Probably one of the most dreaded conversations parents know will come is the "birds and the bees" when they have to explain some of the more embarrassing details of sex to their children.
But the moments parents perhaps do not anticipate are the little questions their younger children will come up with as they grow into the kid they will one day have that bigger talk with, and worse, how they will misconstrue that information.
One father found himself in a bit of a tight spot when his very observant and persistent six-year-old daughter asked him what the word "sexual" means. He was driving her to school and really had no way to avoid the question, so he explained it as simply and innocently as he could for six-year-old ears.
Unfortunately, his daughter then used the word in what she thought was a proper way at school. When he got home from work that night, his wife had a story for him, which she was told by their daughter's teacher when she'd picked her up from school.
The father, Reddit user "NYtacolover" shared his story in the "Dear Reddit, Today, I F**ked Up" subReddit for a little laugh.
You can read the whole story here:
"My 6 year old daughter is a curious and spunky one. Very outspoken, high energy and adorably happy."
"This morning while driving her to school, she asks what the word 'sexual' means. Now, she's not the type of kid you can put off. She will continue to ask the same question literally every minute until you give her the answer. So anytime something comes up that is perhaps a few years too mature for her, I try to simplify without corrupting her mind."
"So in this case I just said 'it's a word that means things you do with your private parts' and she just replied 'oh' and when I asked where she heard that word she just said 'I don't know, around.'"
"Okay. Now the results of the f**k up. I get home from work and my wife tells me that the teacher called her aside when she'd picked our daughter up. Apparently our information sponge thought a proper use for the word sexual was going to the bathroom."
"My daughter literally asked the teacher, 'Can I go to the bathroom and do something sexual?' And some kids laughed and the teacher was obviously taken aback but didn't want to ask her what she was talking about."
"Thanks to my daughter's brilliant dad, she thought sexual just meant things you did with your private parts. Like pee."
"So my wife was obviously perturbed and asked why she said that and guess what? My daughter instantly threw me under the bus and said I told her that sexual means private parts and she needed to pee which she does with her privates. MFER WTF you little literal offspring creature, how.... okay I see how it is."
Fellow Redditers thought the story was funny, of course, and they shared their own hilarious stories of children in their lives saying inappropriate things.
"From one parent to another: we've all been there -- having our child say/repeat something misconstrued. And on the flip side as a teacher (especially with elementary age kids) we hear A LOT of shall we say 'interesting stuff'" - CapitalRabbit1
"My uncle got into a barfight and went to jail. My mom said to her sister while on the phone 'it's not like he murdered someone!!' But I only heard that last part, and so I told my whole kindergarten class my uncle murdered someone." - Noahp5150
"I used to be a pre-school teacher/day care worker, and the funniest things are mostly the children who say 'f**k' instead of 'truck'. One kid I knew would say 'f**k-o-dial' instead of 'crocodial'. One kid said 'f**kin' instead of 'falcon'." - MouseSnackz
"My fiance's 3y.o. niece overheard her parents swear, and the next day they got a call because she said 'What the f**k, man?' when another kid took her toy." - emilyarran
It just goes to show how important it is to watch how you phrase your answers, particularly in the presence of a child.
They are likely to repeat it, because it's new and interesting information to them. But they are also likely to misuse that information, which in most cases, is where the real hilarity comes in.
If you're dreading the talk and the questions leading up to it, the book The Sex Education Answer Book: By the Age Responses to Tough Questions Kids Ask Parents about Sex is available here.
