People Describe The Worst Thing They Found In Their Parents' Closet

It's been a pleasure.

The Castle Turret

"Me, my sister and a friend of ours went hunting around our parents room. Found our mom's pink sex toy. We didn't know what it was so we took it to her to ask her."

"She told us it was part of a strawberry shortcake castle, but since we found it she would not be getting the rest of the pieces, as punishment for snooping around. We believed her."

"My dad was laughing his @ss off the entire time."

– im_not_really_batman

The Appendage

"I found a huge rubber sex toy, and my mom saw me finding it. I was probably about 8 or 9, we were going through some old luggage and she must’ve forgotten it was there. I asked what it was, and she just said it was my dad’s, and took it. For some time after that I thought my dad’s penis was detachable."

– The_Moon_Piece

Nowhere To Go

"Not my parents closet but once I found handcuffs to their bed railing and like a dumb child I handcuffed myself to it. Even more f'ked up, my parents had to call 911 because they couldn't find the key, and then my parents had to go to court to prove that they were sex cuffs lol."

– muddywaterz

Kissing The Backstreet Boys

"As little children, maybe 4 or 5 years old, my sisters and I found a box with a bunch of lotions, chocolates, and other weird items. I now know it was my parents' naughty box. Amongst all of the items, there were a pair of purple rubber lips."

"My sisters and I proceeded to practice kissing with it, not knowing what it was. I remember, we pretended like we were kissing The Backstreet Boys. We put the lips back and forgot about it."

"Years later, when we were all teens, we were watching some documentary series and this episode was on sex toys. Those same exact purple lips came up on the screen that I had kissed all those years ago as a child."

"Apparently, those purple rubber lips are used to simulate fellatio. Like a mouth fleshlight. As soon as my sisters and I saw them come on the screen we all simultaneously remembered what we did as children. I wanted to rip my mouth off of my body."

– squishycookie

Dad's been keeping secrets.

The Addiction

"Hundreds, maybe even over a thousand, lottery tickets. We were dirt poor. Dad earned more than I do as an adult (and I’m pushing into middle class, if not in it already) and we were still living poor as hell. Family found out where all the money would go."

– RevaniteN7

Traumatic Footage

"Unbeknownst to me, my dad taped over my SNL: Best of Chris Farley VHS. My best bud found it, in their closet, and we were stoked to watch it."

"It was my dad banging my step mom. By the time I realized what I was watching and leaping for the 'eject' button"

– ottoman76

Some kids found hidden merchandise that may or may not have been intended for them.

Specialty Garments

"Thong underwear for men that were shaped like Tucans and Elephants… I’ll let you imagine what you part of the body went into the nose and trunk of those animals… my dumb @ss thought they were masks and I put them in my face."

– salsasharks

Lost In The Mail

"A few packages i ordered on amazon that she claimed never arrived.

"Main things i remember was a small husky plush that was meant as a bday gift, a ethernet cable and a new backpack for me."

"There were few other things she stole i cant remember. But yea I've cut my egg donor outta my life after finding she left 2 k in bills in my name and due to the age of em i couldnt do sh*t lol."

– caileran

Racey Manual

"When I was in Junior High, my buddy Sean found 'The Book!' A 1970s sex guide with pics of a Hippie dude and chick doing it in every position."

– Tomegunn1

Hey, parents have their secret lives too.

And if they were adamant about forbidding their curious children to go exploring mommy and daddy's closet, they were only doing it to protect them from everlasting trauma.

Because children aren't the only ones with play things.

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