an Oh Myyy Property

When something tickles our funny bone, it's natural to let it out with laughter. Hardy, boisterous laughter that would make Santa Claus blush and The Joker rethink his lifestyle choices. That begs the question, though: What could have possibly made someone laugh the hardest they ever had in their life? Surprisingly, answers may vary.


Reddit user, u/GarlicsPepper, wanted to know exactly what caused you to bust a gut when they asked:

What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life?

PIZZA. IS. NOT. A. SALAD.

I nearly lost my mind laughing at my buddy's bachelor party, late at night, sitting at a table after much drinking.

One of his friends, who is a lawyer, shared a theory that he'd heard. All foods can be categorized into four groups: Sandwich, Salad, Soup, or Ravioli. In other words, by this definition, a taco would be a sandwich (carb used to hold ingredients, open edges) whereas a calzone or a pop tart would be classified as a ravioli. This is obviously a ridiculous position, but most of us were used to this guy's nonsense.

However, one of the other guys at the table is from New York and took issue with this. He had never met the lawyer before this weekend. Things started getting heated. The more upset at these categories the guy from New York became, the more the lawyer doubled down and gave increasingly preposterous explanations and logic. "What about spaghetti you f-cker?" "Clearly a salad, it's tossed ingredients with a dressing." Meanwhile the rest of us were starting to lose it at how upset the New Yorker was getting.

It culminated in the guy from New York standing up out of his chair, slamming his hands against the table and passionately screaming "PIZZA IS NOT A F---ING SANDWICH" while the rest of us were crying laughing. Good times.

swingfire23

Something So Funny It's Violent

I have a Ukrainian coworker who was several decades older than me, and is a super serious, pretty strange guy. He has a very stereotypical oldschool Soviet style to him (he always speaks and identifies as Russian). He heard my friend and I telling trivial amusing stories to each other on a break, and joined our little circle with the biggest smile on his face. Looking to join in and relate, he explains that when he was in University he had a car, but his friends destroyed his car by literally blugeoning it to pieces and then beat him viciously as a prank.

You know, as friends do.

Then he could barely get through the next part of the story he was laughing so hard, when he explained that from then on he had to run to and from University. He said he ran so often with his bag that he ended up separating his abdominal muscles and severely injuring himself. By this point my friend and I are dying from laughter too, so our comrade feels great about his smash hit of a story and heads back to his desk.

I still won't go in a room alone with that guy.

ThatKarmaWh-re

My Sister Is Half-Coyote

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Standing on the sidewalk next to one of those metal electrical boxes. My little sister is standing between me and the box, facing me. She shouts "TAG YOURE IT!" and spins around to run away at a full sprint.

She slams into the box just like Wile E Coyote running into a wall.

I have never laughed so hard in my life! The people passing by afterward just saw a six year old crying next to an adult laughing her a-- off uncontrollably on the ground. Eventually i composed myself and picked her up and told her she'll be alright. I felt so bad but d-mn if i wasnt suppressing giggles the whole way home.

notoriousfishtank

I Laughed So Hard I "Sit" Myself

My friend is from Japan. One time, she was trying to say "I was sitting on the bed," and instead she said, "I sh-t the bed."

I knew what she had meant to say, but I started laughing uncontrollably, something that was not helped by her yelling, "Nononononononono!" upon realizing she had royally f-cked up that sentence.

OMothmanWhereArtThou

Burning Rubber

During the peak of those "what in tarnation?" memes, my college buddies and I road tripped from Michigan to NO for Mardi Gras during our spring break.

About 10 hours in, when we were already feeling really goofy/bored from the long trip, a tire rolled across the highway in front of the car.

My friend, while the tire is still crossing our path, screams "WHAT IN TIIIIRE NAITON!".

And that stupid ass joke is the hardest I've ever laughed.

a_trane13

Tragedy is Best Followed By Comedy

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Told the story before, but it still one of my favorites:

Small child, maybe 4 years old is running with 2 two liter bottles of soda (maybe it was root beer). Lots of bouncing already. Then she trips, bottles go flying and she face plants. She lifts her head up to cry.... and just then... at that perfectly timed moment, the cap blows off one of the bottles into her face spraying her with soda and foam. Her mother runs over, still pushing the shopping cart for some reason, and naturally, slips on the other soda and trying to catch herself grabs the side of the shopping cart she and cart tip over. A bag of flour explodes and covers the sticky child.

