Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Break Down The Best Way To Make Friends As A 'Thirty Something'

People Break Down The Best Way To Make Friends As A 'Thirty Something'
Free-Photos from Pixabay

With the responsibilities of careers and family and children, it can feel tough to make friends when you're over 30. The days of running up to randos on the playground and saying, "Wanna be friends?" might be far behind us, but that doesn't mean it's impossible to make friends.

NOTE: Remember to follow this advice in a post-COVID world, as safely as possible.


Reddit user, u/Llamatomb, wanted to learn some new tips and tricks when they asked:

"How do you make friends when you're 30+?"

Just Be More Open

Homer Simpson Hug GIF by Animation Domination Giphy

"Join clubs of activities you enjoy."

"Talk to the people at your job."

"Write a message to your old classmates or friends."

"Meet your neighbours."

R3makea

"I think about 80-90% of friendships are formed based on circumstance. They're coworkers, frequent customers, or neighbors. The other 10-20% are the familial friendships and friends from the past"

Ahstia

Look For Any Kind Of Connecting Thread

"My story; I recently switched jobs and I hadn't met any of my coworkers due to corona."

"I saw a coworkers Volvo V60 (my dream car) was up for grabs and I was the only one who showed interest in taking it, so I went by his house to see it; We started talking and it turned out we shared a lot of common interests; BBQ, Beers, Whiskey & [cigars]. He mentioned that he and some other coworkers had a little club and they got together for slowcooking sessions! I instanly became best friends with half the management at my company!"

Th3_Accountant

Baby Steps

"Started therapy this year and that seems to be going well. I bought a bass guitar which makes me interact with people at the music store because I have no idea what I'm doing with it yet. I also get my car washed twice a week so that I can tip the car wash person $5 and ask them to put my other mirror in because I can't reach it."

"Baby steps."

warWITHINtheGIRL

Shift Up The Meeting Priorities

"I'm not 30+ yet (28), but I've had good luck with just dating. We're all pretty lonely and if you go into the first date with the attitude to find a friend rather than a life-long companion, you'll usually have some pretty good luck."

GourdofThunder

Go On. Learn Something.

"If you like languages, a language group/meetings may be a good way. They usually also include foreigners who are also looking for new friends."

Pinglak

Let's All Go To The Sports Ball Games

"Post-COVID advice, of course."

"Check out meetups first your hobbies. Even if they seem like solo hobbies. Book clubs, running clubs, etc. most of my friends now are from a running club. They are amazing and really fun folks."

"Get new hobbies. What I like as an older adult is different than what I liked as a teenager."

"This is an important note : I HATED sports growing up and was terrible at them. But I just decided to go for it But I started playing sports where no one cared if you were good (running is good since it literally doesn’t hurt anyone else if you’re slow) and other sports with a lot of adult beginners. Aka, adulthood is a bad time to start playing soccer, but great for curling, hockey, running, cycling."

"Like other said, say yes to invitations."

GirlsLikeStatus

You Don't Even Have To Talk At First

"get involved in activities were you will see the same people on a regular basis. You have that activity in common at least and maybe create friendship from there."

-castle-bravo-

"to paraphrase C.S. Lewis "lovers stand face to face but friends stand side to side". You find friends in common interests and activities."

Delta_pdx

You Only Hang Out When Your Kids Hang Out

happy homer simpson GIF Giphy

"I feel like the catch 22 is this: Being a parent makes it easier, because you have a natural connection to others - kids the same age, play dates, etc. Buuuuut being a parent means you have so little time and energy for friendship, so it's kind of a wash"

peppermntn

Aw, I Have To Go To Classes To Better Myself?

"Some of these are difficult at the moment - coz Covid - but I’ve picked up friends along the way from the following:"

  • "Exercise classes (note - I suspect this works better for females than males): any class which is not expressly aimed at a certain age group, eg. if you’re 30, joining “Fab After 50” or “Mature Bums” (OK, I made that one up) isn’t likely to attract your direct peer group. However, general classes advertised as for all abilities tend to attract all manners of shapes, sizes, ages, experiences, etc., and it’s difficult to NOT find yourself chatting to people, which can turn into a friendship over time. For dudes, I’d recommend team sports as opposed to classes."
  • "Educational classes: veering towards “discussional” courses, such as the social sciences, humanities, arts, etc., where classmate interaction is encouraged, or even required. Or hobbyist classes such as pottery, painting, wood crafts, and so on. You’re (probably) less likely to pick up firm friends in classes aimed at a particular professional accreditation - as the students are just there to get that under their belt - but it’s obviously not impossible."
  • "Volunteering and/or picking up a small extra casual job, if your “real” job isn’t giving you the interactions you desire."
Emergency_Town3366

Oh Yeah. Jobs.

"Co-workers you really get along, can have fun, and have things in common with are hard to come by it seems, but it happens. 3 of us had been going to the bar for a beer or 2 before heading home after work most Fridays for a bit before Covid forced the bar by work to cut its hours and open later."

TheMightyIrishman

Go With A Book And Be Ready To Put It Down

"My boyfriend works at a local brewery, he's 30, I'm 26. A lot of the regular customers there are in their 50s, a lot of single men and women who would just go there, bring a book, order a beer, sit at the bar, and chat with people who sat by them. Some of our best friends are regulars there."

