We've all experienced the unequivocal pain and disappointment of a friendship ending—and some of us have even experienced sudden, if not totally bewildering and unexplained, departures.
But sometimes there might be reason to worry about nefarious explanations for the split.
Trying to make the best of a dark situation, TikToker Trevor Hiltz did a "Get Ready with Me" video, showing him getting ready to go out to a romantic dinner with his partner, during the time when he was supposed to be the best man in his ex-best friend's wedding.
According to his initial TikTok video, Hiltz received an unusual message that "sounded like ChatGTP," addressed to him and six other people, that the wedding plans had changed and they were no longer invited to the event. Even though Hiltz was set to be the best man, he did not receive a phone call, or even a personalized message, that he had been cut.
Hiltz reflected on the situation:
"Like she was in my wedding about a year and a half ago."
"About six months ago, I went wedding dress shopping with her. Picked out her wedding dress with her. Had everything booked and just got put in a group chat and told that I am basically chopped liver."
"Now I'm not gonna dwell and I would never beg to be friends with someone, and I know that I'm, like, a damned good friend."
"And will I be sad about missing all the good memories, yeah. But, whatever the future holds."
"And I also just hope that no one else ever goes through the pain and sadness that I went through. Just because I don't think anyone deserves it."
You can watch the first video here:
Fellow TikTokers' interest was peaked, and they needed to know what the group chat message stated.
At the start of the video, Hiltz reiterated how strange it was to read the message, stating that something felt "off" about it, and he had been caught completely off-guard.
He had just gone wedding dress shopping with his friend six months prior and had performed vital best man duties since then, helping to plan the wedding. Then the message was received just weeks before the big day.
The message read:
"Good afternoon all,"
"I hope this message finds you well. As we continue to finalize the details for our upcoming wedding, we've had to make some difficult decisions regarding our guest list."
"Unfortunately, you are among the individuals we need to uninvite due to unforeseen circumstances and the need to keep our celebration more intimate. This was not an easy decision, and we sincerely hope you understand."
What's worse is that Hiltz even tried to reach out to the bride in a private message to see what was going on, and he said he received "an even colder" message from her.
You can watch the second video here:
Appalled, fellow TikTokers had to know what was said in the "even colder" message. Wasn't the group chat cold enough?
Apparently not. Hiltz then shared a few brief examples of how he and his friend had been talking about the wedding months before, including how she planned to involve him in the wedding day celebration.
The message she sent him to explain the invitation retraction was cold and distant in comparison.
"Good morning,"
"I'm fine, and I appreciate you checking in. [My partner] and I have decided to move forward with an elopement instead of the original wedding plans."
"Please go ahead and cancel your reservations with the places you have booked. Others have already done so without any issues."
You can watch the third video here:
Some TikTokers were simply shocked by how Hiltz had been treated and insisted he deserved better.
This would be shady for someone to do for anyone invited to a wedding—after all, they at least deserved an individual, personalized, private message if they were being disinvited. But for this to happen to the best man, just weeks before the wedding, after years of friendship, disinviting him in this fashion was nothing short of cruel.
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But others were concerned that something more insidious was afoot.
After all, the writing style had completely changed between his friend's messages months before and in the two recent texts. Not to mention the lack of decorum presented in those messages compared to the obvious thought that had been put into asking Hiltz to be her best man.
For all anyone in the present conversation knew, the husband might have sent all of the messages, and he might have told her some lie about the best man dropping out and not wanting to be her friend anymore, leading her to not reach out to him to check.
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We can all appreciate that plans change sometimes, and we all make mistakes and don't always show the best versions of ourselves, even to the people we love most.
But to offer for an old friend to be your best man, only to send him a group chat to remove him from the wedding entirely, either you're a terrible friend or there's something else going on entirely.
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Dunning-Kruger Times