Anyone who's ever quit a job has been subjected to the tired, irritating exercise of having to write a "formal resignation letter." A British grocery store worker's take on this thankless and tedious exercise is going viral after he took the phrase to its furthest and most hilarious extreme.
In the video, the now-former employee of British grocery chain Tesco takes the word "formal" quite literally--wax-sealed envelope, suit and tie, the whole nine--and it's a master class in pettiness that will make any beleaguered worker cheer.
See the man's "please, good sir, kindly take this job and place it where the sun's rays do not reach" formal resignation below.
After ceremoniously being handed his letter in the aforementioned wax-sealed envelope by a suited attendant--a fittingly formal opening if there ever was one--the employee began his resignation with a lyrical, stentorian oratory that would make even the Queen herself jealous.
"To whomever it may concern. I write this letter from a place of sorrow and regret."
"These six long, arduous years have caused me to grow quite weary. Whilst I have reveled and labored with my subordinates, my knees have grown weak, and the grease on my elbows has depleted."
"This is not for every man to accept large packages into their backdoor. Nonetheless, it was my duty."
Winston Churchill wishes! Barack Obama could never!
After a lengthy and eloquent rundown of his time at the local Tesco, the employee concluded with a polite thank you to his colleagues.
"I finish this letter with many thanks to my former comrades and I hereby submit my formal resignation."
He even included an upper crust rolled 'r' on "resignation." And then, to really sell the joke, the employee closed thusly:
"Viva la Tesco! All right, see you later."
An address worthy of a standing ovation if there ever was one. And a standing ovation--the digital version thereof, anyway--is exactly what Twitter gave this clever man.
Wherever he goes next, it's unlikely this gent will ever be forgotten by his former colleagues at the Tesco.