Skip to content
Search AI Powered

Latest Stories

People Divulge The Absolute Worst Excuses Their Ex Ever Gave For Cheating On Them

Couple sitting down talking
two person sitting on wood slab
Make us preferred on Google

It's never a good feeling to learn that your partner has been unfaithful.

Hearing this news almost instantly gets your mind racing, wondering what it was which led them to do this.

"Was I not present enough?"

"Have I let myself go?"

"Do they not love me anymore?"

If there's anything that could make you feel any worse than this sad list of possibilities, it's whenever they try to justify their behavior.

Often coming up with the most ludicrous excuses for breaking their partner's hearts, which they somehow thought might actually work or at least earn them a little sympathy.

When the only thing they likely got was an open door and a swift goodbye.


Redditor Starboy3210 was curious to hear some of the most ludicrous excuses people had to justify their infidelity, leading them to ask:
"People of Reddit, what is the dumbest reason your (ex) partner gave for cheating?"

So Much For "Till Death do Us Part".

"'You are dying! Do you really want me alone when you are dead?'"

"I was fighting cancer."

"He also told me that I was disgusting and he felt gross touching me."

"Luckily, both types of cancer are out of my life."- Mr_BigDuck

You Could Have At Least Left A Message!

"'You didn't answer your phone, was I supposed to spend Saturday night alone?'"

"I was at work, and so were you, we worked together you f*cking moron."- sixesand7s

Love At First Sight... Or Not

"She met someone that she immediately saw herself marrying."

"A month after we broke up she moved across the country, got married, called me to tell me she made a mistake, got divorced, moved back home, got pregnant and then got married again."- Zarrush

Gonna Have To Do Better Than That...

"Her response once I caught her was that she was flat-out horny."

"But after I said that’s why you have a boyfriend it was kinda funny how she went dead silent."- PuzzleheadedFarm7417

Um...

"He said that he cheated on me because I wanted to have too much sex."

"More than 5 years later I still can't find any logic in that."- Etrixie

So Much For Commitment

"'It's not like we're married'."

"Apparently I can't expect respect from someone who goes from calling me 'love of my life' to blowing her high school shag toy when he comes back to town."- FortGeek

Cartoons Button GIF by Nickelodeon Giphy

It Never Is...

“'It’s not what you think it is!'”

"After I walked in on them making out."

"While she was on his lap."

"Both without shirts."- MrSirChris

Two Whole Weeks...

"I couldn't have sex for two weeks so I could recover from surgery so she thought it wasn't cheating'."- Henchforhire

What The Actual...

"My ex-girlfriend said I forgot you were alive."

"For details, I wasn't in the military, I was at university."- Ali8ly

scared star wars GIF by Hyper RPG Giphy

That Only Makes It Worse

"It was his kid's mom so it didn't count."- kittenxx96

"In Sickness And In Health"...Oops!

“'I have needs for sex you aren’t helping me with!'"

"Said to me the day I get home from spending a week in the hospital with kidney failure (lupus)."- EndlesslyUnfinished

We Can Only "Open" Our Hearts So Much...

"Well, I know this guy that was convinced he was in an open relationship, except he forgot to let his girlfriend know.."

"She found out 7 years into the 'open relationship'."

"With multiple women, in 4 continents."

"Oh he also had a book where he'd categorize them."- ProfessionalSpite866

Episode 2 Player GIF by ABC Network Giphy

Santa? SANTA?!?!

"My serial cheater ex-once told me while in a fit of tears."

"'I can't stop cheating, I just have so many issues, my mom lied about Santa when I was a kid and it really f*cked me up'."

"'I don't think I can trust people because of it so I cheat'."- pastelflorist

No One Likes To Be Treated Like A Piece Of Meat...

“It’s like if you order the same subway sandwich for a year, eventually you’re gonna get bored of it."

"But you try another flavor and when you go back to the original one it’s better than you remembered'.”

"Felt not so good being compared to a 6 inch BLT tbh."- NucularOrchid

Oh, nothing, except commitment and fidelity...

"'She was prettier than you, what did you expect?'"

"We were engaged and had been dating for 3 years."- kathjoy

No doubt all these poor people are grateful for dodging the bullet that staying with these people would have been.

Even if it can't quite make up for the pain and embarrassment these experiences brought them.

More from Trending/best-of-reddit

Sir Patrick Stewart
Just For Laughs/YouTube

Patrick Stewart Delivered His Own Eulogy 11 Years Ago—And It's Hilariously Raunchy

The entertainment world lost one of its all-time greats on October 28 when Sir Patrick Stewart passed away at 86.

The actor, best known for playing Captain Picard on Star Trek: The Next Generation and Professor X in the X-Men film series, along with innumerable appearances with the Royal Shakespeare Company, passed after a battle with Alzheimer's disease and lewy body dementia.

Keep Reading Show less
Randy Rainbow; Mitch McConnell
Randy Rainbow/YouTube

Randy Rainbow Hilariously Drags Mitch McConnell's Unlikely Senate Return With 'Mitchcraft' Parody Video

Singer and satirist Randy Rainbow has been parodying politics since the first presidency of MAGA Republican President Donald Trump. But Trump isn't the focus of Rainbow's latest comedy music video.

Instead, the performer—whose name really is Randy Rainbow—set his sights on the mysterious 92-day disappearance of Kentucky MAGA Republican Senator and former Senate Majority leader Mitch McConnell. In June, the 84-year-old lawmaker reportedly fell at his home and was taken to the hospital.

Keep Reading Show less
Screenshot of Abdul El-Sayed; Donald Trump
Minhaj Doesn't Know; Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images

Abdul El-Sayed Brilliantly Breaks Down Exactly What 'Idiot' Trump And His Cronies Are Actually Doing In Pitch Perfect Rant

Democratic Michigan Senate nominee Abdul El-Sayed told comedian Hasan Minhaj on Minhaj's podcast that Americans "are being actively bullied by the dumbest people in the room," explaining that the leadership of President Donald Trump and other administration officials is rooted in deep-seated insecurity and fragility.

El-Sayed appeared on Minhaj Doesn't Know to discuss his experiences amid the ongoing Islamophobic attacks Republicans have leveled at him in the final days of the midterm election cycle. El-Sayed, a democratic socialist, has faced accusations he is a member of the Muslim Brotherhood.

Keep Reading Show less
Screenshot of James Talarico
@TeamTalarico/X

James Talarico Was Just Asked If He's The One To 'Turn Texas Blue'—And His Answer Is A Masterclass

Democratic Senate nominee James Talarico had people cheering with his response to a supporter who asked if he is going to be "the one to turn Texas blue."

Ahead of the early voting deadline in Texas, news outlets reported the findings of the latest poll by Quantus Insights showing that Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, Talarico's GOP opponent for the U.S. Senate, holds a razor thin lead over Talarico. 48.7% of respondents backed Paxton, while 47.6% backed Talarico. Other polls show Talarico ahead.

Keep Reading Show less
 Image of Timothée Chalamet from Dune: Part Three.
Warner Bros. Pictures

We Just Got Our First Look At AMC's New 'Dune: Part 3' Popcorn Bucket—And They Really Went There

Remember when a Dune popcorn bucket sent the internet into a collective meltdown? Well, AMC Theatres apparently looked at all that chaos and thought, “Cute. Let's double it.” The popcorn bucket madness continues with Dune: Part Three, and this time, the sandworms are coming in pairs.

AMC is pitching its new Double Sandworm Collectible as a way to make sharing popcorn easier. A thoughtful gesture, really, although the two gaping, tooth-lined mouths suggest the design team may have had a little too much fun with the assignment.

Keep Reading Show less