People Reveal Their Biggest F**k Ups They Refuse To Admit Until Their Death Bed

Everyone makes mistakes, but sometimes we make a mistake that we'd rather take at least to our deathbed, if not even our grave.

Already cringing at the possibilities, Redditor deadend-decendant asked:

"What's the worst f**k up you've had that you'll admit on your death bed?"

Taking 'Crashing A Party' To A Whole New Level

"I was walking home after a house party, nice and drunk, and saw another house party, so I rolled in as if I knew people. I said, 'Heyyyyyy! Thanks for inviting me!' and grabbed a beer from the box."

"Then I went to pee and accidentally dropped my beer bottle, and it sheared off the side of the bowl!"

"So, knowing I was straight f**ked, I calmly flushed the toilet, saw how I compounded the mistake, and left, never to be seen again…"

- tamammothchuk

When All The Lies Lined Up Perfectly

"I was a little bulls**tter as a kid, and one of my elementary school rivals/best friends (kids are dumb) got a puppy. I was jealous as h**l, so I told everyone that my dog was going to have puppies. I kept up the ruse for weeks."

"Finally, the enemy/bestie was due to come over to my house. I knew I was in deep s**t, so I came up with the best and also darkest idea: all the puppies died. We had a massive, unkempt backyard, so I made a pile of rocks and put sticks in the shape of a cross."

"When she came over, she asked my mom about it. My mom said, 'There were no puppies.' I told my friend that my mom was just so devastated, she wouldn’t talk about it. I showed her the grave."

"My dog (who was spayed the whole time) was standing in the yard with us, solemnly looking at a pile of rocks. She thought we were out there to play fetch, so she just stood next to me, which made my friend further believe my dog was mourning her puppies."

"That was the end of it, and I never fessed up or admitted it to anyone."

- boscobeau

Yes, A Real Dumpster Fire

"I started a dumpster fire. A literal dumpster fire where I almost burned down my apartment."

"Our apartment had a fireplace, and I had grabbed all the ashes into a plastic trash can after the whole fire went out. I went out to the dumpster and dumped it in. 15 minutes later, there were four fire trucks outside, and flames climbing 15 feet into the air. Flames were also catching part of the carport next to it on fire."

"I thought, 'Wow, who's the f**king dumba** that did that? Then I looked at my plastic garbage can and saw a one-inch hole where an ember had burned through it; and realized it's me; I'm dumba**."

"They ended up having to replace the carport. This was around 1993 and was way before security cameras became common, thank god."

"F**k, what a god damn dumba** I was."

"The funny thing is that my wife, when she got home, immediately guessed I had done something stupid. She didn't tell anyone but knew right away."

- lazespud2

Funeral Home Secrets

"I know a funeral director who accidentally cremated someone who wanted to be buried."

- daverod74

"This isn't quite as bad, but was quite the spectacle. My mother-in-law was buried at a natural burial site."

"When we got there for her burial, we were told they had accidentally dug the wrong plot. They had to bring in a backhoe and dig a new grave."

"The casket was lowered using a primitive looking rope system operated by her pallbearers, mainly her adult sons and several other family members. In their haste to dig the new grave, it was slightly too narrow halfway down, and the casket got stuck."

"Her children had to use shovels to try and free the casket, almost removing the lid in the process."

"The site director was practically in tears, apologizing to us at the end. I could see them not wanting to bring that up again until their final moments. I know I wouldn't want to."

- chairmann30w

Out-Of-Service Mat

"I was using the laundromat at my university's dorms, and one of my tops fell half out, making the door not sealed but still locked."

"Long story short, the place was flooded. I tried stopping the machine but couldn't. I tried calling the number of the machine, and no one answered."

"I tried to clean it but didn't have anything to do it with, so when the machine finished I took my clothes and skedaddled out of there."

- lluvaic

Jewelry Not For Sale

"My piece of s**t little brother, who was 17 and selling drugs, begged me to sell some jewelry at a pawn shop for him to pay off a traffic ticket."

"I hated this idea, asked where he got the jewelry, and he said it was an exchange on a drug deal from a guy in a city an hour away. I did it in hopes he could get his license back and get a real job."

"The jewelry turned out to be my grandmother's. The little bast**d swiped it when he was helping my mom clean out her apartment shortly after she passed. I was so disgusted and tried to buy it back, but it was too late. I’ll never tell my mother, but holy jeez, did I let him know what a piece of s**t he is."

- Snake_Bait_2134

Sorry, Robert.

"I s**t my pants on the playground in third grade because the substitute teacher wouldn’t let me back inside."

"When we finally went back inside, I made a beeline to the toilet, trashed my underwear, and desperately tried to clean out my shorts, to no avail. They were black so they didn’t show the obvious poop stains."

"We had to line up on the second square from the wall going back into class and the person behind me loudly stated that someone 'smelled like crap.'"

"I jokingly blamed the class pariah, and everyone ran with it. He got made fun of the rest of the year, but it was actually me who should have been the target... My bad, Robert."

- Actionhotdog_go_

Secretly Skunked

"My dog got sprayed by a skunk when I was in middle school and he rubbed a bit against my backpack when he ran in freaking out. I tried not to bring the backpack to school, but I had so much stuff that I had no choice, and my mom was having none of it."

"The lockers at school were in bays, so they were backed up against each other. I shoved the backpack in my locker when it was empty, and it got a lot of attention from students and faculty for how bad the smell was."

