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Doctors Divulge The Medical Questions They Wish Their Friends Hadn't Asked Them

person using laptop computer and green stethoscope nearby
National Cancer Institute on Unsplash

Reddit user Geraltthegrey asked: "Doctors of reddit, what is a medical question a friend has asked you that you wish they hadn't?"

Some professions seem to inspire people to ask for advice or insight. Medicine is high—if not at the top—on that list.

Once people find out a person is a medical professional, they often ask for an impromptu diagnosis or treatment recommendations.


And some of the questions can be very uncomfortable.

Reddit user Geraltthegrey asked:

"Doctors of Reddit, what is a medical question a friend has asked you that you wish they hadn't?"

No One Wants To See That

"I'm going to go with the time that my uncle sent me an unsolicited picture of his anus asking if 'this' was 'a hemorrhoid or not'."

"Just sent me a picture out of nowhere, and then a few minutes later followed it up with the explanation."

~ InvestingDoc

Shooting The Messenger

"Wishing I had a funny or less depressing answer, but in training I ended up diagnosing and eventually confirming cancer in a hometown friend when he asked me why he sweats through his sheets every night.

"Cancer free and in remission now, but also doesn’t talk to me anymore."

~ LonelySeeds24

Nope!

"Mum's friend showed me her MRI scans at a dinner party ahead of seeing her neurologist. The report and pics showed features consistent with multiple sclerosis."

"There was no way I was having that conversation with her, so I feigned stupidity and said it was outside my knowledge area and told her to discuss it with her doctor instead."

"My mom was mad at me for pretending to be dumb. I made it clear that under no circumstances would I be giving any ad hoc medical advice to her friends moving on."

~ Unusual-Ear5013

Hard Truth

"I have a story of the reverse. I asked my doctor friend about my brain MRI. Had one done to investigate why my voice was so f*cked up, and being a nerd I looked at my scan when I got home."

"I texted the friend and asked them what is white and hazy on a brain scan, so they offered to look at the files. I sent it over. Their response was so professional and telling."

"I was diagnosed with brain cancer a month later. This was about 3 years ago—my cancer was treated and I'm still stable. My voice was unrelated and probably an after effect of COVID."

"I still think about the fact my friend probably knew what was up with my brain that day.... must have been hard."

~ souless_ginger84

Not Idle Curiosity

"Friend of my then boyfriend asked me 'How do you know if you have Syphilis?' out of the blue one day."

"I asked him why he was wondering and he said he was just curious. Sure Bert, sure, we‘re all curious."

"But if you think you NEED to know if you have Syphilis, the chances are high you have been engaging in Syphilis-enhancing behavior and should get yourself and your downstairs area checked out."

"He went to the doctor. He had Syphilis."

~ tryingisbeautiful

Turn And Cough

"Got my dad’s doctor friend to check my balls for cancer when I was 14 and found a lump."

"He actually said, 'Let the dog see the rabbit' when I was dropping trou and it made me laugh, so that was good."

"Turns out a lot of guys just have lumps on their balls. And also that doctors genuinely don’t give a f*ck if you’re their mate’s son. They just see the case, which was quite interesting."

"His daughter had a crush on me (and was friends with my sister) and all I was thinking about on the way home was 'Is he going to tell her about my member now?'."

"Man, I was stupid."

~ what_is_blue

Honest Information

"The patient, my wife, had a cloudy spot on a brain MRI. They told us it is likely some astrocytoma (brain tumor)."

"My best friend is a radiologist, so I talked to him about it. He explained there are 4 grades. Grade 1 is more common in kids. Grade 2 and 3 are random distributed in the population. Then he says Grade 4 is for 'old white guys' and if you get it, you're done."

"We laugh because my wife is not an 'old white guy' so she'll probably have grade 2 or 3 which surgery and chemo can work for. About a week later we got lab results from biopsy."

"My wife had Grade 4 Glioblastoma Multiforme which the average life expectancy is something like 18 months. It was the kind that repairs itself rapidly from chemo."

"My wife lasted pretty near 18 months and then passed away."

"I'm sure my buddy regrets the flippant way he had described the possible outcomes to me, but the 'no bullsh*t' talk is kinda how he and I communicate so it didn't damage our relationship."

~ eoattc

Sorry, Mom

"My mother once called me because she hurt her ankle and wanted to know if it was broken or just sprained."

"Then she got mad at me when I said that A) I’m a nurse in B) a completely unrelated field and C) no one can differentiate a sprain from a simple fracture over the phone without an x-ray or at least an exam."

~ calloooohcallay

Pass

"My wife’s cousin wanted me to see if his testicles had shrank from using steroids."

"I politely declined."

~ nycemt83

No Sugarcoating

"I am not a doctor, but I am a respiratory therapist."

"During one of the waves of COVID, one of our lab tech's mom was admitted and was on a BiPAP with COVID. One night, while we were both working, she asked me how her mom was doing."

"I told her I didn't want to tell her because I was not going to lie to her. She told me she wanted to know."

"'Everyone I have had on this high of settings on the BiPAP has died. That's not to say we aren't going to keep trying, but I want to be realistic with you'."

"She started crying. She had just lost her grandmother a week prior, so this was pretty rough. Up until that point, apparently no one had been honest enough to tell her just how serious her mom's COVID was."

~ pwg2

Not The Right Source

"Not a doctor, but rather a critical care paramedic. I had a long time friend ask me to clarify notes she received from her boyfriend’s oncology visit."

"Just asking me to translate medical speak."

"It was one of the worst reports I’ve ever seen and I was amazed he was still alive. She was super hopeful and obviously wanting the best outcome."

"I gently told her that I was not the one to go over the report with her. He passed about a week later."

~ redundantposts

Kindness

"Let me start by saying this was almost 20 years ago and I was not the medical person, but at the time I was starting classes for my CNA."

"At the time my grandfather was being treated for lung cancer and I had asked one of my teachers about what metastasis in the liver meant, which was how I found out my grandfather wasn't going to beat the cancer."

"To his credit, when the teacher figured out why I was asking about it, he was exceedingly kind, but it was obviously really upsetting for both of us at the time."

"About 3 months later my grandpa passed peacefully at home with his family there. While it was really hard to hear at the time, I'm grateful for that teacher telling me the truth so I was able to make good use of the time I had left with my grandpa."

~ s-c-g1

How Did He Not Know?

"Not a proper doctor but I'm a retired combat medic and I've been asked a couple of odd questions.

"At a Christmas party for a charity that my ex used to work with, I got chatting to the charity's founder, naturally we got round to 'Oh, you're X's partner? You're not in education too? Oh cool, uh, if you don't mind taking a look at something for me...'."

"He'd slipped on the stairs a few days earlier, bit of an ache in his upper arm, wasn't sure it was worth going to a doctor. I took a look for him because why not, I'm accommodating."

"His humerus was broken. Midway, by the feel of it, clear through the bone. Not displaced, but it was grinding a bit when he moved his arm. That was a fun one to explain."

~ ParticlesInSunlight

Regrets

"Nurse here...I had to interpret my mother's MRI results to her since they popped up in MyChart before she could talk to her doctor."

"It showed metastatic brain lesions from her intraocular lymphoma, which was terminal. I've never regretted being in the medical field more than I was in that moment."

~ WednesdayGrewUp

Have you had a friend ask an uncomfortable question you wish they hadn't?

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