Extra! Extra!
"Recently: The McPickle sandwich."
"I actually quite like pickles, so I like the idea, but the commercial is people mashing the 'extra pickles' button at McDonald's and showing it on receipts and then being like 'we heard you like pickles...'"
"People aren't hitting the extra pickle button because they want a million pickles on one sandwich. They're pressing it because you're stingy as f**k and don't put enough condiments on your food."
- IJourden
Jared
"Jewelry from Jared Jewelers. 'He went to Jared.' Ugh! Hated those ads. They were the worst leading up to Christmastime."
- OakandIvy_9586
"Yes, all jewelry commercials make everyone think women only want overpriced jewelry, and that s**t sinks into our subconscious as a kid, and we grow up thinking that’s what we should want."
"Also, fragrance commercials at Christmas time."
- Clever-crow
Visualize Video Game GIF by Dr. Donna Thomas Rodgers Giphy
I agree with all of these things.
I can't stand those gaming ads.
They freeze my computer far too often.
And jewelry stores will always have a touch of the outdated going on.
If I can't skip the commercial, I go into the other room until it's over.
