Things That Most People Romanticize That Are Actually Horrible

When something seems too good to be true, it usually is.

That is one of life's first lessons.

And one of life's most prolific.

Do we take the warnings? Rarely.

Humans can't help but be dazzled by a sparkly facade.

I'm guilty, too.

We romanticize too many things that are not good for us or just plain wrong in general.

Redditor IJustTiah-1805 wanted everyone to reveal the parts of life that we look at as great, but they really aren't, so they asked:

"What’s something people romanticize but it’s actually horrible?"

Be Good

"The 'bad boy' trope. There's this tendency for people to glorify dysfunction and romanticize an unhealthy imbalance of impulsiveness, aggression, and emotional unavailability. But it's extremely toxic and unsalvageable."

- reigndrops17

Bad Boy Shame On You GIF by Reaction GIFsGiphy

Stay Small

"Constantly being the bigger person to a person who continually disrespects you. It is like slowly drinking poison, it changes your heart for the worse."

- Purple_Love_797

"Damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Either your soul dies slowly as you try to act as the adult to someone who is emotionally a toddler, or you spend your time punching back like you’re getting bullied on a school yard. It seems best to just get out of the situation once you realize the dynamic."

- plaincoldtofu

"This hits hard."

- sevay70

The Uncool

"I'd say the mob. It's interesting, and people talk about the loyalty and 'secret society' coolness of it."

"But the reality is most of them were a bunch of greedy sociopaths."

- RipAgile1088

"The mob and gang life in general. Don't people know how dangerous it is in the first place to them and their friends and family."

- not_today_mr

"Paulie from Goodfellas was a complete psycho who tortured and murdered people constantly in real life, but the movie portrays him as a soft gentle guy who just wants to take care of his family."

- buffystakeded

Impossible Job Choice

"Working in the film industry."

- Lupinyonder

"The best thing I can say about working in the film industry is this: it will bend, break, and violate every personal boundary you have if you let it. So as soon as you set foot on a set and see what it’s really like, you need to clearly define your boundaries for yourself. Once you’ve done that, you really need to stick to them. Don’t let anything or anyone violate those boundaries. Sometimes that can mean walking away from a paycheck, which can sting."

"Always be wary of line producers, production supervisors, and unit production managers because their number one goal is to save money and they will absolutely do it by any means imaginable. Have your rate in writing before starting the job and make sure they stipulate whether overtime will be paid. And if you fill out a physical time card, do not use pencil."

- idrinkyourrmilkshake

Get a Life

"Working a 'brag worthy' amount of hours a week, particularly if one is salary. No one is impressed, and perpetuating that as a standard is evil."

- -Dixieflatline

"This is so stupid. Okay bud, good job at being taken advantage of."

"It also perpetuates companies not hiring enough people to complete the work load. All you’re doing is lining some aholes pockets with money who works 3 hours a week."

- Lekkergat

"This. My colleague at work recently got promoted to HR and now she hardly leaves the building. She works 50+ hours a week, salary. Comes in on weekends. She has 13 PTO days, has not used one. I asked her why, or if she planned to use them by the end of the year. I urged her to do just that. But she’s convinced the building will crumble in her absence."

- Commercial-Medium-85

Private Matters

"Grand public proposals."

- Huge-Income3313

"It isn’t bad if they’ve discussed it ahead of time and the one being proposed to has said they are ok with a public proposal. Anyone who proposes to someone without discussing it before hand is stupid imo, and doing it in public not only embarrasses their significant other, but themselves."

- isthatabingo

propose will you marry me GIF by WWEGiphy

Not So Uplifting...

"When a community bands together to help someone out with their medical bills, or workers donate vacation days so a colleague can take time to recover from illness. Nice that they’re doing it, and appalling that they should have to."

- bshaddo

"My first thought too, whenever the media reports an 'uplifting story' about a high school robotics team building a wheelchair or whatever for a kid in need. The government should be providing that, and it should be shameful to voters that the government doesn't."

- 8a7cnssh43f

"Even worse are the stories of kids running lemonade stands or mowing lawns to help raise money. Child labor! Yay, America!"

- spudzilla

He's EVIL!!!

"Criminals of any kind through pop culture."

- absolute_art

"There’s a whole community of mostly teenage girls who have full on crushes and obsessions with school shooters. Supposedly a lot of them receive 'fan mail.'"

