Some people schedule every second of their day.
Without personal calendars, lives can fall apart.
I've known couples who didn't realize that months passed without lovemaking.
I won't tell you where the love story went from there.
They never have to schedule sex in the movies or in romance novels.
In reality lovers are sitting down with a spreadsheet.
Redditor Legitimate-Bet4212 wanted to hear about everyone's lovemaking calendar, so they asked:
"Couples who have scheduled sex, how has it been going?"
Working Out Well
"Good. It gives you something to look forward to for hours or sometimes days, you come to bed freshly showered, not tired or tipsy, and sex is... well... pretty great."
- ShakeCNY
Sacha Baron Cohen Thumbs Up GIF by Amazon Prime VideoGiphy
Obligation/Chore
"We did it for about a year but we have mismatched libidos. She began to feel that it was an obligation/chore rather than an activity she looked forward to."
"Putting it more than a week away didn’t work either."
"We’re considering trying it again, it’s been a few years, the kid is older and not so dependent, and we have a more routine schedule now."
- clovisx
The Look
"We have a 3-year-old and a puppy. Times are rough. But when she goes 'How bout some action tonight?' It's about all I can think about all day. We send sexy texts. And give each other 'the look' a few times throughout the day. By the time it actually comes to banging, we're like starved hyenas who found a carcass. Just absolutely going to town. I think I actually prefer it this way now."
- Lurkist
Wednesday
"It started out as a joke actually. We both have Wednesday off, we have the house to ourselves while the kids are at school, and found ourselves fooling around during that time a couple of weeks in a row. Then one week I was like 'Well it IS Wednesday, you know what that means.' Just kinda joking, (unless you’re gonna do it 😉) and she was like 'It is!' And we got into it.'"
"Now every week, sometimes I’ll say it, sometimes she will say it: 'Well it is Wednesday so…'"
"It’s not exactly every single Wednesday but it’s almost every Wednesday, plenty of other days in between, we have a healthy 3x+ a week habit after 18 years.
"Today's Wednesday! I gotta go guys."
- OsoRetro
Saturday Glory
"2 kids, 2 full-time jobs, many after-school activities. We’ve found the only time we’re both alone and not totally exhausted is about an hour on Saturday mornings before we have to start another round of ferrying them to sports. It wasn’t meant to be scheduled but we both have libidos that are happy with once a week right now, so Saturday mornings it is!"
- Super_Ground9690
Thanks Bob
"My wife and I have a similar thing. Our times have been scheduled on any weekend day. However, with kids, etc, she gets worried about them hearing. So she asks me to 'put anything on the TV.' It just so happens that I consistently put on Bob's burgers since it’s the first thing that pops up. (We love that show). Anyways, we did that so often that now mentioning Bob's Burgers is our little code. She will innocently say 'Let’s watch Bob Burgers' and I’m like 'I mean we can, but the kids are still awake.'"
- sushicat0423
GO GO GO
"Married with three kids who all play different sports and activities. It's not so much scheduled as a look. Like we have 30 minutes... GO GO GO. It's like a Zero Dark Thirty Seal Team 6 operation."
- CTnaturist
Al Pacino Love GIF by Arrow VideoGiphy
Freaky Fridays
"We have unscheduled sex as well but we do try to have Freaky Fridays (and Sexy Saturdays if Friday doesn't work out). There is usually a date involved as well, but sometimes those dates are taken out and Netflix."
" We got a little one so it's hard to do the involved stuff during the week."
- gunnie56
FUN
"Not particularly 100% scheduled as in the same time every week but one of us often says on a morning 'lets have fun tonight' or if we've had a busy week 'on friday when we're both home'. It works well for us."
- buginarugsnug
"I love that! I find that you both end up riling yourselves up all day thinking about it and it leads to an awesome night."
- Suspicious_Kick9467
"This is what we do. We have kids so you don't get the spontaneous action as much, but sometimes it happens. If it's been like a week, one of us will call it out and 'schedule' it for that night or the next night."
- akatherder
Clockwork
"We scheduled twice a week and she loved it very much as she only need to say no twice a week."
- Saerah4
"Not sure if you're joking or not, but that's literally EXACTLY what happened to us. It was just scheduled rejection. Didn't last long.
- BigMax
Transactional
"I used to think scheduling sex would be really rigid and/or make it feel transactional. The opposite has been true. One of us will ask earlier in the day or about the next day. It's great - the anticipation adds to it being hot rather than ruining it and we are able to make it a priority."
- MirrorConsistent857
"This is why I love preplanned sex. My body is willing I just need to maneuver my brain with a quick shower and a chance to brush my teeth."
- AdChemical1663
Get it Done
"Had scheduled sex while trying for kids. Pressure to finish was distinctly unpleasant. And although I wouldn’t exactly call the whole thing a chore, the scheduled sessions were definitely more a ‘let’s get this done’. Also meant I concentrated less on her so I made sure I finished which couldn’t have been as good for her either.
- Obligatory-not-the
"As someone who went through IVF with my wife, I feel you. We still have some scheduled sex now, but it’s waaayyy different than the scheduled/timed sex of our IVF days, because this sex is being scheduled for fun rather than for a result on a timeline. There is no pressure now."
"I’m in my mid 40s, and sometimes things don’t biologically work as wells as they did 10 years ago. And you know what? It’s not a big deal because there’s no pressure to perform; we can just switch to other forms of sexual intimacy that time without worrying about blowing the chance to make a baby."
- putsch80
Summertimes
"I just had a discussion with my wife, and we agreed to try and have sex every night this summer, maybe skipping a day here and there. I can't believe she agreed to it. I'm very excited! We've been married 20 years and have kids."
"Things have been great lately!"
- kdh79
15 Years In
"Its great. We had missmatched sex drives due to some long term stress for her. My sex drive is higher. I am autistic (53 Male) and couldn't tell when NOT to initiate sex - often at very inappropriate times. We both saw damage being done by a NO over and over. We scheduled a weekly in and things are great. We set that up over 15 years ago. That doesn't mean that it can't happen other days, it just guarantees that we have sex at least once a week."
- cephaloman
Months Later
"Good I suppose. When you both are working, and then after work juggling young kids. Time flies and then realise you haven't had sex for like 3 months.
- Stoopidee
Relationships take work, particularly if you're juggling family and career.
We applaud these couples for making time for each other.
Ain't love grand?
Be sure to get those calendars out.
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