There are many boundaries that shouldn't be crossed when it comes to having sex, and that includes getting under the sheets with a person who is spoken for.
That doesn't stop everyone from acting on lustful impulses in the heat of the moment with a consenting partner.
Curious to hear from those who were cognizant of their indiscretion, Redditor theedriplomat asked:
"Men who knowingly slept with married women, what pushed you?"
Some guys just can't control themselves.
Tit For Tat
"Her husband was sleeping with my wife. So fair game."
– funnyora**hole
"My mom’s ex husband cheated on her with her cousin. Her cousins husband then came to her and said that they should 'Get them back.' My mom declined."
– Froggymushroom22
A Fatal Flaw
"I have a strong moral compass but a weak lie detector."
– Not_a-Robot_
“We’re separated. We sleep in separate rooms”
– karma2879
"I'm ashamed how easily this worked on me...even though she was still wearing a wedding ring ('to ward off creeps'). I'm dumb."
– cheeriodust
"It's not unusual for actually separated couples to still wear the ring on principle that they're still married."
– hoagiejabroni
"I wore mine on my necklace until I knew it was completely over then just have it as a keepsake now. Kinda want to sell it but it’s a true memory of like half my life."
– DJheddo
One Side Of The Story
"She told me they had an open marriage. She had an open marriage. Her husband did not."
– hellosillypeopl
"Same. Met on a swinger's website when I was in Gibraltar. Came to my hotel and rushed into the elevator and into my room. After deed was done she hurriedly got dressed again because she needed to go shopping before her husband knew she wasn't."
"He had no idea she was sleeping around."
"I didn't feel great about that."
"I should clarify I didn't know she was cheating either. Her profile was set up as a couples profile. The red flag I should have noticed was there were no pictures of him."
– BuryEdmundIsMyAlias
Dishonest Women
"I met a few women over the years that claimed this sh*t. I didn't want to put myself in the middle of something like that so never went for it but they were in friend groups. I remember one that would bring different dates while we all went to bars and stuff then another that was sleeping with coworkers."
"Not a husband in sight usually."
"One found out when a guy I know showed up to one of their houses and asked her husband's permission to sleep with his wife after a few drinks. It didn't go well. The other got caught out with another dude."
– Warm-Iron-1222
The False Premise
"Told me they were separated. They were not! Did not find that out for a bit!"
– Gerreth_Gobulcoque
"Woman told me she was finalizing her divorce so we started a strictly hook up relationship. 3 months had passed and no update on her divorce, so one day I decided to look her up on Facebook, well, she had just posted a family pic 3 days ago. Called her out and she said she’s fixing her marriage… woman, we just hooked up two days ago.. I don’t think you’re doing much fixing."
"We hung out one last time and I told her she needed to cut me off to fully fix her marriage unless, it doesn’t as fixing, it’s just getting your needs met while putting on a façade, so we ended things."
– No_Anteater8156
A Guy's Preference
"There is a guy at my gym who strictly tries sleeping with married women. Knows they won’t tell anyone and keeps his cheating on his baby mama on the down low cuz he doesn’t ever bring them home."
– LobabyChick
The Sympathy Card
"Told me she was leaving an emotionally abusive husband, was splitting up and didn’t know how to, or how to support her kids without him. All over 6 months."
"Like a fool, I took her in emotionally and did what i could to support her."
"It was all lie. She had told the same thing to multiple other guys over years, that they were her soulmates, she needed help, she was being abused."
"And it took me 5 years to get over the lies, the manipulation, the cheating, and the emotional mess she left me in."
– XoCCeT
Self-Obtained Permission
"Just so beautiful. I thought if she was willing to go out on her marriage, for me, things must not be right for her and I'm just so worth it, I imagined that marriage was the mistake, not cheating. Immature me got some validation for my wanton ego."
– Plasma_Cosmo_9977
"I think everyone has fallen for this trap in some way or another, like 'fighting' over a man/woman with another person. I remember in college me and this other girl had a crush on the same guy. The guy knew this, and was sort of casually dating both of us (or at the very least leading us both on)."
"At some point, we both put our foot down and basically told him he could only have one of us, and after days of consideration, he picked me. I remember feeling so elated, like I was 'better' than her because he chose me. It wasn’t until much later when I realized all that meant was I dated someone who was indecisive and wasn’t sure about me from the start."
– PennilessPirate
Blame It On Youth
"In my early 20s, I just didn't care. My thought process was 'it's not me cheating'. As I've gotten older (and having since been cheated on), I know that's a sh**ty way to be. It's not something I want to be a part of doing to anyone else- making them feel the way I did when I found out I was cheated on."
– cfutrell84
"Similar for me. Did it, didn’t know the guy, thought it was her choice and responsibility and just sort of glossed over it."
"Realized after the fact that it was also f'king up my own ability to trust my own partners and had to swear off doing it because I wanted to have my own decent relationships."
– froggerslogger
Periodic Love Trysts
"I Know a guy in his 40s who regularly drives hours to meet up with his high school 'first' to f'k in a hotel room. They sneak bc she's long-term married with kids. He said something to me along the lines of, 'Yeah, I told her she really shouldn't be doing that to her family.' Yet he is happy to assist and feels no responsibility."
– shaneacton1
"I know a 'couple' in a similar situation in mid 30’s. They faked around in high school, and both moved away separately, got married, and had kids. They drive a couple of hours each way back to their hometown and f'k in a cheap motel, leaving the spouses at home with the kids."
"My cousin works the reception and tells the family group chat every time they come by, and it’s been going on for at least ten years now."
"Like at this point they should just divorce the spouses and get together full time. Ten. Year. Affair. That’s nuts."
– owlsandmoths
A Deliberate Pursuit
"I swear, being married is a kink for some guys - like they want that married woman to be so hot for them she's willing to risk it all just for them."
"I have a friend who almost exclusively dates/f'ks women who are either married or are in long-term relationships. We would joke about it being his kink, but after a couple of years, we realized that was exactly what was going on."
"This one woman I was friends with started seeing him on the side. She eventually left her fiance for him, and then he wanted nothing to do with her anymore - like she wasn't even attractive to him after she became single."
– will_write_for_tacos
Some people will make up excuses, like feigning ignorance over a partner's marital status, to ultimately get what they want.
While being clandestine about it all can be erotically thrilling. Cheating spouses are flirting with disaster.
Unfortunately, many deceitful people don't realize until it's too late that they had something good with their marriage.
Is it worth it?
Keith Pedersen/Facebook
