Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

Gay Guy Trolls Straight Guys By Inventing 'Privacy Screen' For Them To Use While Eating Hot Dogs

Gay Guy Trolls Straight Guys By Inventing 'Privacy Screen' For Them To Use While Eating Hot Dogs
@mattyxb/Twitter

Straight men of the world, the day has finally come! At long last, you can eat hot dogs without people picturing you performing oral sex.

All you need is the Glizzy Gripper.


What is a Glizzy Gripper and why on Earth is it named that? Well, we can't answer the latter question, but as to the former, it's a privacy screen for your weiner (the kind you eat in public, with like ketchup and stuff, not the other kind that you eat in private), and it comes to us via Unnecessary Inventions.

Take a look at this revolutionary new innovation.

No longer will you need to question your masculinity or sexual orientation just because you like to put long cylinders of meat in your mouth.

Now you may be wondering, who, for the love of God, asked for this? The answer is (hopefully, at least) absolutely no one.

It's just the latest exploit of inventor Matt Benedetto, a Burlington, Vermont gay man who specializes in "designing products to solve problems that don't exist," according to his Twitter bio.

If you've ever wanted a Nuggie Necklace—a necklace that holds your chicken nuggets—or a scarf from which you can sip egg nog, Benedetto is your guy. His totally needless innovations for human life that literally no one asked for are so incredible, he's even been featured onThe Kelly Clarkson Show.

At first glance, the Glizzy Gripper may seem like the most ridiculous Unnecessary Invention of all. But given the much talked-about study that showed straight men won't even wear a mask during a global pandemic because they're afraid of looking weak, is it really that much of a stretch to think chomping on wieners gives them pause?

People on Twitter, certainly didn't think so!

And they made sure that uptight straight men were the butt of this wiener joke.




But some were far more focused on the Glizzy Gripper's glaring design flaws.





Unfortunately, it's not actually going to market any time soon. Like all of Benedetto's unnecessary inventions, the Glizzy Gripper is just another way for him to have fun with 3D printing.

Guess straight guys will just have to keep gobbling wieners the normal way, like the rest of us.

More from News/lgbtq

Kim Kardashian
Ernesto Ruscio/GC Images

Kim Kardashian Roasted After Seemingly Awkward Photo Fail At Jeff Bezos' Wedding Goes Viral

Kim Kardashian may be the queen of the social media snap, but she's getting roasted online for her latest attempt at Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sánchez's wedding in Venice.

From the elaborate trappings and guest list to the weeks of angry protests by Venetians furious that a Trump-funding technofascist and his celebrity sycophants were taking over their city for days on end, the wedding was nothing short of a spectacle.

Keep ReadingShow less
Abby Phillip; Donald Trump
Michael Loccisano/Getty Images; Hu Yousong/Xinhua via Getty Images

CNN's Abby Phillip Shares Classy Clapback After Trump Lashes Out At Her On Social Media

During the first term of MAGA Republican President Donald Trump, his relationship with the press was probably best described as volatile. He had his favorites—the ones that stroked his ego—and the ones he called "enemies of the people."

CNN has definitely been on Trump’s hit list for years.

Keep ReadingShow less
Brandon Gill; Zohran Mamdani
Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images; Noam Galai/Getty Images

MAGA Rep. Ripped For Racist Reaction To Mamdani Eating Rice With His Hands In Campaign Video

Texas Republican Representative Brandon Gill is facing harsh criticism after he told New York City mayoral candidate Zohran Mamdani to "go back to the Third World" after Mamdani shared a video of himself eating rice and lentils with his hands and talking about how his upbringing in Uganda and South Africa shaped his understanding of the Palestinian struggle.

At one point during his meal, Mamdani, who was raised in an Indian family, said:

Keep ReadingShow less
Kristi Noem
U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement via Getty Images

Homeland Security Slammed After Sharing Bonkers AI Image To Promote 'Alligator Alcatraz'

The Department of Homeland Security (DHS) came under fire after it shared an AI-generated image of alligators wearing ICE hats to promote a proposed "Alligator Alcatraz" immigration detention center in the Florida Everglades, a decision that prompted critics to call out the post's fascistic and cruel nature.

The image shows the alligators in caps marked “ICE” beside a barbed-wire fence and was captioned simply:

Keep ReadingShow less
The feet of two people snuggling under the covers
woman in white dress lying on white bed

Couples Who've Been Together For 20+ Years Explain How They Keep Their Sex Life Active

With each passing year, all couples tend to worry that their relationship might change over time.

That they'll stop being as spontaneous, affectionate or energetic as they were when they first began their courtship.

Keep ReadingShow less