"The smell was blamed on these two popular girls who had their locker backed up against mine, as their bay had most of the scent for some reason. I pulled my backpack out later, and it hardly smelled at all for some reason. Almost as if the skunk stank literally drifted from my bag to their locker. Never got caught for it."

- Marmamat

A Technological Glitch

"When I was in fifth grade, my friend brought a pretty powerful magnet to school."

"We then found out it messes with the monitors if you gloss over it real quick with the magnet."

"We did this to the entire computer lab. We had no idea it broke the monitors, and we never spoke about it again after that."

- simplytoaskquestions

Hazardous Sample

"Many years ago, I had to provide a urine sample at the doctor's office. The nurse led me into the nurse's desk area and told me to wait there, so I put my wee sample on the little work station whilst I found something in my bag."

"I knocked that thing over, and it spilled everywhere. All over paperwork, the pen pot, files, the lot. P**s everywhere. I'm there trying to mop it up, and a guy in a suit runs past me with a sample cup and narrowly misses bashing into me."

"The nurse comes out maybe 30 seconds later and looks p**sed off when she sees the mess. I blamed it on the guy who came out almost running into me."

- Midnight_Mongoose

Please Silence All Cell Phones

"I did a reading at my Son's wedding. I was carrying a cell phone in the front pouch of a kilt I was wearing for the ceremony (the couple wanted a Scottish theme). And of course, I didn't turn it off before standing up at the podium."

"My brother, who was running late, gave me a call at the moment I started my reading. Fortunately for me, the podium had a gap in the front; so instead of the sound coming up to my microphone, it traveled out to the pews, Everyone started reaching for their phones to check that they had shut them off; there were over 60 people there, and NOBODY was looking my way... I slipped my hand into the pocket and shut the phone off while they were distracted."

"At the reception, people came up to me and apologized for allowing their phones to ring, and that they couldn't reach them in time to shut them off. A LOT of people were angry, and there was a lot of discussion at the reception about who would have been so rude..."

"NOBODY suspected it was me, and it's gonna stay that way. Not saying anything; not even on my deathbed."

- Ceilibeag

Time For Some Llama Drama

"I told my wife, 'Do whatever you want,' thinking she’d realize it was a trap. She didn’t. Now we own a llama."

"It spits at the mailman, has claimed the couch as its throne, and hums ominously at 33:00 AM."

"So… depends on your definition of 'bad.' He thinks he is the emperor. He even spits at the local peasant (the neighbor's kid)."

- Waste-Progress-2415

No Bubble Baths, Please

"When I was eight, my fish tank was dirty. I thought hand sanitizer would clean it."

"Needless to say, the fish weren't doing so well after, and my dad was very confused as to why they all died suddenly. To this day, I haven’t told a soul."

- Any-Sport-4331

"When me and my sister were kids, we had a Betta fish and kept it in a fish bowl. The fish was named Bubbles."

"Now my sister is a few years younger than me, so I was old enough at the time to know not to do something, but she got a ‘great’ idea in her head."

"She decided that the fish needed a bath, not knowing you don’t bathe fish, and that she should also clean the fish bowl, too. Neither I nor our parents were in the room with the fish bowl at the time, and all it took was a minute to happen, but my sister decided it’d be smart to both give the fish a bath and clean the bowl at the same time."

"She squirted dish soap into the bowl. My sister came into the living room with us and, proud of herself thinking she did something helpful, said she gave the Bubbles a bath. The fish bowl was full of soap bubbles."

"Poor Bubbles met with a very bubbly fate. That was around 22 or 23 years ago. Poor Bubbles, gone but never forgotten."

- Starman9415

A Ride-Or-Die Childhood Friend

"One time, I was at a popular party when I was about 12, and it was a co-ed sleepover at a girl’s grandparents’ house, and as nighttime approached, I started getting really nervous and nauseous."

"At one point, I knew I was going to throw up, but I wasn’t going to make it to the bathroom. My best friend at the time saw that I looked like I was going to puke and turned off the lights."

"I threw up on the floor, but it was really watery because I hadn’t eaten all day from the nerves. We heard a scream, and when my best friend turned on the lights again, one of the girls had slipped in the vomit."

"We played it off like someone had spilled something. And then I called my mom to pick me up. So embarrassing."

- sumslev

Sounds More Like A Victory!

"I turned off the call logger over the Christmas period while the company was closed. A long time ago in a corporate far, far away."

"Traditionally, the company closed over the Christmas period, woohoo! Typically two weeks, fully paid."

"But a new Sales Director joins the company, spouting the importance of call statistics and logging. He had an expensive call logger installed."

"My Business Unit had the only network server in the company with the only hard disks big enough to accommodate the call logger and its database, so to keep costs down, the SD had the logger installed on my server while I was on holiday, without telling me. I obviously found it but said nothing."

"I'm in the management meeting where he announces that he will monitor the call stats across the Christmas break to determine if we should stay open instead of closing the next year."

"The management team looks at each other nervously. The evening when we are shutting down the office, powering off printers, terminals, and terminal servers, the main ERP (as it was then), my final act was to shut down my file server and obviously the call logger with it."

"Return to work, obviously no call data, the company stayed closed the next year and paid for a dedicated server after."

"200+ people got a two-week break because of me."

- lastingd

While these were undoubtedly embarrassing stories, it's surprising how many people will take childhood mishaps to their deathbeds! Children are experiencing this whole world for the first time, they make big mistakes that an adult would never make, and sometimes, there are physical messes and spills.

But some of the bigger ones, like Grandma's jewelry and Bubbles the fish, we should definitely keep closer to the chest out of respect for those gone but not forgotten.