The path to finding a romantic partner is littered with landmines.
As they are invisible, they are easily detonated. People may inadvertently tread on one of your personal emotional landmines, and that's it. It's over.
Or sometimes they just live in a field of landmines.
u/_CAD3_ asked:
What makes you immediately lose romantic interest in someone?
Here were some of the answers.
Hogging All The Sympathy
If they constantly make you feel bad for them. Felt so bad and was so worried about him for so long that the one time I needed the emotion I couldn't have it.
It Doesn't Make You Cool
If they say the words "I know I'm an *sshole/b**ch". Like okay I'll take your word for it. Also if it becomes apparent that they have no self-awareness.
C'mon, Brittany
Ghosting you then suddenly popping up out of the blue when they want attention. Yes Brittany I know what is happening when you call me, you're scraping the bottom of the barrel and I resent being the bottom.
You're A Grown Adult
Doing dumb things and should know better. We had a new guy join our Friday social group. Very nice guy. Attractive. At the bar, he took his old gum out of his mouth and stuck it to the bottom of the table. Really? So trashy.
Oddly Specific
If they ask how many cavities I have had throughout my life and then check my mouth like they're buying a horse.
Edit: so a little story to go with it, I was working in a food distribution facility, in the produce department picking orders. She was an office worker, sales rep. She was a Chinese girl that managed all the Chinese accounts because she was the only one that can communicate with them and put their orders in properly, a tall leggy young woman. I had been to her place for a few friendly Gatherings with her friends, no other co-workers. We decided to go out to dinner end through conversation at dinner we ended up at dentist and Dentistry. That's when she asked the question about my cavities. I explained that I had cavity prone teeth with weak enamel. That's when she wanted to see inside my mouth. She even said the word "open" when she couldn't get a good look at the molars on the top row. In my mind I think she was assessing the financial cost of taking me on as a boyfriend. After that exchange though, for me it was friends only.
More Time Outside Your Own Head
Selfishness. I am very considerate of others and I am slowly learning that I think I need someone that is too.
Anything? Bueller?
When they have seemingly no opinion, no voice. When every answer is "I don't care" or "I don't know." Like Jesus Christ I'm trying to find out what you like so that we can talk. Gimme something!
A Grossout Process
Chewing tobacco. I'm also not a fan of smoking, but it's not necessarily an instant deal breaker like chewing tobacco is. The truth is, I have seen too many men who would sit there and chew tobacco and then spit it into an empty Dr. Pepper bottle, and it grosses me out more than I can express.
People Explain The Worst Thing That's Ever Happened To Them On Their Birthday
Where Are Your Nice Cars?
Went out with a guy once who talked 90% of the time, 85% of that being about how much money he had made, how much he spent on his now ex wife, all the nice cars he had... I picked HIM up because he didn't have a ride to meet up. He was legitimately confused why I didn't want to spend the night with him when I went to drop him off. Never saw him ever again.
Once Again, Weirdly Specific
Telling me who I can or can't be friends with. Screams insecurity, and raises the question of why I shouldn't be friends with them. If they were my friends from before, why are you trying to get me to cut ties? If they are your friends from before, what have you told them that you don't want them to tell me about?
Constantly comparing me to your ex. I'm not them. If you want me to be them, break up with me and get back together with them.
Trying to change me because it's "sexier". No, I will not start smoking because you think it's hot. Sorry.
Not being able to take no for an answer, even with little things. If they don't listen when you say you don't want to eat x because you don't like it/are allergic/aren't in the mood for it, what makes you think your opinion is going to matter later with bigger things?
