You swallowed what....

In my case, it was when she came into the bathroom crying to tell me she had just swallowed her wedding ring. And four other rings.

She took them off while painting, and put them in a shot glass on the counter for safe keeping. The next morning she went to take her pills, which she also keeps in a shot glass on the counter. We were on poop watch for 5 days until we got them all back. dlordjr

Like a Serial Killer....

I used to get annoyed with how he ate Kit Kats, yanno just biting into it without snapping pieces off, but then I watched him peel an orange super carefully just to bite into it like it was an apple. forestmoon_

Tell him congrats on infiltrating the human race. MTAlphawolf

Just Sip! 

My BF regularly chokes on water. He drinks a lot of it. He fill his mouth with water and then swallows it in parts like a crazy person. He says that he forgets it's there sometimes and just breaths in. I love him and he's a smart guy but this is so dumb. I just imagine I'll come home one day and he's dead on the floor with an empty bottle beside him. I'd be very upset but also kind of angry. TheSadSalsa

Life's natural gel....

To wash her hair - she puts mud in it. Swears by it. Even seems to work. Still. Allisade

And how does her hair smell? NorskChef

Very nice actually, clay dust (mud) actually works pretty well for her hair... but it's still weird =) Allisade

Brush Vigorously!

He brushes his teeth so vigorously and intensely that he gags himself nonstop for two full minutes.

AGHAGH-ECK-UHHH-AGHKA-AKUGH-PFL-AK

It sounds like a dog eating wet food too quickly and then puking it back up on the carpet. Like a cat coughing up a hair ball, eating it, and coughing it up again. You can hear it from the kitchen, the living room, the hall outside the apartment door, and probably the parking lot. It is truly a mesmerizing and terrifying ordeal. 14kanthropologist

Good Boy.... 

I was sad, so my husband decided to go to his garden and brought me a big lemon. I have no idea why, but it made me laugh, especially since the Jack Russell we had at the time thought it was a ball and wanted my husband to throw it. Dragonsrule18

Whatever floats your boat.....

I cannot be sure of this, and I never asked her... but I'm fairly certain I've walked in on an ex masturbating to pimple popping videos. It happened twice... I'd like to think she was just masturbating and not paying attention to what she was watching, as some people do. Very specific thing to youtube as background noise though. Daintyoaktree

I can't breathe! 

There was a brown stain on our comforter from the dog that had a good chance of being poop. To find out she brought the blanket up to her face and inhaled deeply with her nose buried in the fabric. Like a brewer smelling hops, she then proclaimed it wasn't poop. But you didn't know that until you buried your face in it! Deathrial

This is no Home! 

When I showed him the double wide trailer I grew up in he looked at me stunned and asked "Where's the wheels?" After several confused moments and numerous questions I realized that he thought RVs were the same thing as trailer homes. He was very relieved to find out my family (9 people) were not all living in an RV for 17 years. Astyyria

Can you wear socks?

My boyfriend's toes. He doesn't have like the elongated bits, he literally has just little round balls at the end of his feet. Like he can't wiggle or stretch them and he didn't even realize that wasn't normal until he saw mine.

Edit: So it's now Monday, I said I will have pic on Sunday, apologies.

I was with my boyfriend last night until this morning and I mentioned I needed a picture of his toes for the Redditors. However, he isn't very happy with me, as I mentioned he didn't realize how weird his toes were until we started dating. I'm his first GF so he hasn't had that much to compare to I guess? Well anyway now he is upset because he is now very worried about his weird toes and is feeling insecure about them. He spent an hour mentioning 'are my toes really that weird?' He won't allow me to post a photo of his toes but said I can use the meme one I mentioned in a reply as he says it's a nice angle and I shall draw a diagram on MS paint. Hopefully my two years of life drawing will come in use.

Rowanx3

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