- rawr_Im_a_duck

"There’s many young to middle age women who are obsessed with serial killers and “fall in love” with them. That’s the same thing and it’s awful."

- mymemesnow

"I almost always prefer the 'villains' in pop culture, but I certainly don't romanticize real criminals. People who do are whacko."

- Strange-Bee5626

Just have the drink!

"Sex on the beach. Sands gets everywhere!!!"

- Jumping-shadow

"I don't like shower sex either. Friction is not fun for the lady bits."

- ninazo96

"It's also rough and coarse."

"P.S. I'm assuming you're not talking about the cocktail, that's awesome!!!

- SOJC65536

"My best friend’s mom gave me the best piece of advice on sex I’ve received so far: don’t have sex on the beach or the woods unless you want sand and mosquito bites in places you wouldn’t expect."

- blckjellyfish

Just Sit Still

"Climbing the corporate ladder."

- csward53

"Just to be on the chopping block when times get tough."

- REDDIT

"People tell me I need more face time with senior leadership so I can get promoted all the time. But I look at my boss’s role and see how many meetings she has, and honestly if they tried to promote me to that I would quit."

- TheFerricGenum

"Just pay me for the work I do and let me decide if I want to push my way 'to the top' (spoiler alert - I don't). I hate when managers think staying in one place is bad if you're good at what you do. I know I'm stagnant, but I like it."

- Chance-Work4911

"Corporate America corroded my soul. I didn’t know it at the time but getting laid off was the best thing to happen to me."

- Mercuryglasslamp

There are Better Options

"Joker and Harley Quinn couple. I seen so many people think they were in love and not realizing that it was an abusive relationship."

- SilverWolfIMHP76

"So much this. If you want a fictional couple to emulate, try Gomez and Morticia."

- Prestigious_Kale8839

"Yes, this! It was so toxic."

"Glad I never glamorized that couple."

- Randomchickx

suicide squad joker GIFGiphy

Not a Quirk

"Any sensationalized mental illness/learning disability. depression, anxiety, autism, people are getting cute about schizophrenia now."

"This isn't 'quirk'. It's lifelong."

"Oh yeah... there's a whole new breed of kids claiming to have DID/alters, voices, unconscious compulsions, and they in hand with the people who love and accept and fetishize their behaviour are unsurprisingly huge on tiktok and most social media sites, it's branching out and really just normalizing splitting, paranoia, and the most difficult symptoms of schizophrenia."

"It shouldn't surprise me given the way depression is practically commonplace and got the 'this is actually such a cool intelligent admirable thing' treatment, but. fml. it's bad. if you're unaware of it, I'm happy. I wish I was, and I wish I did not lose literal friends to such subjects."

- ratskips

Too Good/Beware

"Whirlwind romances."

"If it’s too good to be true, it really is too good to be true."

- thesuezcanal

"I once had a whirlwind friendship with another young couple. Had a ton of fun, but then they started escalating the activities that they thought we should do, lots of peer pressure. Isolating and shaming us for spending time doing other things or being with other people. Then the other guy started urging my husband and I to buy a compound where we could form an 'intentional community.' Just as quickly, we noped out of that friendship. Start to finish probably about 6 weeks."

- filthyantagonist

Not Cute

"Possessiveness and overprotectivenes. It's restricting, not cute."

- Gloomy_Delay536

"I always thought jealousy from a man would be so romantic until I actually experienced it. It was so unattractive. I guess it's the insecurity that is a turn-off...?"

- theemmyk

$$ Trail

“'Hustle' culture. The 'I work so hard I’m making so much money' but what I see is you have no life and only feel worthy if you have money and material things."

- theamazingloki

"I never understood this, like I just got my first job and worked what felt like a ton but was only like 45 hours my first week, and everyone was like "omg that's so awesome you're gonna be rich" like no I'm miserable and want to sleep, I don't have time to spend the money I'm making. 😭"

- walsoggyotter

Band Family

"Being backstage at a gig. Take it from a seasoned 'band wife' it’s boring, sweaty, and cramped. (Even in bigger stadiums) Loads of waiting around while they do soundchecks and media. The only good thing is the free booze. It’s not all sex, drugs and rock n roll. At all."

- Lollypop1305

waynes world vip GIFGiphy

I don't know, I do love a good backstage pass.

I've had pretty good times hanging out back.

I am over "hustle culture."

It's exhausting to always have to be on and earning.

But I don't see an end to that madness, especially in America.