All of this was done with the precision of a 1940s comedy short, it was really impressive. And sadly, I did not get to film it.

xilstudio

Comedy Comes In Stages

It was in summer this year actually.

There was a middle aged couple walking in front of me with Ice creams. The guy obviously didn't see the step ledge on the floor coming up and tripped over it. As he tripped over his flailing arm shoved the ice cream right onto an oncoming child's forehead. The ice cream cone stayed in place for a couple of second before it slid off. The kid looked like a f-cking unicorn.

I was literally crying with laughter and it was so hard to compose myself. You had to be there, but omg the funniest scene of events ever.

Millennial123

Luckily, It Wasn't Milk

In college my roommates and I had a fun ritual for putting away our groceries after shopping. There were so many of them we had to find a fun way to do it!

I posted myself with all the bags in the dining room and the other 4 posted in the kitchen. Then, I'd just start throwing the stuff at them. Pretty quick I might add.

It didn't matter if it was glass, milk jugs, soda, it got thrown. And they always caught it.

Until one day I threw a gallon of orange juice.

They all thought someone else had it and it ended up exploding all over the kitchen. A gallon of anything is a lot when it's suddenly all over the floor!

We all started laughing while trying to clean it up, tears and everything, but then one of my roommates looked at all of us and said "It's a good thing it wasn't milk, otherwise this would've been an udder catastrophe!"

At that, we all broke down laughing, on the ground, in the orange juice. It was just too perfect. Our abs and faces hurt so much from all the laughing.

In conclusion, I miss my roommates.

pandaspawdraws

Burning Rubber

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During the peak of those "what in tarnation?" memes, my college buddies and I road tripped from Michigan to NO for Mardi Gras during our spring break.

About 10 hours in, when we were already feeling really goofy/bored from the long trip, a tire rolled across the highway in front of the car.

My friend, while the tire is still crossing our path, screams "WHAT IN TIIIIRE NAITON!".

Man vs. Machine

At a party someone started a riding lawnmower up, turned the steering wheel to the left and put it in high gear so it ran around in circles. It was funny at first but got annoying after a while so we tried to shut it off. The problem is it was moving pretty fast and we were all too drunk to catch it. Every time one of us would try to grab it and hop on, we would miss fall over and get ran over by the lawnmower.

It got so funny watching everyone try that we couldn't stop laughing. We eventually started throwing rocks at it which was even funnier trying to see drunk people try and aim a rock at a moving object.

This went on for a good hour before it ran out of gas.

higbee77

13/10

Took my younger brother to one of the early X-Men movies years ago.

I asked him what he thought. "I give it a 7 .... out of 11 .... million".

Stupid, but I laughed. Then laughed more, and couldn't stop laughing. I couldn't drive us home for a while I was laughing so hard.

fmoss

You Know, As Cousins Do...?

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Back in the mid-90's when I was a 15-something teenager. My cousins and I had the house to ourselves, so one decides to put a porno in the VCR. I warned him that my dad was coming home soon and that he might want to think twice, but he didn't heed my warning. We kept watching the front door so we'd be ready to eject the tape and not get caught; lo and behold my dad just happened to come through the side door in the garage that day and was suddenly standing there behind us.

Myself and one of my cousins bolted out of the room when we noticed him, the 3rd cousin wasn't so lucky. He noticed us running off and, with my dad right behind him, shouted after us, "Hey, where you guys going?" At that point I lost all feelings in my legs as I fell to the floor in laughter. I could still see my cousin through the hallway, as he was slowly turning around and noticing my dad behind him, at which point he jumped back around, frantically trying to figure out how to turn off the VCR, but to no avail. It was one of those really old VCR's where Stop and Eject weren't on the front of the unit. He finally just dropped to his knees and tried "hugging" the TV to block the picture, crying that he was sorry.

I turned so red from laughter that it felt like I was running a fever, I had difficulty breathing for the rest of the day and my ribs felt like they'd been shattered. My poor cousin though, he not only got caught watching porn in hilarious fashion, but he also got teased for years.

Everything80sFan

H/T: Reddit





Addiction makes you do strange things...

Addictions are dangerous. It takes a hold of your life and strangles it. It festers slowly and disintegrates your world. Well most of them do. We all have behavioral addictions that often become a quirky character trait. Sometimes it can actually be cute. Well certain behaviors within reason that is. Some can be downright annoying and fodder for the therapist.

