Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Divulge The Unspoken Rules Of Sex

People Divulge The Unspoken Rules Of Sex
We-Vibe Toys on Unsplash
Make us preferred on Google

Sex is fun. That is rule #1... sex should be fun.

And it should be safe and responsible and yada yada yah.

Sex should be all of those things. And it should be something we can speak openly about.

Let's not sit around waiting for Madonna to sing about it some more, let's already implement the lessons she's espoused.

There are rules and conversations to be had, and no class in school, or book is going to be able to tell you everything.

So let's chat...


Redditor xk543x wanted to talk about sex baby.

They asked:

"What are some unspoken rules of sex?"

Try to stay as sober as possible. Not remembering due to alcohol or whatever your poison is, just feels empty.

Too Sharp

"Cut/sand down any fingernails you plan to put inside another person."

pengd0t

Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy

Easy Motions

"To all the cowgirls out there, the penis is breakable, be a bit gentle."

Commercial_Quarter_6

"That audible pop will never leave your mind. Even after Alzheimer's riddles your brain."

jbase1775

"Yeah, if you're a cowgirl, grinding your hips back and forth is the motion, not bouncing up and down. If you want a thrusting motion when you're on top, lay down on top of him and let him do the work."

nerf_herder1986

Bad Move Bro...

"Never tell a woman, 'oh but I didn't have an issue with this with my exes."'This was when I tried to tell him, again, but well after sex that he was just rubbing my clit wrong. He was practically jabbing it with his thumb like it was an elevator button. Every woman is different!"

daytimeinsomnia

"I had a guy ask my if I was enjoying myself because I wasn't moaning in that moment and 'most people are moaning more by now.' We never had sex again."

Jenny_Rea

Cuddles

"Give them a hug and kiss afterwards. It helps."

ShalidorsSecret

"Depends. Could be confusing to someone just expecting casual sex and getting that... might seem like a pity hug or something. The phrasing reminds me of something Abby would encounter on Broad City to be honest."

"But yeah ~ do that when dating someone, definitely. Hug, kiss, cuddle as default. Hugging and a kiss after finishing is not a rule for sex, its a rule for 'intimate or semi-intimate partner' sex. Sex for the first time with someone and you're 'meh' about seeing them again, DO NOT hug/kiss. That is just leading the other person to believe that there is more to the encounter than what you're feeling."

DigbyChickenZone

Stay the Course...

"Please do not go faster/harder if you can tell I am about to finish. Do exactly what you were doing that got me there."

"Sincerely, my clitoris."

tinybirdblue

Relaxed Basketball Wives GIF by VH1Giphy

Be confident. And be truthful. If they're doing it wrong... say it. Help the next person out.

Hush

"Don't start talking about your ex or your kids at any point in proceedings."

cruiserman_80

be quiet bbc three GIF by BBCGiphy

I'm Only Me

"Don't blame you. Being compared to other partners is rude and weird, especially in the moment. Imo, it's healthier and more enjoyable to approach sex as a fun, exploratory connection, rather than a 'if I do X, they do Y! If they do this, I get that!' So many sexual scripts are inaccurate, and they reduce the uniqueness of connecting with an individual."

fauxfoucault

'..no?'

"If you’re enjoying something, just enjoy it, and don’t ask them where they learned to do it."

ArmyOfDog

"My wife and I are poly. One time I was going down on someone who was pretty new to the scene and I guess they were impressed because they asked 'did [wife] teach you that?' I didn't really have an answer besides '..no?' and they just sort of seemed generally uncomfortable until we stopped a couple minutes later. They obviously ended up realizing that non-monogamy wasn't really for them and we stayed platonic friends. <3"

"Possibly TMI but I love pretty much all sex, seeing it, hearing about it, etc. but I can get why people don't want to think about partners with other people. To this day that feels like such a weird fucking question for someone in the latter category to ask during sex."

FirstPlayer

And you are?

"Don’t get their name wrong."

Princess_Snarkle

“'Freedom of speech does not mean freedom from consequences. You’re well within your rights to shout out another person’s name while making love to your partner… but if you don’t think there won’t be at LEAST a discussion…' - Russell Howard"

defguysezhuh

CLEAN!!!

"Hygiene... that is all."

imperiects

" Wash your EVERYTHING!!!"

Snooty_Goat

Giphy

Don't be Awkward

"Don’t ask a woman to brush her teeth after she’s given you oral sex before you’ll kiss her. She will cry. And also, she’s just had YOUR PENIS in her mouth. To be fair, 25-year-old me didn’t know he was going to lose his virginity that night, but still. Learned that one real quick. Was real awkward."

boredlawyer90

Warm Up Essential!

"Pre heat the oven don’t just shove it in."

WeirdAttorney4795

"Always salt your pasta while boiling it."

EchoPrince

Stench

"Never fart if a girl is giving you oral sex."

REDDIT

"This happened to me in college. Right when I got off. She jerked her head up from the shock wave, stench and ended up with a mess. Ol' Smelly Musket."

PGHMtneerDad

"This happened once and I was so embarrassed. My gf finished like a champ but she still makes fun of me."

yoshiioko

Crowded Field

"All stuffed animals OFF the bed..They don't need to see this. (Context, I am 20f and sleep with a cuddly toy)."

Oobleooblets

academy awards stuffed animal GIF by E!Giphy

"weird"

"Even when you are clean you’ll still have a natural body odor of some kind. Don’t talk about it."

