Skip to content

Jesse Ventura Brutally Rips 'Coward' Trump For Avoiding Military Service After Trump Touts Himself As Great Military Leader

Search AI Powered
Human content, AI powered search.

Latest Stories

Funny People Share Things Sure To Instantly Derail A Date

Thomas Dane
By Thomas DaneJul 24, 2018
Thomas Dane
Thomas Dane is a New York City based writer/actor/producer. He has had his plays produced nationally and as an actor has toured internationally. He holds a BA from the International Fine Arts College in Miami, Florida. Currently, you can see him in the Award-winning sex comedy 'Cake.' He loves dogs and is a single Sagittarius. Adele and Madonna are his greatest inspirations... as they should be for the world. Thanks for reading.
See Full Bio
Make us preferred on Google

Funny People Share Things Sure To Instantly Derail A Date

[rebelmouse-image 18350136 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Dating is not for the faint of heart. Running through the muck of the yuck that is out there in the single world can drive anyone to Betty Ford in record time. It feels as though people have completely lost their minds. Literally! You give somebody a chance to only discover that dying alone is actually the life prize instead of dying by the hands of your dinner companion. Especially if they have a familiar resemblance to someone from a recent 'America's Most Wanted' episode.

Redditor _PM_Me_YourTinyBoobs needed everyone to share a couple of dating war stories by asking... _What is one thing you can say to instantly derail a date?

GEOGRAPHICAL LOGISTICS....

Are you sure this place isn't within 500 feet of a school or playground?

ObviousLibertarian

This is a good one wow.

Frungy

Cue police sirens

AnxiuosFox

WHERE'S DAD?

[rebelmouse-image 18350137 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I hope it's ok I brought my mom, too.

ARE WE IN ALABAMA?

[rebelmouse-image 18350138 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"You're like a brother to me. A hot sexy brother."

orionmovere

I was kissing a girl once when she put her hand on my chest, pushed me away slightly, and informed me that she just realized that the weird feeling she'd been suppressing all day was that I reminded her of her cousin.

All I could muster was an "Oh. Uhhh, I'm sorry?" And then she said she had to go, to which I responded that I understood. Helped her gather her stuff, turned on the porch light for her, and went back inside very confused. Makes for a hilarious story for my friends though.

Anardrius

SOUNDS TEMPTING...

[rebelmouse-image 18350139 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Wanna come back to my mom's basement?

I MISS HER TOO AT THE MOMENT...

[rebelmouse-image 18348249 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

I really miss my ex, but she got a restraining order so...

WTFJHILM

You so remind me of my ex, except I hope you're not as much of a bh... now let me tell you in detail what a bh she was....

Mitra-

'I miss my ex, but my aim is improving'

Dailynator

AND MY EYES?

[rebelmouse-image 18978210 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"My last date was cuter, but you at least have huge tits."

SUCH TALENT...

[rebelmouse-image 18978211 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"One time I livestreamed a jar of meat from my garage as it slowly turned into a putrid sludge. Got like 50,000 views on it."

Thankfully I'm married and don't have to deal with that crap anymore.

HONESTY IS A MUST...

[rebelmouse-image 18978213 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

Once went on a date with a guy to a bar. It was going OK. I was just chugging away at my drink while he showed me pictures from his Facebook (exciting right?). I guess he could see I was starting to get a little out of it and then he leans in and whispers "don't worry, I'm not a creeper"

Lol nope g2g.

BUT I HAVE A COUPON!

[rebelmouse-image 18978215 is_animated_gif= dam=1 expand=1]

"It's 200 for the first hour, 150 for every hour thereafter."

Latest News

Newborn baby with full mustache
Trending

Viral Video Of Newborn Baby Allegedly Born With Full Mustache Sparks Flurry Of Hilarious Jokes

Screenshot of Nicole Williams; Abdul El-Sayed
2026 Elections

Michigan Hairdresser Has Iconic Response After She's Asked If Abdul El-Sayed Is 'Too Left-Wing To Win'

Screenshots from @hottgirlseatpickles's TikTok video
Trending

Woman Speaks Out After Her Ex-Boyfriend And Ex-Best Friend Get Engaged Mere Months After Their Breakup

Screenshots from @scrambled.megs3's TikTok
Trending

TikToker Reveals Why She Hated Fridays The Most While She Was Married—And It's Devastating

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Screenshot of Rob Schmitt and Katie Zacharia
Newsmax

Katie Zacharia Just Tried To Blame 'The Media' For Her Ouster As Press Secretary—And Was Hit With An Instant Reality Check

Katie Zacharia, who lasted just five days as President Donald Trump's White House press secretary, was hit with an instant reality check after claiming in a Newsmax interview that "the media" is responsible for her ouster.

Zacharia opened her debut briefing earlier this month with eight minutes of remarks lauding the "energetic president." She also asserted that "attendance is at record highs" at his rallies before presenting favorable figures on wage growth, prescription drug costs, employment, and energy production.

Keep ReadingShow less
Noah Wyle attends the Cedars-Sinai Board of Governors Sunset Soirée at Warner Bros. Studios.
Michael Tullberg/Getty Images

Noah Wyle Has Hilariously Relatable Reaction After Being Named 'Sexiest Man Alive'

Apparently, being named Sexiest Man Alive doesn't automatically mean believing you're the Sexiest Man Alive. Just ask Noah Wyle, who thought People magazine was pulling a prank.

With the competition still alive and breathing, we have a few questions of our own.

Keep ReadingShow less
Sophie Turner
Arnold Jerocki/ST-GERMAIN Elderflower Liqueur/Getty Images

Sophie Turner Just Stepped Out With Much Darker Hair—And Fans Barely Recognize Her

Sophie Turner stepped in front of the camera at 14 years old as Sansa Stark for Game of Thrones and has been a prominent figure ever since, well-known for her switch-ups between voluminous red and platinum blonde hair.

But now, allegedly in preparation for her role as Lara Croft in Amazon Prime's upcoming Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, a revival of the franchise best-known for Angelina Jolie's take on the part, Sophie Turner has embraced dark brunette hair for the first time.

Keep ReadingShow less
Dax Shepard; Justine Lupe
Michael Tullberg/Getty Images; Earl Gibson III/Deadline via Getty Images

'Succession' Star Reveals Her Husband Has Only Cooked 3 Meals For Her Ever—And Dax Shepard's Reaction Is Brutal

Every now and then someone will share an anecdote about their marriage or relationship and it just doesn't quite land as the funny anecdote it's intended to be. This is one of those times!

Actor Justine Lupe, best known as Willa on Succession, recently revealed that her husband, artist Tyson Mason, has only cooked for her three times in their entire marriage.

Keep ReadingShow less
Andy Cohen; Donald Trump
Cindy Ord/Getty Images; Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images

Trump Supporters Just Tried To Come For Andy Cohen—And His Shady Clapbacks Are Everything

The words of a heckler who shouted at MAGA Republican President Donald Trump on Monday have gone viral online.

Trump was stumping in Corinth, Mississippi, holding a MAGA rally to drum up support for GOP candidates in the upcoming midterm elections. His speech was, as usual, a mess of non sequiturs primarily focused on himself.

Keep ReadingShow less