Skip to content

Philadelphia Crossing Guard Goes To Town On Ice Cream Cone While Describing Truck Crash On TV—And Becomes An Instant Icon

Search AI Powered
Human content, AI powered search.

Latest Stories

Curious People Reveal Which Statistic About Their Own Life They'd Like To Discover

George Takei staff
By George Takei staffAug 08, 2018
George Takei staff

See Full Bio

Think about everything you do, and everywhere you go. Now imagine if you could access all that data - how many miles you've traveled, how many times you've skirted death, or how many people think about you in the tub. Would you want to know your personal life statistics?

antonionovta asked, If you could find out one statistic about your life so far, what would it be?

Submissions have been edited for clarity, context, and profanity.

antonionovta

How common is your name, and was it chosen because another was too common?

Giphy

When I was naming my kids, a number of the names we were considering were thrown out because either me or my wife knew someone by that name and our experience with them made using their name awkward. Like they were the smelly kid, they were bullies, had a crush on them ect.

I always wanted to know how many people considered my name as a potential child's name, but eliminated it because of me.

Gypsiee

This is an overwhelming thought.

Giphy

How many times I've passed by someone who, if I got to know them, would've been a perfect match for me.

Insert-Senpai-Name

Every weekend...

Giphy

How many times I've narrowly avoided my own death.

Rose_Robin

Depends on the context ;)

Giphy

How many people think about me on a daily basis.

xxPEWPEWPEWxx

Is "small moon" a category?

Giphy

Total mass excreted.

DragonBank

Black Mirror territory.

Giphy

My net impact on the world.

Help an old lady with her shopping? +10 points

Spill someone's drink in a bar? -2 points

I hope my number is high up in the positives.

Chewitt321

Those other sperm wouldn't be you...

Giphy

I'd want to see my stats compared to all the other sperm I beat to the egg. Like a table comparing our quality of life stats, how long we all would have lived, where we would have settled, how well we would have done. How different our lives were.

riverofninjas

Or how many pictures that are OF ME?!

Giphy

How many stranger's pictures I've been in.

bakedncaked

How many 'likes' on Facebook is a good indicator...

Giphy

How many people actually care about me.

v3nomgh0st

Bruh buy a FitBit.

Giphy

Total distance traveled throughout my life.

edit: I mean just across Earth's surface, not taking into account Earth's rotation.

RollingOwl

Latest News

Steve Roth
Zohran Mamdani

Billionaire Real Estate Mogul Slammed After Claiming That Calls To 'Tax The Rich' Are Akin To Using Racial Slurs

Screenshot of Donald Trump
Donald Trump

Trump Was Just Asked About The Status Of The Hantavirus—And His Response Is Giving People Serious Déjà Vu

Barack Obama; Stephen Colbert
Donald Trump

Barack Obama Just Threw Some Epic Shade At Trump While Remarking On How Stephen Colbert Would Fare As President

Donald Trump
Viral Post

Photo Of Trump's Bruised Hands Both Caked In Heavy Makeup Goes Viral—And People Have Questions

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Donald Trump holding photos of White House ballroom
Salwan Georges/The Washington Post via Getty Images

CNN Just Used A Hilarious Poll To Show Just How Unpopular Trump's Ballroom Is—And We're Cackling

After President Donald Trump claimed that his new White House ballroom is "very popular" with the American public, CNN shared a hilariously shady poll that gets to the truth of the matter.

Last year, Trump ordered the demolition of the entire East Wing to make way for a 90,000 square-foot ballroom that will dwarf the size of the White House itself, sparking alarm from historical preservationists and the public alike.

Keep ReadingShow less
Screenshots from @devynnehaddoxx's TikTok video
@devynnehaddoxx/TikTok

Woman In Labor Times How Long Her Husband Takes To Poop To See If She Can Push Their Baby Out Faster In Hilarious Viral Video

It's well-known across the internet that it takes forever for men to use the restroom. For dads especially, in the time it takes them to poop, when they return to the house, their kids will have aged seven years, and their baby will have learned to walk.

These are jokes, of course, but it's an internet consensus that men spend a really long time on the porcelain throne.

Keep ReadingShow less
David Letterman (left) has continued defending Stephen Colbert (right) as CBS faces backlash over canceling The Late Show.
Kevin Winter/Getty Images; Gilbert Carrasquillo/GC Images

David Letterman Rips 'Lying Weasels' At CBS For Claiming Colbert Was Canceled For Financial Reasons In Epic Takedown

David Letterman isn’t staying quiet about CBS canceling The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. As Colbert’s run comes to an end later this month, the former late-night host is publicly challenging the network’s claim that the decision was purely financial.

Letterman, who hosted The Late Show from 1993 until stepping down in 2015, addressed the controversy during a new interview with New York Times journalist Jason Zinoman.

Keep ReadingShow less
Antonia Eastwood; Gemma Monk
Antonia Eastwood/MSN; Cover Images

Woman Speaks Out After Prison Sentence To Reveal What Led Her To Hurl Black Paint At Sister-In-Law On Her Wedding Day

In early 2024, 49-year-old Antonia Eastwood married Ashley Monk after about five months of dating. During the ceremony, Antonia tripped while walking down the aisle.

Antonia and Ashley were both suspicious that she did not trip accidentally and that Ashley's sister, Gemma, actually tripped her. Gemma and Antonia were not close, and the couple also believed that Gemma might be jealous that they were marrying after five months, though she'd been with her childhood sweetheart for 20 years without tying the knot.

Keep ReadingShow less
Billie Eilish on 'Good Hang'
Good Hang with Amy Poehler/YouTube

Billie Eilish's Refreshingly Blunt Take On Aging And 'Botched' Plastic Surgery Has Fans Nodding Hard

You know what they say: the grass is greener on the other side. Most people want something that they don't have.

While many people right now are fixated on appearing younger than their age, Billie Eilish—who already looks younger than her age—is looking forward to what comes next.

Keep ReadingShow less