ShiftlessGuardian94

"There are people out there with 'weird' odor issues, which probably should be dealt with, but yeah usually it's more like a unique smell, rather than a pleasant or unpleasant smell, and if you get negative thoughts just by smelling them, you're probably just not happy with that person."

S_roemer

START SLOW!

"If you want to do something kinky that you've never done with that person, or never explicitly talked about, START SLOW! We hear the choked-out-of-nowhere horror stories surprisingly often in comments, it's always people going 0 to 100 and scaring the crap out of their partner."

"For that example, you start with like a playful, gentle grab of the neck, see how your partner responds or ask if you're not sure. Then you kinda work up in stages until you reach the limit of what's comfortable, or ideally what feels best. You know, instead of helping someone live their nightmares. I think people would be more willing to explore if these crappy experiences weren't so common."

Extra_Organization64

"This is why."

"The partner that doesn't get an orgasm out of it is sooner or later going to be trying to rush through sex as quickly as possible. They won't want foreplay and they'll be happy for you to come quick."

"Why doesn't my partner want sex?"

"This is why."

AggravatingTartlet

Say Something

"Not a single rule should go unspoken, with the exception of mutual respect. Ask questions and make clear boundaries before, during, and after. want to try something? ask. Not comfortable with something? Tell them."

Western_Cook8422

speak jimmy fallon GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy

SPEAK

"The unspoken rule of sex should be to SPEAK. Don’t get me wrong, a good mindless, in-the-moment, tuned to each other’s bodies session is great, but if you’re having sex with someone you care about, take the time to discuss goals, wants, needs, and anything else ahead of time. 'Here’s what I want' should be spoken by each party, so you have a clear goal, and know what to do to reach it."

"Maybe your goal is to finish and go to bed. Maybe it’s to try something new. Maybe you just want to be given oral for hours or worshipped. Maybe you want to be berated and disciplined. It opens up a world of opportunity you otherwise wouldn’t ever explore because you never discussed it."

Shadesmctuba

I hope you all wrote this down, or bookmarked. Especially that last one. Sadly it's too often overlooked.

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Todd Rundgren; Taylor Swift
Tim Mosenfelder/Getty Images; Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

'70s Rock Star Sparks Heated Debate After Claiming That Taylor Swift Has 'Ruined Music'

Taylor Swift's new extended album The Life of a Showgirl: Encore has been even more poorly received than the original version last year, and you can count Todd Rundgren among those who aren't impressed.

Who the heck is that? The 78-year-old rocker had a slew of hits in the 1970s, including "Hello It's Me" and "I Saw The Light," and also produced some of the most important rock albums of the era.

Keep ReadingShow less
Spencer Pratt; James Talarico
HIGHFIVE/Bauer-Griffin/GC Images; Brandon Bell/Getty Images

Spencer Pratt Gets Blunt Reminder After Claiming It's 'Weird' That James Talarico Is Almost 40 And Has Never Been Married

According to U.S. Census Bureau Estimates, as of 2026, the estimated median age at first marriage in the United States is 30.8 years for men. That has changed over time as people are waiting longer to get married.

In 1975, the median age for men to marry for the first time was 23.5, by 2004 it had risen to 27.4, and by 2014 to 29.3. The steady increase over the decades was attributed to more people prioritizing completing their education and establishing their careers to become financially stable before marrying.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshot of Penny Lee during MS NOW interview
MS NOW

MAGA Voter Sounds Off About Her Regret Over Voting For Trump In Blistering Viral Interview: 'I'm Pissed'

Penny Lee, a Florida woman who voted for President Donald Trump, admitted to a reporter with MS NOW that she regrets voting for him and says that the Trump administration has run the country "into the ground."

Lee spoke to the press at a gas station in the town of Clewiston and her remarks highlight the stress many Americans are living with as a nationwide affordability crisis continues unabated.

Keep ReadingShow less
Ken Paxton; Donald Trump
Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images; Aaron Schwartz/Getty Images

Ken Paxton Privately Admits GOP Candidates' Numbers 'Dropped' Due To Trump's Midterm Convention In Leaked Audio

Texas attorney general and U.S. Senate nominee Ken Paxton privately admitted in a newly-leaked audio clip that "everybody's numbers dropped" after the Republican midterm convention where President Donald Trump appeared last month.

Trump spoke for nearly two hours that night, with his address airing live on Fox News as well as the Nielsen-rated cable networks Newsmax and NewsNation. Trump promised a "Trump dividend" of $5000 to every adult if Republicans win both chambers of Congress, asked his supporters to do him “the biggest favor” and “pretend” they are voting for him in November.

Keep ReadingShow less
Jack Smith; Eric Schmitt
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images; Saul Loeb/AFP via Getty Images

Video Proves Jack Smith Was At Iowa Hawkeyes Game And Not In Atlanta After MAGA Senator's Epic 'Gotcha' Blunder

Former special counsel Jack Smith was indeed, as he told Missouri Republican Senator Eric Schmitt during a contentious hearing, at an Iowa Hawkeyes game in 2024, per video proof making the rounds following Schmitt's viral blunder.

On Tuesday, Schmitt accused Smith of perjury after repeatedly questioning him about whether he had attended an NBA game in Atlanta on February 3, 2024. The Atlanta Hawks hosted the Golden State Warriors that evening.

Keep ReadingShow less