Redditor u/milanamilana asked people to divulge a few things, asking... What's your "strange addiction"?

Ah the cones...

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When I am out walking in wooded areas I spend a lot of time trying to find pine cones to stand on.

I do it because when you find a suitably dry one it feels amazing and sounds so good. Do it. Tends to work best if they are stood upright. wewannagetloaded

The sound of music...

I will listen to music for hours on end while walking around a room, imagining various stories and scenarios. Glissando365

I do that constantly. It doesn't interfere with my life but I love coming up with all kinds of stories and dropping myself into them. ParsnipPizza2

Flesh eater.

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Chewing the inside of my mouth. classik_e

My 30 year old sister has done this her whole life, and I have never seen or met anyone else that does it as noticeably as her. She'll take the second knuckle of her index finger and push her cheek in so she can chew on it. She's gotten better about not doing it as often. I've never asked her why she does it. yolkfacekilla

Daydream Believer. 

I'm not sure how common this is but shopping for million dollar penthouses and yachts that I will never be able to afford. I just like to dream I guess. ShellSwitch

I do this a ton, it's my night time wind down in bed activity to look at /r/roomporn and imagine myself as the buyer. What I would change, what I like etc etc. ExeterMegaladon

Yuck! 

This is so gross but I am addicted to picking. Pimples, dry skin, scabs, anything pick-able I will dig at it till I bleed. No I am not on drugs. It's so bad that I am contemplating hypnosis. Annon8765

I'm so hangry!

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Going through the kitchen in search of food, giving up, then lowering my standards and looking again. bibi-chocobun

I do this ALL THE TIME!!!!

I open the fridge, look around, take a mental note of what is there and close the doors and walk away. an hour later i come back and open the fridge, look around and think of what i might want... as if my stomach wants it, but my brain says no. tunersharkbitten

Look at the people...

Analyzing other people when I'm out in public. I enjoy trying to figure out who they are just by what I see. DARKcsb

I like doing this with my mom.

We would guess "who went with who" at the food court in the mall when I was growing up. We would look at people with their trays of food and try to guess who their significant other was waiting at the table.

My mom was almost always right. It's a fond memory :) girlroseghost

Staying mute...

I'm addicted to avoiding phone calls. QiNavigator

I purposefully reply to texts with at least hour delay so it's not fishy that I am never able to accept any calls.OresteiaCzech

I found a reality series...

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Donating sperm to lesbians.

I started off donating to some friends then they began recommending me to other lesbians through a FB group.

It's so rewarding and I've fathered 7 so far. Socialist7

Thank you for reading! 

Reading creepy stories on Reddit, which I guess isn't that strange. Alec122

And then regretting it when you try to sleep? Because that's what I do. CautiousMusic

REDDIT

Sam Tabone/WireImage via Getty Images, Paul Archuleta/FilmMagic via Getty Images

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If you talk to anyone studying English as a second language, they'll tell you how hard it is to learn. If you grew up speaking English as your only language, it probably doesn't seem that difficult; but as a bilingual native English speaker who learned a second language later in life I can tell you, English is WEIRD!

English has so many inconsistencies in spelling, pronunciation, verb conjugation...don't get me started. American English, UK English, and Australian English all spell things differently and the same word can have completely different meanings or connotations.

It wasn't until my freshman year of high school when I started learning Japanese, in which a word is always pronounced exactly like it looks like it should be, that I gained a real understanding of how hard English would be for someone to try to learn as a second language. Even as a native speaker who loves the English language and writes for a living, I sometimes struggle with its many homophones (there, their, and they're, for example) and grammatical inconsistencies. Even our mnemonics that are taught in school to help remember these differences don't always hold true. "I before E, except after C" is something most American children are taught in elementary school, but what about neighbor, weight, and veil?

Redditor STUDkatz asked:

What's something weird about English (or another language) that native speakers don't think about?

Below, you'll find an assortment of the weird quirks of the language that you've probably never thought about.

My Brain Hurts

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English might be difficult. It can be understood through tough thorough thought though.

-SpeeeeedBoost

It's Right, But Why?

A native speaker has a knowledge of implicit grammar (through learning naturally as a child) that would require an adult years to study and review.

You're spewing out the correct answer but god help you if someone asks you to show your work.

-BaanThai

I am an editor and I still sometimes have trouble when asked why something should be a certain way. I just KNOW it's wrong (or correct) and I can't always explain why.