"I spent a lot of this summer at backyard fires at a 50 something year olds place talking about his army days, and he's just a guy who was bored at home so started going to his local brewery for a beer every weekend."

"I know it's hard with covid right how, but there's nothing wrong with going to a brewery or pub alone with a book and chatting with anyone who's down to chat."

PistachioMaru

Never Say No

  1. "If you have at least one friend, or know any other humans that you feel you can stand for longer than a few hours, find similar interests you have and this can lead to them introducing you to other people with the same interest (music, sports, gaming, etc.)"
  2. "NEVER turn down an invitation. Even if you're not feeling up to it, or feeling lazy, just go. You can always leave if you're not feeling it. But perhaps you might end up meeting someone who has the potential for friendship!"

"Its obviously hard now with COVID and so many social restrictions, but hang in there!"

Ftw_dabs69ish

Learn From All Age Groups

"Don’t limit yourself to an age group. Older people in general and who have nothing to prove can end up being your most supportive. They can also mentor you. And you can give them energy and cultural updates to keep them in the know. I’m 68 and my fiancé is 81 and we often have more energy than those under 50. And we have lots of stuff, good stuff, we want to share or give away and we have. A win for each other. And we don’t judge as we have probably been there."

Icy-Independence3621

Reciprocate The Effort

"If someone makes an effort to get to know you better, reciprocate the effort and find out what they're interested in. If you find something in common, then do whatever it happens to be with them (ie gaming, working out, etc...) and use the common interest as a bridge to do other stuff together."

"Honestly way better at making friends now than I was in my teens or 20s as well because I've basically accepted I am who I am as well instead of trying to be someone who I'm not"

watermelonpizzafries

When You Give Back, The Universe Gives To You

Greeting Season 3 GIF by The Simpsons Giphy

"I felt lost when my Marriage ended. So I volunteered in the community , And found myself, found new friends, and found a sense of purpose for my spare time. Now, three years later when I go walking in the neighbourhood, I can say hello to a great number of people and I never feel alone. More than that, I'm hanging out with great people that also want to help the neighbourhood. In conclusion, Try volunteering."

sarudesu

Be bold, be brave, and don't be afraid to let someone new into your life.

Want to "know" more?

Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.

Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Nicole Kidman
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon/X; AMC Theatres/YouTube

Nicole Kidman Reveals She Did That Much-Memed AMC Ad For Free—And Fans Are Stunned

Four years ago, Practical Magic's Nicole Kidman and a team of producers came together to create a commercial, celebrating community and the movie theatre experience.

While the team wasn't sure if the commercial would be meaningful during the pandemic, it became a cultural phenomenon, resulting in memes, a dedicated SNL skit, and expectations from moviegoers to see the commercial every time they see a new movie at AMC.

Keep Reading Show less
Screenshot of Alex Jones and Nick Fuentes
InfoWars

Alex Jones On The Verge Of Tears In Rant About 'Horrifying' Trump Administration—And No One Has Any Sympathy

InfoWars host and noted conspiracy theorist Alex Jones was on the verge of tears while railing against the "horrifying" Trump administration following President Donald Trump's order for U.S. forces to attack Iran.

The war against Iran is already spreading beyond its initial battlefield. Iranian reprisals have struck Gulf states hosting U.S. bases—including Qatar, the United Arab Emirates, Kuwait and Saudi Arabia—while Hezbollah has entered the fight, firing rockets into Israel and ending a month-long ceasefire.

Keep Reading Show less
Chris Kempczinski (left), CEO of McDonald’s, taste-tests the chain’s new Big Arch burger while Tom Curtis (right), president of Burger King U.S. & Canada, takes a bite of a Whopper in the rival brand’s response video.
@chrisk_mcd/Instagram; @burgerking/TikTok

Burger King Brutally Skewers McDonald's After Video Of CEO Gingerly Taste-Testing Burger Sparks Mockery

Folks, the burger wars are heating up after Burger King seized on an awkward moment involving the McDonald’s CEO taste-testing the company’s newest menu item.

Last month, McDonald’s CEO Chris Kempczinski posted a video in which he tried the brand’s new Big Arch burger.

Keep Reading Show less
Bruce Campbell
Erika Goldring/Getty Images

'Evil Dead' Icon Bruce Campbell Pens Heartfelt Message To Fans After Being Diagnosed With Incurable Cancer

Bruce "The Chin" Campbell has grown quite a fanbase over the years from his part as Ash Williams in Sam Raimi's Evil Dead series. He's also been in cult classics like Crimewave, Maniac Cop, and Bubba Ho-Tep.

Movie lovers may also recognize him from small parts in the Spider-Man universe with Toby Maguire: first as the wrestling ring announcer who introduced him as "Spider-Man" instead of "The Human Spider" and later as a very snooty usher who refused to let Peter Parker in to see Mary Jane perform.

Keep Reading Show less
Ryan Gosling; Jake Hamilton
Jake's Takes/YouTube

Ryan Gosling's Reaction To Being Interviewed By Journalist Who Is Stranded In The Desert Is All Of Us

Celebrities get interviewed from all kinds of places, but the side of the road in a desert? That's not typically one of them.

But for a recent sit-down with Ryan Gosling, that's exactly where Good Day Chicago reporter Jake Hamilton ended up asking his questions. From the side of the road, no less.

Keep Reading Show less