People Describe The Weirdest Things A Guest Has Ever Done In Their Home

Ir feels like people have lost all sense of decorum when visiting others.

Guests may be loved ones, but they're flawed individuals as well.

And bad behavior is no fun to clean up after.

Houseguest stories are terrifying.

But we must hear them.

To learn.

Redditor sodamnsleepy wanted to hear about the times a houseguest has left an impression we'd rather forget, so they asked:

"What's something weird a guest did in your home and you didn't know how to react?"

BAFFLED

"My mother-in-law was coming to visit, and I saw her arrive. Instead of knocking on our front door, though, she went into the backyard. I was so confused. I looked out back to see her going behind a bush, dropping trou, and squatting. I assume she peed. I am baffled to this day. I said nothing."

- koopdujour

Say Cheese!

"Had some friends over for a housewarming party. One of them went to my bedroom and put my CPAP mask on his junk and sent me a picture of it three days later."

- rtpsych

Melissa Joan Hart Lol GIF by LifetimeGiphy

Not Family Friendly

"A family friend was staying at my house for the week. At the end of the week, my desktop was working really slowly. After a brief look through of the history, I noticed two things. The amount of cartoon adult videos both viewed and downloaded was ridiculous. I didn't know how to react at the moment, but on the drive to his home, I had to let him know that he was definitely banned from using my desktop after that."

- REDDIT

Ashes 2 Ashes

"Ash their cigarette on the floor then get really, really mad when we ask them not to do it again."

- Tsujimoto3

"This makes me cringe to this day. I'm at a house party. Talking to the host whom I did not know. In my half-lit state, I light up a cig and we continue talking. I ash in my old beer as we talked as I didn't want to get up. I personally hate when people leave cans with butts in them. So after finishing the cig and knocking the cherry off."

"I look at him and ask, 'Where is your ash try?' He looks me at me and says 'I don't own one, we don't smoke in the house.' It got so awkward. I asked him why he didn't yell at me when I lit it up. He told me I seemed so confident when I lit it that he didn't want to say anything. To this day, I feel bad about it."

- RedneckRafter

Trashed

"I once had a guest throw out a log of their s**t wrapped in a garbage bag in my garbage can in the bathroom. I never said anything about it; I just emptied out the trash and sat down for a moment to try to process why someone would do such a thing.
I told a friend of a friend about it, and they, too, were puzzled by it."

- jairtzinio

Catch the Flow

"Guy was friends with my now ex-husband, flew into town to interview for a job. I got stuck picking him up from the airport because ex-husband was working nights. He insisted we had to stop at Sonic on the way home because he would flunk the interview the next day without a drink from there. We get home and I show him to the guest room and guest bathroom, he tells me he needs to watch some TV to wind down before bed."

"I hand him the remote to the one in the living room and go to bed. I woke up several times throughout the night due to the surround sound, he was watching war movies with the volume all the way up. I get up in the morning and walk into my living room… that has been completely rearranged."

"He moved every piece of my living room furniture to a new spot. When he comes out of the guest room to take a shower and get ready for his interview, he tells me the room 'flows so much better now' and that he watches a lot of HGTV so he knows how to decorate."

"Then, just before he leaves for the interview in an Uber, he tells me he really doesn’t like the shampoo in my guest bath, and I should get something better for visitors. I have no clue what he’s going on about, so I look after he leaves: flea and tick shampoo was the only bottle in the shower, left after my dog's last bath and clearly marked as such."

"He used flea and tick shampoo and then got mad at me for it. He bombed his interview, my ex-husband took him back to the airport, and I never saw the guy again. Guess the Sonic didn’t work after all."

- NoStrangerToTheRain

Let it Rip

"Walked into the kitchen, turned the tap on, farted very loudly turned the tap off, and walked back out like we didn't see or hear him let rip."

- Ms_Evey

"I lived with a woman who would turn the shower on every time she went to go poop to cover up the sound. The problem is, I'd generally be in the bedroom just outside, so not only could I hear her rip to the tune of a car on its last leg, I swear that the steam somehow just spread the particles out to where I was."

- luminousshadows

Help Yourself

"In my first apartment, I made the mistake of telling a friend to 'help himself' to my fridge, thinking he'd grab a drink. He made a sandwich, grabbed a parfait I had in there for me to have later in the day, took a whole family-sized bag of Doritos, and then decided he also wanted to clear out other portions of my food. When he came back with all this s**t and started pounding it down, I was in shock."

"Worst part? I was a poor college student working two part-time jobs to afford anything I had, and he -knew- I didn't have a lot. He lived at home with his parents and was allowed to binge eat like this whenever---I didn't have that luxury. I didn't invite him over, and if he tagged along with a friend, I told them all the fridge/my food was off limits."

- RensinRedjaw

College Daze

"I was a freshman in college. I had an off-campus apartment. At one of the many parties, this guy comes up to me and says, 'I spilled a beer on your carpet. It's okay, though; I stepped on it.' I had no idea what to say. We still joke about it occasionally."

- m1mike

back to school college GIF by Rodney DangerfieldGiphy

You're Sorry?!

"I had a friend take an hour-long s**t in my bathroom once. When he came out, finally, I asked if he was ok. He sheepishly said, 'Yeah, sorry. I had some cleaning up to do.' When I asked what that meant, he said, 'Well, I went in to just pee but then decided to try to squeeze out a fart but sh**ted all over your wall. I've spent the last hour cleaning the s**t off of the stucco."

- butkusny

The Vanished

"Years ago. Had a small gathering. People chipped in for pizza, and a guy and gal (not the guy’s wife, who was there) went to pick it up. They never returned."

- gripes-of-wrath

Bad Auntie...

"Our friend had his auntie over from somewhere, and we invited them over for some drinks. The auntie started rubbing my leg under the table. I just sat there talking, trying to ignore it. My wife went to the bedroom to do something, and our friend followed her, making a move. It was literally like they had it planned all along. Hence to say, we never had anything to do with them ever again after that."

- Traditional-Energy-7

Bedeviled

"When my mom remarried, we had a small ceremony in our house and had a small spread of food, including a honey-baked spiral-cut ham that was the circumference of a dinner plate - just huge green beans and deviled eggs. My aunt Rhonda, my mom's SIL, ate a stack of ham easily two inches thick, got a second plate with the same, ate all four of her kid's plates (the kids didn't eat much) that had been piled high, ate 23 devilled eggs and packed up a third plate that had about three inches worth of ham slices. We just kind of sat back in amazement."

- eliz1bef

Good Morning

"When I was younger, my mom woke up at 6 am on a random weekday and found a neighbor kid from a few blocks away just eating cereal at our kitchen counter. He was completely unphased. Didn’t have mental issues and didn’t have a broken home. Just felt like cereal, I guess."

- Cokestraws

Where's the Rest?

"There was this guy my husband and I had met once before; we invited him over to watch a movie with us (we were new to the city, trying to make friends), and he said he’d bring pizza. He brought a half-eaten pizza. He asked to use our laptop (was on FB the whole time) and proceeded to fall asleep in our living room recliner during the movie. It was an odd encounter."

- TheJoyfulJoy

Season 6 Reaction GIF by FriendsGiphy

This is why I always say... "Get an Airbnb, or I'll help chip in for a hotel for you."

Houseguests can cause such stress, and here are stories to prove it.

Just a quick visitor can be cause for getting some sage and an exorcist to fumigate.

I always try to be the best version of myself whenever I enter the home of others.

I'm not perfect, but I leave food for others, and no one has cleaned up after myself.

Is that so hard?

Do you have any similar stories? Let us know in the comments below.