-Lil-Maece

It took until i was 16 to realize there's actually a rule to figure out if you should use a or an... Before that (and admittedly since) I was just going with the one that didn't sound dumb out loud

-booneruni

Unnecessary Combination

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People assume a lot of silly things, such as words that can be combined always are.

Examples: "Yeah I maybe doing that later." or "I do that everyday."

I want to punch myself for writing that.

-PM_ME_A_PLANE_TICKET

Running A Bit Long

Run has hundreds of uses (forms). Last I checked it was a little over 250. You run a program, you run over toads in your car, the chicken run has a duck in it, The ads run too long on the TV, you run out of toilet paper, you run down to the shop in the car, you run up a bill at the shop after the assistant gave you the run around. You run into a friend but you have to run home as you had the runs and something was running down your leg. You run to the toilet but you run into a problem. Your kid is running a lemonade stand in the doorway. You're now running a little brown cable along your path. You hope nobody takes a picture and runs it in the paper as you are running for office. Your stance is against gun runners but you're hauling a little brown nuke right now. I've run out but there's more.

-PapaOoMaoMao

Sometimes The Joke Is In The Translation

Pakistani urdu-english speaker, there are a LOT of words that are absolutely hilarious when taken in the context of english but my 2 favorite have to be which is a letter in the urdu alphabet and is pronounced exactly like "Meme" and another which is a punjabi name which is literally spelled and pronounced "Butt", there is also a national level bakery brand called "Butt"

Urdu is a great language

-Theodoric___

Strength Or Weakness?

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There is a common nine letter word with only a single vowel in English.

That word is "strengths".

-Wobbles42

Ordered Descriptors

Adjectives have a specific order they are supposed to be arranged. For example, you would never say the green large five dragons. You would say the five large green dragons. The order that English typically follows for adjectives is:

1. Quantity or number

2. Quality or opinion

3. Size

4. Age

5. Shape

6. Color

7. Proper adjective

8. Purpose or qualifier

-TinkerTailorSoldjur

Rhymes with Confusion

Read and lead rhyme and so do read and lead, but read and lead don't rhyme and neither do read and lead.

-LinnyFlower

About Time You Realized It

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I never really appreciated the word "about" until I started learning French and realized there are about a couple dozen different words you have to learn about where in English we would just say "about." It's just about one of the most versatile and useful words we have.

-schnit123

Confusing Combos

Native English speaker here.

How irritatingly complex and nuanced English (and other Germanic languages) verbs are for having tons of common verbs that change meaning completely or only subtly with one flip of a preposition and sometimes even more so by stacking a few more on.

Put + on, in, out, off, toward, into, forth, away, up, up with, down, past

Set + on, off, out, in, up, down

Run + off, on, out, into, away, up, down, over, at, through

Take + on, out, in, away, up, over, off

Break + in, out, up, down, up with, into, out of away

Give + up, out, away, in, out

Get + on, in, out, up, down, away, away with, along, by, back, through, across, over, into, at

Work + up, up to, out, through

Come + in, out, by, across, through, over, at

Do + in, away with, over, up

Hang + up, in, out, out with, over, with, off, back

Then ones where the options are fewer, they're either somewhat related or *not at all*.

Chat vs chat someone up.

Make something up vs make out.

This list isn't exhaustive because I got tired of thinking but I've heard many a friend moan and groan about how every combination seems like a whole new word or phrase to memorize. That even if it looks familiar, they can't trust it. Most other languages just have a unique word for each idea or at least morphology that is somehow linked. Work + through makes sense in that it implies you're belaboring or in the midst of resolving something (imagine pushing *through* something). So some make at least a little logical sense. Put + up + with has no clue in it that it means to endure or tolerate. Come + over is just like "went from toward me above something?"

Set + off (an alarm) makes no sense at all. Isn't it actually going *on*?

Break + in (to use a new item for the first time, implying the start of the process of making it yours) — just "breaking" your boots is bad but if you do it on the inside, it's desired?

Give + out as in, "my car's engine gave out." (went kaput) Did it hand you a piece of candy?

If repeating doing something is "doing something over," then what do these mean:

"coming over"

"handing over"

"taking over"

"getting over"

At least in languages like Spanish that are better stocked in the logic department, these all are treated as different ideas that they are.

Venir a visitar

Entregar

Encargarse de

Superar

EDIT: Spelling mistakes and additional examples.

-stanographer

H/T: Reddit

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